The Female Brain Page #3
- NOT RATED
- Year:
- 2017
- 98 min
- 790 Views
What if there are perverts
on here?
They could make a house
out of garbage.
Mom, four percent of men
are sociopaths
so I'm sure there are
some perverts on there
but it's not exclusively
for perverts.
Why are we talking
about perverts?
Can you please
just delete those photos?
Okay. But I don't know
which ones to delete.
You've got a ton
of photos on here.
This is a jackpot
for perverts.
Okay, mom, will you please
just delete the album
that says "Wedding?"
What about
the honeymoon album?
You wanna keep that one.
Mom, any photos of Eric.
Any photos with his face
in them.
Please just delete it.
He was so nice.
And what a handsome couple
you were.
I just don't understand
what happened.
What happened
was he left me.
It's very simple.
[hammering]
Bill, why aren't you using
a stud finder?
Why isn't he using
a stud finder?
Because Eric took
the stud finder.
Bill, you are ruining
her drywall.
- Bill, it looks
ridiculous like that.
- Ridiculous?
That looks ridiculous, huh?
I'll tell you.
How about I take it
and I throw it
through that window
out onto the front lawn?
Is that less ridiculous?
Great. Now she's doing
the singing thing.
- You know she doesn't
like us to argue.
- No, no, it's fine.
Children who were exposed
to maternal stress
to stress chemicals
in the womb.
Later in life,
these offspring grow up
to be more anxious
and easily adrenalized.
The scientific term
for this
is epigenetic imprinting.
But it's commonly
referred to as
turning into your mother.
If I have learned
anything in this life
it's that I can't stop
you two from fighting.
So you can just
continue on
and I will soothe
my sympathetic
nervous system
with my "Lala Song."
La la la-la la
See? You see, Bill,
what you did?
See? See, Bill.
Say something.
- I love you. Okay?
- Oh.
I love you.
Oh, that's it.
Turn around.
That's not rude at all.
Turn around
I like to tell the back
of your head..
He was such a nice boy.
- No he wasn't, mom!
- Hello.
Basker brings it
up court.
He's looking
for an outlet.
He's yo-yoing up
and down mid-court.
Bounced past the room,
back to Basker.
He takes it to the..
Oh! He went down hard!
[whistle blows]
Oh, this does not
look good.
He is not getting up.
You can see the look
of concern
on Coach Miles' face.
Major setback
for the team.
It's only three months.
Mona will help you
get up the stairs.
- It's..
- Oh, thanks, Mona.
You hungry?
You want some breakfast?
No? A bagel?
We got a comical amount
of bagels. Okay.
Why doesn't
she talk to me?
I don't think
she knows you.
Do you ever feel weird
having all these people
in our house?
Yeah, but we both work
so who's gonna do
all this stuff?
That's true.
We need a wife.
- Oh! I agree.
- Who is this guy?
That's Jimmy, he usually
comes on Mondays.
You're at practice.
The area
that's responsible
for defending your turf
is larger in
the male brain
and it contains
special circuits
to detect territorial
challenges
by other males.
When challenged,
males produce
more testosterone
and adrenaline,
which immediately makes
men more confident.
Oh, hey, man.
- What's up?
- Hey, Greg.
- Okay.
- I'm Jimmy.
Hey, yup.
- I deliver
your groceries, um..
- Okay.
- Ah. Yeah.
- Ah!
- I'm a hugger. Yeah.
- Yeah.
- I'm Canadian.
- Okay.
Somebody delivers
our groceries?
Honey, you eat
like four chickens a day.
Oh, Zoe..
...I just picked
some fresh tomatoes
for you from my garden.
They're super ripe,
so be careful.
Oh, Jimmy.
You're my hero.
Okay, I don't need
all these people
in my house
doing what I'm
perfectly capable
of doing myself.
Well, since you're
gonna be around here
the next couple of months
why don't you oversee
the redo of the bathroom?
Or how about I redo
the bathroom myself
so there's not all these
strange men in my house?
You're gonna build
a bathroom?
Yeah, just give me
the tiles
and the other items
I will need.
Building a bathroom
takes skill.
You know, you have to
like, measure tiles.
You --
Zoe,
I'm a physical marvel.
My hand-eye coordination
is in the .01 percentile.
- Okay.
- Try me.
Throw something at me.
Anything.
Oh!
Okay, so I wasn't ready
for that
because no one's ever
thrown jelly --
Right, so I beat
a physical marvel?
This is great.
Well now I can start my day.
- Oh, good.
- This is good.
'Cause I have that meeting
with that
venture capitalist
at 10:
00. Remember?- Alright. Bye.
I love you.
- Alright.
Yeah. I just gotta
carb-up over here.
I've got a bathroom
to refurb.
- Can I tell you
something?
- Yeah, sure.
With all due respect?
And I mean..
- I couldn't
help but hear.
- Yeah?
I think you're
a physical marvel.
- Dude. Thank you!
- You're welcome.
I was tryin'.. I try..
Sometimes she doesn't..
I don't think
she respects what I do.
- She doesn't get you.
- No. She was..
She didn't play.
She didn't appreciate sports.
She was a mathlete.
I -- I would like to say
that maybe she doesn't
appreciate you.
Yeah. What..
- Ah, you see!
And she throws jelly.
- Yeah!
Jelly's not really
something you catch.
- Jelly's something
you eat. Yeah.
- Right.
- Of course I'm ready.
Yeah. Here we go.
Those were two peppers
in a bag!
That was like catching
nunchucks.
Okay.
There we go.
Ooh, sh*t.
Still got it.
So this is what
it's come too, huh?
For us to hang,
I've gotta come meet you
at a children's playground
at a school?
This can't be legal,
man.
Look, I've got a family.
If you wanna hang out
with me, you've got
three options.
Work, school,
or on the side of my house
by the garbage cans.
- Can I ask you a question?
- Yeah, sure.
What do you think
about my hair?
Uh, I think less than
nothin' about your hair.
Lexi wants me to
straighten it.
Mm.
Yeah. I mean,
that's an obvious no, right?
If my wife wanted me
to straighten my hair
I would do it
without question.
I'd just go through
the rest of my life
looking like
Katt Williams.
- Pimpin'.
- I don't know, man.
I feel like I gotta draw
the line somewhere,
you know?
This is a slippery slope.
That's not how this works.
She will never stop
bringing it up.
See, look, women,
they can't beat us
physically, right?
Right.
So, the way to control us
is by beatin' us
emotionally.
Wearing down
our self-esteem.
Like little kidney shots
to the soul.
You ain't even
doing this right.
- What do you mean?
- Ah!
Well, look, I..
I'm fine with my hair.
I don't think
about my hair.
I don't care.
I'm a guy.
She wants me to straighten
my hair? Who does that?
You're spittin'
in the wind, man.
My wife buys
my clothes in bulk
tells me where to be
and what to pick-up.
I'm basically
a driver for Postmates.
- But do you like it?
- Do I like it?
I don't even know
what that means anymore.
It's like asking
a zombie if he likes
the taste of brains.
It's irrelevant.
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"The Female Brain" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 29 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/the_female_brain_20205>.
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