The King of Marvin Gardens Page #2

- Go around the other way.

- I'm Jason's brother.

I said, go around the back.

What can we do for ya?

Jason said, uh,

that I should only talk to Lewis.

- If that's okay.

- [Phone Ringing]

[Sighs]

[Ringing Stops]

- Have a seat in here anywhere.

- Thank you.

[Door Opens]

- [Door Closes]

- [Men Chattering]

[No Audible Dialogue]

Listen, you don't have to push people.

[Phone Ringing]

[Ringing Continues]

[Chattering Continues]

- Well, can you think of more to service you now?

- [Chuckles]

You know I'm goin' to up and do it for ya.

That's what I'm like.

Well, I just wanted to tell you

how much I appreciate -

Well, how 'bout you just consider

us appreciated... up the ass.

- Yeah, well, you know, man,

I don't like to make trouble -

- You're not in trouble with me.

- I'm not a troublemaker. I just -

- Yeah, I understand.

- I just want to say thank you.

- Okay. I understand.

Thank you. I really mean that.

I don't need thanks,

and I don't want no thanks!

Thanks.

[Door Closes]

You see,

I'm a generous sort of a gentleman.

What's the message?

Well, Jason said

that I should only talk to Lewis.

Gettin' to Lewis is known

to entail additional waiting time.

Well, Jason said that if Lewis knows -

Right there, my boy,

is an accurate summarization.

Jason says and Lewis knows.

[Laughing]

Jason says and Lewis knows.

You want to change seats,

though, go right ahead.

[Chuckling]

Jason says and Lewis -

- [Man Speaking, Indistinct]

- [Rings Once]

[Laughing]

[Door Closes]

- Wave your hands!

- [Chattering]

- Wave your hands!

- [Chattering]

[Cheering]

[Woman]

Gertrude, wait for me!

Wait! Wait for me, Gertrude!

Wait for me!

Well, you already met Sally. Jessica.

Jessica!

This is David.

Hi.

Hello.

There it is, Davey.

It's supposed to be the oldest and finest

accommodations on the boardwalk.

Come on, darlin'. Come on, Jess.

Woodrow Wilson used to stay here.

Did you know that?

Did you know he used to live

up there in Princeton?

Anyway, the island's called Tiki.

It's just seven miles

off the coast of Honolulu.

It's the most fantastic place

I ever saw in my life. Sally?

- Yes, dear?

- Did you remember to pick up

that mail this morning?

[Sally]

I sent Jessie for it.

[Piano, Striking Random Notes]

[Continues]

[Sighs]

Jesus, it's really gonna be good

to talk island again.

Do you know that we haven't

talked island in years?

We haven't talked anything in years.

Well, I know,

but that's what I'm tryin' to get here...

is the Staebler Brothers' renaissance.

I didn't forget, David.

[Piano, Classical]

- How are you tonight?

- Trs bien, monsieur.

- Oh.

- [Continues]

[Chuckling]

Sally, you know, we're not

paying electricity here.

- You can leave some lights burning.

- I did, Jason.

- The bulbs must have blown.

- The last time we had candles.

- How's about some candles?

- Yeah!

- Isnt this romantic?

- Yeah, I love it.

I'm for gettin' violins up here.

Maybe it's the fuse.

I'll call downstairs.

May I talk to Mr. Seymour, please?

- Hey, Sal, bring one of those candles in here.

- Okay.

- I can't see to piss.

- [Chuckling]

Mr. Seymour,

this is Jason Staebler's secretary.

We have no lights in 914.

Would you?

- Please, as soon as possible.

- No, no, no "soon as possible."

Tell the man I want these lights

Thank you very much.

[Chuckles]

[Chuckles]

[Pops Lips]

Blowout.

Black Horse Pike,

right outside Absecon.

This lady, Lucy - real upset...

because she's afraid that

somebody's gonna find us together.

I got nothin' with Lucy.

I don't have the key to Shirley's trunk.

I drive her car all the time,

whenever I want to go someplace...

but I never needed

to get into her trunk before.

[Chuckling]

Now, I'm lookin' around.

Crowbar I find on the floor - backseat.

Pull it out, go outside the car...

and I'm tryin' to...

[Chuckles] pry open her trunk.

All of a sudden,

headlights I'm gettin', right here.

Cops.

I got to admit, let's face it, I look a little

suspicious with a crowbar in my hand...

tryin' to pry open her trunk, not to mention

I got a goddamn woman here - Lucy -

in the front seat tryin' to hide herself

underneath the dashboard.

[Chuckling]

Now I got a cop comin' around...

with a big flashlight here,

lookin' in the trunk.

What have we got there,

behind the spare?

A Kleenex box filled with Swiss watches.

And this b*tch, Shirley...

she's reported that her car

has been stolen.

[Chuckles]

Now, you understand without that...

what you got at the train station is...

celebrity treatment?

You mean you'd have been there

to conduct the orchestra.

[Laughs]

I'd have been there.

Pathetic.

[Chuckling]

Half of 'em don't even know

whether they're standin' or sittin'.

They may wind up sitting on your jury.

Jury? What are you talking about, jury?

I'm telling you the whole charge

is a total charade.

It ain't even gonna get

to the trial stage.

- It's some lunatic who's out in the street -

- [Dog Barking]

totally confused, tryin' to hang my ass

'cause he's got a grudge.

We got apologies in the morning.

- [Barking Continues]

- I was in jail one time, you know, in Cincinnati.

I don't know if you ever heard about that.

I did 60 days.

You wouldn't know what that was like,

but it was really grim, let me tell you.

We've all done our time, Jason.

- [Barking Continues]

- [Elevator Bell Dings]

Isnt she beautiful?

So beautiful.

What do you think, David?

Miss America?

Sure, darlin'. We'll bring her back

next summer as Miss Hawaii.

How's that? In the meantime,

let us formulate some plans here.

You notice how it's not on most maps?

It's just a dot here.

But it's paradise.

A kingdom.

Staebleravia.

- "Staebleravia"! Ya-hoo.

- [Jessica Chuckling]

I thought it was called Tiki.

We're gonna get to rename it next month.

- You can consider that your department.

- Who'd build a resort like this?

Don Dimbleby.

Have you ever heard of him?

I call him "Dimblewit."

[Chuckles]

You understand, this is a man

who inherited his daddy's entire fortune.

Then he pours six million clams

into my little island...

before he bothers to clear

his gambling license.

Now, in an operation this large...

the casino is the name of the game.

I mean, that's where you stand or fall.

But Dimblewit, now, you see, he thinks

that he can do it without politicians.

- [Radio:
Soft Jazz]

- And you never can.

You never can.

[Sally]

Let's try something new tonight, yes?

Come here. Let me help you.

Lewis -

He was the one taught me that.

Jason? Look, honey.

Which do you like better?

Up, like this...

or down?

If Donald Dimbleby couldn't get

a gambling license, how can you, Jason?

He could have got one, all right.

See, he just insulted the wrong people.

Now, I've done business

with the man, and -

[Chuckling]

he's no diplomat.

And you can run a place this big?

I don't know.

And I'm not gonna try and con ya.

I can only tell you,

for the last 10 years...

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