The Honeymoon Machine Page #6

institute the search.

Just what are you looking for?

Blinking has been

reported, ma'am.

I am searching for a blinker.

Well, you don't have

to search here.

I'm admiral Fitch's daughter.

And I am the secretary of the

Navy's favorite son.

I mean it!

That's just a bedroom in there.

My orders are to

search the premises,

and a bedroom is premises!

Good evening.

Anything I can do for you?

Good evening, lieutenant Howard!

It is indeed a pleasure

to see you again, sir!

I'm afraid I don't

place you, sailor.

Signalman burford Taylor, sir.

Well, the lieutenant

may have forgotten,

but lieutenant was kind enough

to come to my

assistance one night

when 3 army guys jumped

me in a saloon in Tokyo.

- At ease.

- Thank you, sir.

Signalman Taylor is searching

the premises

for a blinker.

Fine. Let him search.

You don't mind, sir?

It's... orders.

Not at all. Go right ahead.

How about a drink?

Drink, sir?

Surely the lieutenant

is not suggesting

that I take a drink

while on duty, sir?

Certainly not.

I was talking

to my friends here.

However, if you should

happen to accept a drink

while my back is turned,

I certainly couldn't

put you on report... could I?

As lieutenant knows,

I am not a drinking man.

Say when, sailor.

When!

I should like

to propose a toast.

To those intrepid men...

Who are we toasting?

You can't toast anyone

without a drink!

Good heavens, man, you picked up

an empty glass!

My friends, a toast

to those intrepid...

Beautiful bourbon, sir.

And if I may say so, sir,

that was the most

beautiful toast.

Thank you... Let's drink to it.

I'll go along with that, sir.

To Julie Fitch,

the admiral's daughter!

She really his daughter?

Certainly.

Wow.

Lieutenant may not know this,

but this is the first liquor

I've touched

since that night in Tokyo.

Very next morning, sir, I went

on the wagon.

Is that so... why?

It was the martians, sir.

They tell me I kept

seeing martians.

Martians?

Men from Mars, ma'am.

They say I saw 'em crawling

all over the ship.

Did you?

Yes, sir.

Doctor thought I might've

been allergic

to that fourth bottle of sake.

Look, maybe this man

better not have any more

to drink.

No, no, perfectly

all right, ma'am.

This isn't sake.

Ohhhh!

Well... How do you like that!

Even in Italy... Green stamps!

And now, with the lieutenant's

very kind permission...

I will go in the blinker

and search for the bedroom, sir.

In the bedroom

and search for the blinker!

As I said, sir.

Right through that door!

Thank you.

First, sir...

A short one for the road, sir.

And I'm off, sir.

Second thought,

why search the bedroom?

United States naval officer

would never hide a blinker...

Would you, sir?

Certainly not.

Certainly not, sir.

So, I will say good night

and leave, sir.

Hey!

Don't let him go!

Ok, grab his belt!

1, 2, 3, heave!

Thank you, sir.

I must've gone through the wrong

door, sir.

Yeah, it seems that way.

Which way?

- It's a blinker!

- Where?

I don't see any blinker!

Someone's been

setting up an air blink.

Spies, sir!

You mean this thing?

That's no blinker.

Sir, I've been

a signalman for 16 years,

and I know a blinker

when I see a blinker...

And that's a blinker!

Damn it, get off there before

you kill yourself!

It's ok, sir!

I'll get it, sir!

It's my duty, sir!

Sailor, you come down here

right now, and that's an order!

Coming, sir!

Aahhhh!

Don't move!

Don't move!

It's all right, sir.

All I gotta do is turn around.

No!

Get around

the other side, quick!

Is everything all right?

Everything's fine!

Take it easy.

Just take it easy!

Don't move.

Would you let go of that thing?

It's evidence, sir!

Evidence of espionage

in this here hotel!

I'll give it to you.

I'll give you the blinker!

Let's get out of here!

I got it, sir!

I'll take that, sailor.

No, sir.

It's much too

heavy for you, sir.

Now, will you hold this

while I fix my pants?

Better watch your step, sir.

All right, now, back inside!

Yes, sir!

And will you stop saluting?

Yes, sir!

They're back, sir!

The martians are back!

The martians are back, sir!

That's not a martian!

They're all over the hotel.

We're surrounded

by martians, sir!

They're not martians.

Look, it's only a statue.

Open your eyes!

It's nothing.

The martians are here!

The martians are...!

What is it, sir?

Now, I could have sworn

I heard someone say that

the martians were...

Don't be a nut!

Just don't look

at them, do you hear?

Don't look at them.

Just keep your eyes closed.

They'll go away.

Ok?

All right.

Come on, be careful.

It's only a few more steps.

Hey, come on.

What's the matter?

Come on!

I think he's asleep!

What? Asleep?

For the love of... Wake him up!

No, no, don't wake him up.

He'll see them again.

Don't wake him up!

What will I do?

Get him a blanket?

We got to wake him.

No, we don't.

Listen, all we have to do is...

I'll get it.

Now, keep your eyes closed

and follow me.

Slowly.

Remember, keep your eyes closed.

No! Take it easy.

Take it ea-ea...

Come on.

Sailor!

Hup, hup.

About face.

Any word on operation 4?

We've searched the hotel from

cellar to roof, sir.

No blinker yet.

Have they all reported in?

All except one, sir.

I can't seem to contact

signalman Taylor.

Keep trying!

Yes, sir!

Operation 4 to signalman Taylor.

Can you read me, Taylor?

Come in Taylor!

Over.

Burford!

This is hermie.

What goes on?

Easy now.

We'll put him on the couch.

The Navy sure feeds him good.

Now I know what they mean,

when they say get the lead out.

Watch it, Pam!

That was captain Adam

from the elmira.

He's on his way

to the suite now, sir.

Good, good.

What?

What, what?

All right.

What do we do now?

I'm thinking. I'm thinking.

One thing's for sure.

We can't go to the casino

and leave this guy here alone.

Maybe we could get

a baby-sitter?

When he wakes up, he'll alert

the entire city of venice.

- Why should he?

- Are you crazy?

He saw the blinker.

What blinker?

There is no blinker.

The blinker is in the canal.

Besides, he won't

even remember it.

Jason, you hold down the fort,

and I'll go to the casino.

No, the time has come,

lieutenant Howard,

to call a halt

to this whole affair.

We stop right now!

Stop?

On the brink of victory?

Julie, have you gone mad?

Did Washington stop

at valley forge?

Did Dewey stop at Manila?

Did Napoleon stop at Waterloo?

You bet he did.

Julie, come.

Julie, things have been so

messed up around here

that I haven't had a chance

to talk to you.

But, I think I love you.

Fergie... I mean it.

You said you discovered

something about me

between the fish

and the souffle.

I discovered something, too.

- When?

- I'm not sure.

I think it was when you let me

go ahead in spite

of your father.

Any girl who would double-cross

her own father,

that's my kind of woman.

Fergie!

No, I didn't mean it that way.

Well, how did you mean it?

Anybody else for post office?

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes