The Honeymoon Killers Page #2

how sick she is from all that gas.

We can thank our lucky stars

that I got to her in time.

What a story

for the newspapers.

What?

Oh, get away from her.

Leave her alone.

Ray? Um... Oh, no.

That was my new little puppy.

He was jumpin' all over Martha.

I was afraid he was gonna wake her up.

Did I say that?

Oh, well, uh...

I'm just so nervous,

I don't know what I'm sayin'.

Oh, no. She's here

in my apartment, in my bed.

Oh, I wouldn't leave her alone.

I don't know what she'd do.

Oh, no. She-She

can't talk to you.

She's unconscious.

Ray. Ray.

I wanna die.

I wanna die.

I can hear her.

Let me talk to her.

Now, Martha.

Martha, look at me.

It's Bunny.

Bunny.

Ray is on the phone.

No, Ray, she won't

come to the phone.

She says you don't love her

and she wants to die.

She says you'll read about it

in the papers when she kills herself.

Tell her I love her.

Wait a minute, Ray.

He says he loves you.

Ray, I think she'll

come to the phone now.

Hello? Ray?

Darling?

I didn't mean it.

Ray, listen.

You gotta come down here.

If you don't,

I-I'll kill myself. I swear.

Oh, I can't get away

now, sweetheart.

Would you like to come up here

for a little visit?

You crazy little fool.

Now that you know

everything about me...

do you still love me?

Yes.

You would still

commit suicide for me?

Yes.

You don't want to call the police?

You don't want to sue me?

No.

I have to go through

with the marriage to the Acker woman.

Wait until after then.

You've got to go back

to Mobile anyway.

You can't leave your mother

with that woman forever.

- Go back to the hospital.

- How can I...

knowing you're with

another woman?

I won't touch her.

I promise.

I'll get everything from her

before the wedding.

There'll be no honeymoon?

I'll dump her

right away.

It's not like this.

Then you'll come back

to Mobile.

Yes. We'll work

our future out together.

I promise.

All right.

After Mrs. Flynn called to say

you'd gone to New York...

I came in here

to find the assignment chart.

I'm afraid you left some of

your rather torrid correspondence...

with a Mr. Fernandez

in New York.

I think you'd better

take it with you.

I don't think our board of directors

would look kindly...

on our supervisor of nurses

involved in a... lonely hearts scandal.

How dare you

go through my desk!

You ought to be

ashamed of yourself.

I'm not so sure

Hitler wasn't right about you people.

Mrs. Beck,

get out of here...

before I forget

I'm a gentleman.

You bet I'm getting

out of here.

And don't make that check

out to Martha Beck.

Make it out to

Mrs. Raymond Fernandez.

What do you

think I am?

I went to New York

to be married.

Two can live

as cheaply as one, darling.

Let me congratulate

the groom.

Hi. This is Bunny, Ray.

What do you mean stealin'

the best friend a girl ever had?

Yeah. Listen, now that you two

have been spliced, I...

Spliced.

Married, Ray.

Uh-huh. Now, don't you

be a stranger, hear?

Okay. Here she is.

- Hi.

- You told her we're married?

Uh-huh. Mama too.

Jesus, Martha! I go to New Jersey

next week to marry Doris Acker.

How am I going to

bring her back here if you're here?

It's impossible. You know

I've got to continue my business.

Don't worry. I'll think of something.

- Now what's the matter?

- Oh, that's Mama.

She doesn't wanna go

to New York.

Martha, that's completely

out of the question.

I mean it.

Look, you say

you love me. Okay.

That you're going to kill yourself

if you can't come up here. Okay.

But you can't bring

the old lady.

What else am I gonna do with her?

Get rid of her! Choke her! I don't care

what the hell you do with her!

But you can't

bring her up here!

You understand?

Yeah, I understand.

I'll wait outside, Mrs. Fernandez,

while you say good-bye to her.

- I have to go now, Mama.

- Go.

Go!

I never want

to see you again.

- Mama, don't talk like that.

- You're leavin' me here to die.

Now that you have a husband,

you want to be rid of me.

I told you, Mama, I have to find a job

when I get to New York.

Someone has to

look after you.

Don't worry. As soon as Ray and I

are settled, we'll come back for you.

It's a lie.

It's a lie.

You want to be rid of me.

You're diggin' my grave, because you're

killin' me by leaving me here.

You're killin' me!

Good-bye, Mama.

Martha! Don't go.

I'm sorry for what I said.

Take me with you.

I won't be any trouble. I promise you.

Please don't leave me.

I'm afraid, Martha!

Martha, don't go!

It's too bad

when they get senile.

You can begin billing me at the first

of the month at the New York address.

Good-bye.

Goddamn you!

Goddamn you!

I hope you end up

like this!

I hope

someone does this to you!

And so by virtue

of the authority vested in me...

as justice of the peace

of Morris County, New Jersey...

I hereby pronounce you,

Doris Acker...

and you,

Raymond Fer-Fernandez...

man and wife.

You may

kiss the bride.

Aren't you going to

congratulate me too, Mrs. Beck?

- Oh, I think you should call

my sister Martha. - Martha.

Your car drives

very well, Doris.

Our car, darling.

Good-bye, Morristown High School.

See you in the fall.

I can't wait to see

the expression on my kids' faces...

when I tell them.

"Boys and girls,

from now on...

you are to address me

as Mrs. Fernandez."

Did they think you would

stay a spinster forever?

Is there something wrong

with that word, darling?

Oh. My English.

Doesn't that mean "maiden"?

Oh! You are adorable.

I just can't wait

to see our apartment.

O beautiful

For spacious skies

For amber waves

of grain

For purple mountains

majesties

Above the fruited plain

America, America

God shed his grace

on thee

And crown thy good

with brotherhood

Ray? Darling?

Where are you?

In the living room,

Doris.

Bring me a towel,

love.

Are you coming out now?

No. The bride's going

to take a nice soak.

But I miss you, sweetie.

Bring me a towel.

We're married,

you know.

Oh, come on. I've seen it before.

I'll be out

in a little while, lover.

Glory, glory hallelujah

Glory, glory

hallelujah

Glory, glory

hallelujah

His truth

is marching on

Too quick.

Too quick!

- What's too quick? - You shouldn't

have taken her things last night.

You should have left them

to me to do later the way I always do.

And now she wants them back.

She's furious.

Where is she?

In the bedroom.

She's packing.

- Good morning.

- I'm leaving!

Already? That was

a pretty short honeymoon.

Honeymoon? You ought to tell your brother

what's supposed to happen on a honeymoon.

Before I go, I want my rings

and my money belt.

- Your what?

- My two rings...

and my money belt

with the $2,000 in it.

- I don't know what you're talking about.

- Somebody took them.

See here. Do you know what happens

to people who make false accusations?

- They get sued.

- I want my rings and my money!

You lower your voice.

You're not in your classroom now.

You give me back my things,

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes