The Great Muppet Caper Page #7

Synopsis: Kermit and Fozzie are newspaper reporters sent to London to interview Lady Holiday, a wealthy fashion designer whose priceless diamond necklace is stolen. Kermit meets and falls in love with her secretary, Miss Piggy. The jewel thieves strike again, and this time frame Miss Piggy. It's up to Kermit and Muppets to bring the real culprits to justice.
Director(s): Jim Henson
Production: Universal Pictures
  Nominated for 1 Oscar. Another 1 nomination.
 
IMDB:
7.2
Metacritic:
70
Rotten Tomatoes:
75%
G
Year:
1981
97 min
1,142 Views


- Henderson.

That's it.

That's the name on the slip.

But I hate pepperoni.

I'll eat it!

Stand by, guys.

just one moment.

Can I see that slip?

Actually, this is the wrong slip.

- You said that slip had my name on it.

- That slip?

That slip we left at the home,

but we got the pepperoni.

- But I hate pepperoni.

- Right.

How about you--

You could feed it to the dogs.

Yes, that's right.

Here, sir.

That's very thoughtful of you.

Thank you very much, sir.

What am I,

a glutton for punishment?

How do we get in?

Why don't we just

ring the doorbell?

- There's got to be another way.

- You better think of it pretty quick.

Those dogs

have nearly finished the pizza.

I know. The roof.

Man, no way we'll ever get up there.

So far,

I'm not having any fun.

Let me talk to them.

It helps to know a second language.

It's nearly midnight.

What am I going to do?

Hey, you!

What an unbelievable coincidence.

This window probably has

an alarm system on it.

My assistant Beaker

will check it out.

- But--

- Go on, Beaker.

Very good, Beaker.

Now it's perfectly safe.

- Good. Animal?

- What?

- Do your stuff.

- Yeah.

Sorry.

There it is:

the fabulous Baseball Diamond.

How will we get down there?

I suggest we jump.

Are you crazy?

That's about a hundred feet.

I didn't say it was a good suggestion.

Maybe we can jump partway.

What do we do now?

We'll just have to go down there

and catch those thieves red-handed.

What color are their hands now?

We'll just have to improvise.

We'll make a ladder

out of whatever will hold us.

Good idea.

Here's the paper towels.

I'm coming, Kermy!

You wanted excitement.

Excuse me.

I don't think that belongs to you.

Gung ho!

Say cheese.

Woman!

- Nice catch, Animal.

- Heads up, Lew!

Put it in here now.

Yeah, I got it.

Hot potato! Keep away!

Here we go!

I got it! Thank you.

Be careful, guys.

That's it. Get her!

Still got the good eye!

Welcome to the wild world

of Muppet sports.

This is Louis Kazager

with a play-by-play.

It looks like ladies night

here at the gallery.

Peekaboo!

- Hey, batter!

- Okay here she comes, boy!

Way to duck! Way to look!

Way to move! Yeah! Come on, baby!

- Popcorn! Get your red-hot popcorn!

- Yeah!

- A buck a box.

- Get that ball!

Popcorn, chicken?

Woman!

Lew Zealand leads off the order

as we join the game.

Wow!

Sock it to me, Beaky baby!

Pitch, Beaker.

You couldn't hit

the broadside of a barn!

- Picture of the pitcher!

- Wait for what you want, Lew baby!

- Rah!

- Beaker goes into the windup!

- Batter!

- It's the pitch!

- It's a high fly ball!

- I got it!

- Give me that diamond, you crook!

- What's that, you twit?

- Come on, guys, get him!

- You guys back off!.

But, Nicky,

why are you doing this?

Because I'm a villain.

It's pure and simple.

Excuse me, Mr. Holiday, sir.

Would you let Kermit go?

If you hold him too long,

he'll just give you warts.

No, he's coming with us.

Come on, girls, let's get out of here.

- Watch out!

- Watch it, Piggy!

Bye-bye.

- You were magnificent, Miss Piggy.

- I did it all for you.

- Could I just have a moment with her?

- Thank you.

- I really did care for you.

- I know.

We could have had the world

on a silver platter.

That silver's turned

to iron bars, Nicky.

- Don't hate me, Miss Piggy.

- I don't.

It's just that somehow

along the road...

I found out the difference

between wrong and right.

You're wrong.

He's right.

Would you believe it, Statler?

They're heroes.

- Now they're going to be obnoxious.

- What else is new?

I'd say all's well that ends well.

Doesn't matter to me,

as long as it ends.

It was nice of the Chronicle

to pay for our flight home.

But a man should be treated better

than his luggage.

My luggage was sucked out the door.

Luckily,

my radio is frozen to my wrist.

Okay, guys,

everybody out for the USA.

How close are we?

About 30,000 feet.

- You mean--

- Yep.

Happy landing!

Come on, carrot top.

- We've had comedy

- We've had mystery

Had a real good time

and solved a crime real easily

Hey, a movie

I just can't believe they did it

-Starring everybody

-And me

- There was spectacle

- There was fantasy

- Where we took a chance

-And saw romance end happily

- In a movie

- I just love a happy ending

One for everybody

Everybody in the world

And me

Wait a minute!

Hold it right there.

Don't go home yet.

Say cheese.

I'll send you each a copy.

Rate this script:5.0 / 1 vote

Tom Patchett

Tom Patchett is an American film director, screenwriter, actor and producer who is best known as the co-creator of ALF. He co-wrote the films Up the Academy, The Great Muppet Caper, The Muppets Take Manhattan and Project ALF. He also wrote episodes of The Bob Newhart Show, We've Got Each Other, The Tony Randall Show, The Carol Burnett Show and Buffalo Bill. more…

All Tom Patchett scripts | Tom Patchett Scripts

0 fans

Submitted on August 05, 2018

Discuss this script with the community:

0 Comments

    Translation

    Translate and read this script in other languages:

    Select another language:

    • - Select -
    • 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
    • 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
    • Español (Spanish)
    • Esperanto (Esperanto)
    • 日本語 (Japanese)
    • Português (Portuguese)
    • Deutsch (German)
    • العربية (Arabic)
    • Français (French)
    • Русский (Russian)
    • ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
    • 한국어 (Korean)
    • עברית (Hebrew)
    • Gaeilge (Irish)
    • Українська (Ukrainian)
    • اردو (Urdu)
    • Magyar (Hungarian)
    • मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
    • Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Italiano (Italian)
    • தமிழ் (Tamil)
    • Türkçe (Turkish)
    • తెలుగు (Telugu)
    • ภาษาไทย (Thai)
    • Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
    • Čeština (Czech)
    • Polski (Polish)
    • Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Românește (Romanian)
    • Nederlands (Dutch)
    • Ελληνικά (Greek)
    • Latinum (Latin)
    • Svenska (Swedish)
    • Dansk (Danish)
    • Suomi (Finnish)
    • فارسی (Persian)
    • ייִדיש (Yiddish)
    • հայերեն (Armenian)
    • Norsk (Norwegian)
    • English (English)

    Citation

    Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:

    Style:MLAChicagoAPA

    "The Great Muppet Caper" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 23 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/the_great_muppet_caper_9306>.

    We need you!

    Help us build the largest writers community and scripts collection on the web!

    Watch the movie trailer

    The Great Muppet Caper

    The Studio:

    ScreenWriting Tool

    Write your screenplay and focus on the story with many helpful features.


    Quiz

    Are you a screenwriting master?

    »
    Who is the director of "Avatar"?
    A Peter Jackson
    B James Cameron
    C Quentin Tarantino
    D Steven Spielberg