The Girl Who Invented Kissing Page #2

like somebody lit

a big bone up in here.

- Excuse me?

- You smell that, Phil?

I do.

Hey.

THE GIRL:
Yo, I'll be right out.

You all right in there?

[HAND DRYER BLOWING]

Yep.

You know this girl?

Hey, do me a favor,

not in here with that, okay?

I don't know what

you're talking about, but...

thank you for your kindness.

THE GIRL:
See ya', boys.

JUDY:
Hi, Victor!

- Oh hi, Judy.

- JUDY:
What happened last night?

Heard you had an accident?

VICTOR:
I got pushed.

JUDY:
You got pushed?

It's a long story.

Oh, don't be upset.

I won't bother you about it.

When are you gonna play

your violin for us?

I wanna hear it!

VICTOR:
Yeah, someday.

[BEEPING]

[DOOR BELL RINGING]

[SQUEAKING]

Hey, you wanna see

something funny?

Read this.

If something really big

and scary...

and ugly and hairy...

is following you around

this Halloween,

don't be frightened.

It's just your fat ass!

[CHUCKLES]

Hey, are you following me?

Not that you're big

and hairy and scary.

It's okay. I don't care.

You're not gonna hurt me, right?

No. No, no.

No.

Are you okay?

THE GIRL:
I saw what they did

to you last night.

That was just downright

kinda f***ed up.

They were filming

a John Travolta movie...

but he wasn't there.

Jimmy said they might come back,

but they went back to Hollywood.

So, what's your name?

Victor.

THE GIRL:
Why are you

following me, Victor?

Are you looking for a friend

to hang with?

You don't look like

the kind of person

people should be so mean to.

I'll be your friend, if that

is what you're looking for?

You're very pretty.

I am?

Oh.

Well thank you, Victor.

You're blushing.

I'll... I'll have to remember

this one for next year.

I got plenty of people

I can send that to.

It's just your fat ass!

THE GIRL:
What you got there?

VICTOR:
Oh, that's my violin.

THE GIRL:

Are you going for a lesson?

VICTOR:
Um, no.

THE GIRL:
Are you gonna

play it somewhere?

VICTOR:
No.

THE GIRL:
You just like carrying

it around with you then.

VICTOR:
Yeah, I guess.

THE GIRL:
Something special

you like to have with you.

I get it.

Say, what's your name again?

I don't know,

what do you want it to be?

I don't know.

Maybe when I meet

someone new that I like,

I like them to pick out

a name for me...

and that way...

if it's a name they already like

then they already like me.

It's all right, you don't have

to pick out one now.

You can do it later.

Okay.

Hey, say Victor,

you wouldn't happen to have

a smoke on you, would you?

Oh!

No, I... I don't smoke,

Jimmy smokes.

Who's Jimmy?

Jimmy's my little brother.

He's the one

that yelled at you at The Oak.

That's our tavern, we own it.

- Oh, you don't say?

- Yeah.

It used to be

my dad's a long time ago...

but me and Jimmy,

we work there together.

Actually Victor,

I wouldn't say he yelled at me.

He actually seems like

a nice man, your little bro.

I've never seen you before.

VICTOR:
What street you from?

I'm not from around here.

I'm from all over the place.

I usually just bus it,

and then when I see somewhere

I might like to stay

for a while,

that's where I get off.

Why'd you come off

a bus here in Bloomfield?

I don't know.

I dig the way

this part looked...

like it wasn't anything special

but it wasn't too bad either.

Well, where do you sleep?

Well, last night for instance,

I slept on that park bench

under that pretty tree.

But you don't have any mattress

or any pillow.

No, I don't need none.

I got a blanky in my knapsack,

a change of clothes, a book...

and when I woke up this morning

I was covered

in beautiful yellow leaves.

What?

Huh?

You're weird.

[THE GIRL LAUGHING]

Yeah.

That's right, Victor.

And you wanna know what?

You're pretty weird

yourself, aren't you?

I guess.

Don't let anybody tell you

that's a bad thing,

'cause it's not.

It's a good thing.

It's not?

Only the mediocre are

always at their best...

and I can tell already,

that ain't us.

[STEREO PLAYING]

["BLUE EYES CRYING

IN THE RAIN" PLAYING]

JIMMY:
Vic!

Victor!

Hey, where the hell

were you today?

Didn't I ask you

not to disappear?

I needed your help today?

I was here.

No, no you weren't here.

I called the house six times!

I got a f***ing hernia moving

kegs around all day by myself.

I guess I forgot.

Don't give me you forgot,

because that's bullshit.

Get it outta your head that

I'm just gonna keep taking care

of you for the rest

of your life, because I'm not.

Learn to pull your

own goddamn weight,

and will you turn this sh*t off

for Christ's sakes?

- [DISC SCRATCHING]

- Hey!

JIMMY:
Can't you listen

to something else?

That's all I ever hear.

Hank Snow, Hank Snow!

Who the hell listens

to Hank Snow anyway, you,

- that's who!

- Hank Snow is a legend.

That's Songs of Tragedy.

Oh gee, Songs of Tragedy,

how uplifting.

He's got a f***ing

noose on his album cover!

It's dreary, hillbilly sh*t.

And since when do you

not make your bed?

You're an adult.

You have responsibility.

Sorry, I didn't do it

on purpose.

All right.

Just finish up whatever this is,

and then help me

downstairs with dinner.

I'm going out tonight.

Hey, Jimmy.

You didn't really get

a hernia today, did you?

No...

but I could've.

'Cause I was gonna say,

if you really did get a hernia,

I'm sure Patti could

take care of you.

Patti?

What the hell does that mean?

Who told you that?

Listen,

you don't go saying sh*t,

making up stories,

you understand?

Her and I are good friends,

that's it.

Yeah, but...

No, no, no but.

God forbid somebody hears you,

and get the wrong impression.

I can get in a lot of trouble.

Patti, she's a married woman.

You understand?

Yeah, Jimmy.

But alls I was saying

is that Patti's a nurse.

She could help you.

Oh.

FREDDY:

Where you going big boy?

Hey!

Where you going?

Hey!

Don't come near me!

I'll f***in' jump!

If I could only be so lucky.

One less scumbag off

the f***ing streets.

[RADIO CHATTER]

Come here.

FREDDY:

You dumb motherf***er,

you should've jumped.

Do not f*** with me!

I'll push you!

[SIRENS WAILING]

Cuff him!

- SUSPECT:
I want a lawyer.

- [GROANING]

- ROBERTA:
More tea?

- Hmm.

There you go. Thanks.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

ROBERTA:
Hey, handsome.

How ya doin'?

ROBERTA:
You're late tonight,

baby, are you okay?

Yeah, I'm fine.

Guy steals a car in Belleville

and had to chase him

all the way to Franklin.

Can't f***ing run

like I used to, Roberta,

I'm telling ya'. Smoked.

Franklin, they just paved that.

Must be nice, right?

Yeah, it's beautiful.

[CHUCKLES]

- ROBERTA:
Where's your partner?

- FREDDY:
Jerking off.

[ROBERTA SCOFFS]

NOLAN:

Come on, it's freezing.

FREDDY:
Yeah, I know,

bad guys are still out there.

- ROBERTA:
Um,

- FREDDY:
Yeah?

When I get off at one,

I could use a ride home.

FREDDY:
All right, I'll see

what I can do, all right?

["EVERYBODY ALWAYS LEAVES"

PLAYING]

Sometimes

I can't remember nothing

Sometimes

It shadows everything

Some Sundays

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