The Gamers Page #2

I am imprisoned

in the south.

She wishes us to free her.

Dude, you're still asleep.

Me too?

Yeah.

Free you? Where are you mysterious lady?

Who holds you prisoner?

The Shadow.

The Shadow?

The Shadow?

The Shadow.

Fear not, noble lady.

We shall free you.

By morning you will again

sup the sweet air of freedom.

Sup the sweet air of freedom?

Shut up!

You guys are all asleep!

Not you Rogar.

Oh... sorry.

To the south,

come to the south...

Past the river through the

ruins of the ancient castle...

Free me. Please.

To the south.

You journey southwarn(?)

for several days.

You brave dark forests,

cross vast plains.

you climb steep cliffs and

wind through mountain trails.

Day after day, the four

of you push farther south.

Uh, the five of us.

Right.

After a week's journey you come

to a river that blocks your path.

Dude.

What.

Aren't you forgetting something?

Like what?

Like your character's paralyzing

fear of water, perhaps?

Oh, yeah,

that's right.

There's no bridge or boat,

but it is shallow enough to wade across.

I'm not going near any water.

Well, we'll have to knock him out.

What?

I punch in the head.

Roll em.

Ambrose takes 2 damage,

but he's not out.

Here, let me try.

I'm a better fighter.

Let's see, where's my good die.

Uh, here it is. Come on 20.

Am I unconscious yet?

No but you took

another 4 damage.

Here let me.

Here's my good die.

Roll well

Alright. I'll show you guys how to do this.

Carefull!

Well. Ambrose is very unconseious.

That's 19 damage.

19?

I'm dead!

You killed me!

Oops. Does anyone

have healing magic?

He did.

I'm sorry?

Way to f***ing

kill me, dude!

Well, just roll up another character.

He can jump in later.

19 damage.

After you cross the river...

Wait, wait! Cross the river.

Shouldn't we, like, bury him?

You know, like give

him a proper funeral?

I agree.

Thanks guys!

Yeah, dude, we get, like,

15 piety points per level

when we bury a party member,

and since he was level 6...

That'd be like 90 points!

Boo yah!

And that'll totally make up

for that orphanage we burned down.

Alas, poor Ambrose,

we hardly knew thee.

Dibs on the knife.

I get the bag.

The staff is mine.

After burying Ambrose, you

make it safely across the river.

You continue your voyage

south along the forest trail.

Everything goes smoothly until...

Uh, wait a minute

An ambush?

I'm an elf. I shouldn't

have missed the ambush.

So, you were taken

by surprise.

Why didn't I get

a surprise roll?

I rolled for you.

You failed.

Still I have the detect ambush

skill. Dude, I wanna roll.

Dude, you were surprised!

No, with detect ambush I get an

automatic roll, even in a surprise situation!

Yes, but to get that check you have

to say that you're looking for an ambush!

I always expect an ambush!

You don't always expect an ambush.

How do you ever sleep?

Well, that's beside the point...

I would naturally expect an

ambush in an unfamiliar forest.

Dude, I want my check.

No, you weren't expecting the

ambush when you entred the forest.

therefore, I rule that you

were taken by surprise.

May I continue now?

Yeah.

Unbelivable

19 fricking points.

Maek way for

the Bandit King!

All hail the Bandit King!

Hail! Hail! Hail!

Good day gentlemen.

I am the Bandit King.

This road...

Would you let me

finish his speech first?

Why should I? He's going

to try to kill us.

You don't know that.

Besides, you're still surprised.

Surprise doesn't wear off for 3

rounds and you don't get to attack.

Whatever.

Hey, isn't Mark

supposed to be here?

Uh yeah...

... he's over there.

This road belongs to me

and there's a toll.

See, the Bandit King is

in the employ of...

...The Shadow.

The Shadow?

The Shadow?

The Shadow.

Should you choose to pass peacefully, the

toll is merely all your woridly possessions.

You are seriously pissing me off.

What? Three roads is 15 seconds.

I counted them off.

After 3 rounds, I'm no longer

surprised, so I get the attack.

Yeah right. Ok, well, you

can't attack until I say so.

Dude, it's in the rules.

Here, 15 seconds, uh...

No, We spent most

of that arguing.

You can't attack

until I say so.

Now stop killing him

and let him finish talking.

It's in the rules.

Should you choose to pass peacefully the toll,

is merely all your worldly possessions.

Should you choose to fight?

The toll is you lives.

It's your choice, but I warn

you not to underestimate...

That's it!

Well, the bandits

have a +4 morale.

They also have a +2 terrain

bonus from the forest,

and the ambush.

So, set your to-hit

rolls at a +6.

Do I get the bonus from

the Sword of Ogre Decapitation?

No, actually, that

only works on Ogres.

That's why it's called the

Sword of Ogre Decapitation.

Nice try.

Now begins the killing

followed by a light salad.

Charge!

You're fired!

Alright, so whose initiative is it?

I think it's mine.

Hey guys, am I to late to join?

Mark!

Dude, I'm so glad

you're here.

Thank goodness. We're

getting out asses kicked.

We're in a battle?

Hell yeah!

Am I there?

Yeah.

Where am I?

Right here.

Can I go into

a Berserker Rage?

I go into a

Berserker Rage!

Blood, Death,

and Vengance!

Beautifelly cut, sir Mark

My blades were

thirsty today.

Is the Bandit King

amonh the dead?

No, in fact he's running

away down the path.

Stop him!

Oh. How far

away is he?

About 100 yards.

That's extreme range

even for an elf.

Um, how much

cover does he have?

The forest is a little thicker

around here. It's about 9/10ths.

Don't forget the

-2 wound penalty.

What's your to-hit?

I can only hit

on a 20.

I take the shot.

Booyah!

Masterful shot,

friend elf..

He hadn't the

chance to escape.

Three cheers for the archer!

Hup hup! Hazah! Hup hup! Hazah! Hup hup!

Shut Up!

God damn it! I'm trying to study here!

It's not like I'm asking much!

If you guys don't knock if off,

I'm going to call the f***ing RD.

God, how many times do I have to put

up with that? I cannot believe this! It's sick bullshit!

Maybe we should keep it down.

Prob...probably.

And on that note.

I gotta go.

What? but you just got in the deer!

Why the hell do you have to go?

I promised Molly that I'd take

her out to coffee. You know.

I'll have to take over your character you know.

Yeah I know.

Have fun storming the castle.

Can you belive this?

He's missed the last 3 sessions.

We should kill his character.

Yeah, yeah, kill him. That'll teach

him to interact with females.

Can you belive he would actually rather go

out with a beautiful, intelligent young woman,

than hang out in this ass-smelling

basement with his best friends,

on a Friday night playing adventure

games and having belching contests?

And all for the off

chance he'll score too!

Can you imagine that?

So...we're in

the forest, right?

Uh yeah. the forest.

You follow Brigands Road for a few

hours until the forest swallows the path

and you are again in the wilderness.

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