The Final Test Page #7

Hit him for a six?

Why not?

Oh, because hes right I suppose.

After all when you get down to it

thats all it is, isnt it?

Sammy, are you feeling alright?

Oh, its a good game alright.

Im not saying it isnt.

Best in the world, I think but then Im good at it.

Or at least, I used to be.

You know Syd, my father never wanted

me to go in for cricket.

Wanted me in the building trade, like him.

Well, shows how wrong he was, doesnt it.

- Does it?

- Well, youve made a bit, havent you.

Oh, Ive made a bit, alright.

Crickets been good to me ...

... and Im not complaining, but

the trouble with making a game ...

... your profession is that youre

at the top too young.

The rest of way is a gentle slide down.

Not so gentle sometimes.

It makes one feel so ruddy useless and old.

Well, at least you reached the top Sam.

More than I did.

Your names known to millions.

Yes, Syd, and Im grateful for that I suppose.

But it isnt enough.

It isnt nearly enough.

A mans got to feel that hes justified

himself in his life somehow ...

... and well building things is different.

What youve built is there when youve

done and you can look at it ...

... and say thats what Ive done

and then call it useful and ...

... Ive served a good purpose doing it.

Writing, thats the same I suppose.

What youve written is there ...

... on paper and people can read

it and act it ...

... even if a lot of people dont

understand it or appreciate it.

But banging a bit of leather around a field.

Ill bang his bit of leather when I see him.

Oh, it isnt only Reg.

Ive been thinking it a long time.

Only, I had hoped that Reg wasnt thinking it too.

Thats not how it is with your kids?

- I dont expect he meant it.

- Oh he meant it alright.

Oh well. Syd, I want runs today

more than Ive ever wanted them before.

Youll get them. Only, if youre

going to be out LBW ...

... dont do it my end, theres a fellow.

Now dont look at my feet.

I know Ive got the wrong shoes on ...

... but Im not killing myself for anyone today.

- Thats quite a hat, Ethel.

- Oh, thanks Syd.

Some people dont like it you know.

Some people think it looks silly.

I didnt say it looks silly.

I simply said I thought you had ...

- ... it on the wrong way round, thats all.

- Oh.

Shell never forgive me for that, you know.

Now youre not going to let what

Reg said upset you, are you.

- Reggie? Ive forgotten all about him.

- I dont think.

Well, heres my lucky farthing.

It always works.

Put it in your pocket before you go in to bat.

Thanks love.

- Yes?

- My name is Palmer. I have an appointment ...

- ... with Mr Whitehead.

- I think there must be some mistake.

Im his secretary and make all

Mr Whiteheads appointments for him.

Oh, but Ive come all the way from London especially.

- When did you make this appointment?

- Last night on the telephone.

Oh ... oh yes, I think he told me

something about it.

- Would you come in, Mr Palmer.

- Thank you.

What time did Mr Whitehead say

he would see you?

- Eleven oclock.

- Was it about anything special?

Well, he asked me to show him this poem of mine.

A poem. I see. Thank you.

Well, if you wouldnt mind sitting down.

Ill go and see Mr Whitehead and

tell him youre here.

The only thing is, hes really busy

at the moment.

It may be just a little bit difficult

to disturb him.

I shant be a minute.

- Go away.

- Time to surface, Alex. Alex!

- Did you pinch me?

- Yes.

- Youre sacked.

- I cant be. You sacked me last night.

I dont remember doing anything so

sensible last night.

What idiotic game, Canasta is.

- Did I really lose 8 and ten pence?

- Yes.

Oh dear. Too much sun. Take it away.

What about your Ode to the Sun

in the Listener last year?

I hadnt been playing Canasta til 5 in the morning.

Its only 11. I havent had my eight hours.

Fanshaw, you horrible woman go away.

Im going to sleep again.

Youll do nothing of the kind.

Youve got a lot on hand today.

Later, dear, later.

Besides, Master Palmer is downstairs

waiting for you.

Who might Master Palmer be, as if anybody cared.

The character you invited down to

see you last night.

I did nothing of the ki...

I did.

How dare you let me do a thing like that.

What else do I pay you for except

to stop me inviting beastly little boys ...

- ... to my country retreat?

- A few other things.

- Well, cope with him dear.

- How?

Ive developed a very serious illness in the night.

It doesnt prevent you flying to America tomorrow.

No. It only lasts 24 hours.

Tropical origin. Very rare.

- Hes come all the way from London.

- Then he can go all the way back to London.

Hell go when youve seen him and not before.

Oh bother.

That was his poem.

He wanted you to comment on it.

I have commented.

Now read it properly and come down

and be sweet to the poor boy.

Remember, you were his age ... once.

I very much doubt it.

How long will you be? Youve got

an awful lot of letters to do today.

I should think about 2 hours.

Ive come to remember, I cant

see anyone at all this morning.

As for the letters. Out of the question.

- Why?

- I have my poem to write for the New Statesman.

- Well you can do that this afternoon.

- It will take me all day.

- When are you going to see this boy then.

- In the spring.

Alex, youve got to see him.

I wont have you, behaving like this.

- Do you understand?

- Very well then I shall see him ...

- ... at lunch time.

- Do you want him to stay for lunch?

Are absolutely insensible to human suffering?

I shall see him for 5 minutes at 1:30 precisely.

- I may give him a cocktail.

- Cocktail?

Well ginger pop then. Do go away Jess.

How can I enjoy my breakfast with ...

... you fluttering round me like an expectant vulture.

Shoo!

Ebon Night

TS Ella Willer Eliot.

Oh, its rather good.

Oh, Mr Palmer. Im so sorry.

Im afraid theres been a little mistake.

Mr Whitehead is quite sure that

the time he arranged with you ...

... on the telephone last night was

for half past one.

Half past one. But he said 11.

He did really.

Well perhaps you misheard him.

- Oh gosh. How awful. Couldnt he possibly ...

- No. Im afraid not.

Hes very busy at the moment. Would you

like me to make another appointment for you?

Well, how long is he going to be in New York?

- Rather a long time, Im afraid.

- Oh, I think Ill stay.

- The harms done now, anyway.

- The harm?

Well you see, I shouldnt really be here at all.

- Where should you be?

- Oh, it doesnt matter.

- Is it important?

- Well, it depends rather on how ...

... you look at it.

- Good morning.

- Oh, morning.

Good morning, Maam.

- Oh, good morning.

My word, I am surprised to see

you here again today.

Well, maam, I said to myself this

morning, if they can take it ...

... I guess I can too.

- Hello Sam.

- Oh, hello.

- Well, youre not windy are you?

- Yes.

I thought you old chaps got over that.

You never get over it.

Oh theres nothing to it, Sam.

Its easy stuff.

Youre taking Cora out on Tuesday, aren't you?

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