The Game Plan Page #3

Stand right here, don't do anything.

I'm not giving you 28 grams

of empty carbohydrates.

We do not do simple sugars

in this house.

But I'm a kid and kids love sugar.

I mean, the simpler the better.

Well, my dad never let me have sugar.

Oh, is that why you never smile?

Mmm.

Listen, you better eat your food

before it gets cold.

But it's as big as a mountain.

Listen, if you're going to make the pros,

you have to get your appetite up.

Let's go. Eat.

You got a little...

- A little something right here.

- What?

I got what?

I'm going to go and wash the dishes.

You can eat.

And finish eating.

I don't have a guest room

because I don't like guests.

But you can sleep here.

- What's this?

- That is a universal remote.

It controls the world.

And you don't need to touch it.

What's the "romance" button for?

The romance button

is for a little Valentine's Day magic.

Turn... Turn this off. Turn it off.

Turn it off.

Turn it off. Press the button.

Turn it off.

Stop touching things.

Aren't you going to tell me

a bedtime story?

Bedtime story... Bedtime story.

Yeah.

The Big Bad Wolf

blew down the Grammy's house

and ate the Goldilocks

and then there was something

about the porridge.

The end.

Good night.

I mean a real bedtime story, Joe.

A bedtime story is supposed

to make you feel peaceful.

I'll show you.

Lean back, relax,

and listen to the story.

Fine. Fine. I'm going to listen

to this one time, then that's it.

Then you go to sleep.

Do you understand me?

Once upon a time there was a princess

and she had a lot of beautiful dresses.

She had a pink dress, a red dress,

a blue dress, a green dress,

a purple dress,

- an orange dress, a yellow dress...

- I get it. I get it. I get it.

A lot of dresses, a lot of colors.

So what?

So each dress had a secret power.

The pink dress,

which had pink sparkles all over it,

could make her fly.

And the blue dress,

which had blue sparkles all over it,

could make her tiny.

And the green dress,

which had green sparkles all over it,

could make her sleep.

Whoa!

Hey, baby.

Why didn't you answer me

when I called?

I was starting to get worried.

I'm sorry. I forgot I had

my phone turned off from the flight.

Well, I'm just happy that you got

there safely. So, how's it going?

Great. Well, the food's not so hot,

but my room is huge.

Well, that's very cool,

but how's the ballet?

I mean, is it as good as they promised?

Too soon to tell.

Hey, listen, sweetie, it's almost

time for my flight to take off,

but I will call you

as soon as I can, okay?

I miss you so much already.

E- mail me lots of pictures.

And Peyton, I love you.

I love you, too. Bye.

Is there a ballet school close by?

Spike?

Why is my dog in a dress

with pink nail polish?

He's learning Swan Lake.

Do you know how to fix

a ballerina bun?

Do I look like I know

how to fix a ballerina bun?

My mom says we're not supposed to

pop our knuckles.

Well, your mom

didn't sleep on a hard sofa

instead of her specially designed

$ 10,000 orthopedic bed

made by Dr. Johan Gustavo,

of Switzerland.

- What's... What's with the Beethoven?

- It's Tchaikovsky.

- Do you listen to this every morning?

- No.

Sometimes I listen to Bach,

or Rachmaninoff...

Do you have an iPod?

Because I'm going to buy you one.

Immediately. Right now.

I'm going to buy you an iPod.

Until then...

Whoa...

What is this?

My Bedazzler.

Doesn't Camille look pretty?

A Bedazzler?

And that's why I use

tuna for protein and flavor.

Mmm.

- Gross.

- Little liquid chickens.

Yeah, that's my favorite.

Joe's juice.

Okay. That's enough.

I'm gonna need you to drink up.

You'll be running the 40

in under 4.5 in no time.

That smells worse than school food.

You know, speaking of school,

why aren't you in it?

- I'm on break.

- In January? No you're not.

Yes, I am. I go to a magnet school,

so I have January off.

Really? Well, guess what?

I'm not on break.

As a matter of fact,

I'm on the opposite of break.

So I'm gonna need you

to come over here,

put some hustle in it,

and drink your breakfast.

- Peyton, stop messing around.

- What?

Peyton!

No!

Nice.

That's real nice.

- You know what a playbook is?

- I'm guessing it's a book with plays?

Oh, I get it. The Xs are for kisses

and the Os for hugs.

Wrong! The X's mean

"stay out of these areas of the house. "

The O's mean "open access. "

For example, you want to go

to the kitchen, straight buttonhook.

But now you go to the kitchen, big X.

Off limits. No access.

Can't go there, because you made

a mess in the kitchen.

Do you understand?

No trick plays, no flea-flickers. Got it?

Got it. No flea-flickers.

This is your game plan.

Learn it. Live it. Love it.

That's it, boys.

Practice is over.

Pick a nanny, Joe.

- I'll take the one at...

- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Don't you think

you should ask some questions first?

I've got great instincts.

The one on the end, Stella.

Edna.

The other end, Stella.

Blondie, you're up.

Oh, no. No.

The King picked me!

We are going to be just like sisters!

Oh, my goodness.

You start tomorrow.

Hey. You're going

to the opening tonight, right?

It's my restaurant.

Oh.

Well, what are you

going to do with her?

I don't know.

Hi. Hello.

Welcome, Mr. Kingman.

- The Maloofs!

- About time, there, Joe.

You made it. Have fun.

- Yeah.

- Enjoy yourself.

- Hey, Joe.

- Hey, man.

- How you doing?

- Hey.

- Jo Jo!

- Hey, nice to see you.

Hey, everything's on Joe tonight.

And that's exactly what I said.

I told them.

I said, "Listen, I'm the greatest. "

The purple or the yellow?

Hmm.

Mmm?

Mmm.

That's what I was thinking, too.

I'll be back.

Water the lawn. Water the lawn.

Hey, great night, Mr. Kingman.

Indeed it was, Jay. Indeed it was.

Hey, Joe! This way!

Number one on the field

and number one in your heart.

I've got sunshine

On a cloudy day

Yes, I do.

When it's cold outside

I've got the month of May

I guess you'd say

What can make me

What can make me

feel this way

My girl

Joe?

My girl

Talking about my girl

My girl... Peyton!

Joe?

Joe. Joe, where are you?

There you are.

Joe, I thought you forgot about me.

Peyton! Peyton! Peyton!

Hey, Joe, is that your daughter?

- Peyton!

Hey, Joe, you forget something?

Father of the year!

Yesterday, Fanny's Burgers

agreed to hand out

your action figure

with every order of fries.

But do you think

they're going to want a spokesman

who forgot his child in a bar?

Hmm?

My mom says that Fanny's

makes kids fat and gives them gas.

Well, your daddy's agent says

Fanny's makes him fat with cash.

Now, I have to put together

a press conference, do some cleanup.

I'm the janitor, Joe's the mop,

and Peyton's the mess.

What?

- Something funny, Larry?

- Just a little throat tickle, sir.

Well, get it fixed.

Right here. Chop-chop.

You got a station wagon, Stella?

No, you did.

Say "bye-bye" to being

the Big Bad Dad of Boston.

Oh, no.

Oh, yes.

You want me to sign that?

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes