The Horde

Getting chilly out here.

Shall we take

this party inside?

Okay, babe.

Just watch your step,

all right?

That's better.

See?

Isn't this better

than Vegas?

Well, I guess.

Come on, sweetie.

There's no noise,

no traffic.

-No smoke, no...

-no room service.

I'll be your room service.

Wine. Okay.

-Okay.

-One for you.

Okay, okay.

Thank you.

To us.

To us.

Okay, room service.

How about some

cheese and crackers

to go with this wine?

As you wish.

-God.

-Here you go.

Be right back.

Come on, Charlie.

Charlie.

Charlie?

Roar!

You f***ing a**hole.

You shoulda seen your face.

No, this i... this is you.

"Boo."

Charlie!

Charlie! No!

Charlie! Charlie!

Help me, please!

B*tch!

My god!

Please! Somebody help me!

No! No!

Somebody please help me!

Somebody help me.

Welcome to our woods.

THE HORDE:

Okay, guys,

everyone who's going

on our extra credit trip

to the beautiful

sapphire lake,

please stay

for a few minutes.

And everybody else,

you don't know

what you'll be missing.

And don't forget

that your final exam pictures

are due Tuesday morning.

Okay?

Have a good weekend.

Bye.

And we are left...

With us.

Do I really have to go

on this stupid camping trip?

No, Riley,

you can fail the class,

not graduate,

and take it again next year.

What if my dad buys

a new photo lab for campus?

Then you're gonna have

a great place

to retake the class

next semester.

Damn!

She told you, son.

Shut up, Derrick.

It'll be a great chance

to take pics

and enjoy nature.

Yeah, the only nature

you'll be exploring

is each other.

We'll be leaving

bright and early, guys.

So, remember to charge

your camera batteries

and bring

extra memory cards.

Should be nice and warm.

70's all weekend.

Perfect weather

for skinny dipping.

Okay, you skinny dippers.

Don't forget

to bring your clothes.

And bring some snacks

too, all right?

We'll meet in the lot,

and then we'll leave

at 6:
00 A.M. sharp.

Any questions?

Do we get extra credit

for pictures of bigfoot?

Technically,

there's never been

a picture of bigfoot.

All been proven fakes,

like loch ness.

Derrick, if you get

a picture of bigfoot

-I'll give you an a.

-Yes.

All right, guys.

Bright and early we'll see you

in the morning.

So it's 8:
00

this Saturday?

Yes, Mr. crenshaw,

you are all set.

Great, and you got us

a booth by the window

overlooking the water?

She loves the water.

Yes, sir.

It's our best table.

Great. All right,

and it's romantic, right?

Because it's

a special occasion.

I'm sure she'll like it.

It's very romantic.

All right.

Thank you, bye.

What do you think, boy?

You like it?

Not bad?

Yeah.

Selina, there's...

Something I wanted to ask you.

I...

Ever since we...

From the moment

that I-i... Jesus.

What're you doing

for the next 60 years?

How would you

do it, boy?

Yeah, you're a big help.

Could tell you 10 ways

to sink a battleship,

but I can't figure out

how to ask one question.

Hi, babe.

-Hey.

-How are you?

Hi, my little fuzzy bunny.

I missed you.

Did you miss your mommy?

My god.

So, how's my little professor,

good, but I'm tired.

You're tense.

Yeah. That feels

really good.

Just got a lot

going on with school.

I'm grading finals

and doing the schedules

and planning

the extra credit camping trip

this weekend for Saturday.

That's this Saturday?

Yeah. -I thought it

was next Saturday.

No, we had to move it up

because

of everyone's schedules.

Why? What's wrong?

Nothing, I just had

something planned for us.

Wait, what did you

have planned?

Nothing special.

It's all right.

Babe...

Why don't you

come camping with us?

I hear that

the lake is beautiful.

And you love the woods.

Come on, please.

Don't make me beg.

-Sure, it'll be fun.

-Really?

-Yeah.

-My god.

I'm so excited.

Thank you.

I'm gonna go take

a bubble bath,

and then I'm going

to thank you properly.

Can't wait.

Always have a contingency.

Everything's packed

in the car except this.

Thanks, baby.

Okay.

-What's that?

-Well, sweetie,

back in the seals

we called this a gun.

I know it's gun,

you smartass,

-but it stays here.

-Yeah.

You know how I feel

about those things.

Yeah, I know, but I kinda like

to have it with me.

My little seal.

-You're always prepared.

-That's the boy scouts.

Okay, we're going on

a photography

camping trip.

We're not taking out Isis.

You left the seals

a long time ago,

and all those

dangerous missions.

You're not

that guy anymore.

Okay.

Okay.

Is my knife okay?

Can I bring that?

Yes, you can bring

your knife.

I may need you to whittle me

a marshmallow stick.

I'll give you

marshmallow stick.

Come here.

God, I love you.

I love you too.

And thank you

for coming with us.

It really means a lot.

-It'll be fun.

-Yeah.

Come on, let's go.

Okay.

-Thanks for driving, John.

-No problem.

Yeah.

Thanks, Mr. crenshaw.

Not sure my pimp-mobile

would've made it.

Yes, thank you,

Mr. crenshaw.

Hey, did you guys all know

that sapphire lake

is one of the oldest lakes

in the state?

And in the early 1900s,

they built these small

mining towns in the area.

Really? Slugbug red!

How you two

doing back there?

Got enough room?

We're great, thanks.

It's cozy.

How much longer?

About three more hours.

Hey, Mr. crenshaw,

I think you might need

to clean that backseat.

I think I'll be okay.

Guys, call me John.

Okay, John.

How about you, Riley?

You ready to get out there

and get some,

really cool nature shots?

No, I'm not.

I just signed up

for this stupid class

because I needed

three more credits to graduate

and I thought

it would be easy.

Now I'm stuck here

with all of you.

Well, it would be easy

if you got a little creative

and actually did the work.

Whatever.

What kind of car

is this, anyway?

It's a Tahoe.

I think my dad's gardener

drives one of these.

I thought

it would be bigger.

Nice kid.

Can't be without my gun.

Dad, Riley's touching me.

Seriously?

Come on, man.

Lighten up, dude.

What?

What's your problem?

Jeez.

Are we there yet?

Are we close?

We're getting close, guys.

Hey, John, can we stop?

I could use a burger.

Yeah, I'm hungry too.

How about you two

lovebirds back there?

-You guys hungry?

-Yeah.

We could eat.

I'm starved.

Let's eat.

Let's eat, guys.

Yeah.

Babe, are you coming?

Yeah, I just gotta

check on the gear.

I think one of these

tie downs is a little loose.

Okay, I'll see you inside?

Yeah.

You're a soldier?

You're a soldier, right?

Yeah, I was.

Me too.

It's too much war.

Too much.

War everywhere.

There's war here, too.

What do you mean?

War's not always

between two countries.

There are big wars,

and there are little ones

that sneak up on you.

Stab you in the back.

Be careful, soldier.

Yes, sir.

How you doing?

Hey, good.

What can I do for you?

Just a coke.

-Hard stuff?

-I'm driving.

The hell was that?

That was ridiculous.

Yeah, you looked like you

were gonna poop your pants.

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