The Lady Vanishes Page #2

with laughter on their lips

and music in their hearts.

lt's not reflected in their politics.

You shouldn't judge

any country by its politics.

We English are quite honest by

nature. You'll excuse me if l run away?

-Good night, good night.

-Good night.

Queer sort of bird.

-Trifle whimsical, l thought.

-After 6 years, we'd be whimsical.

l don't think so. She was very decent

about that cheese.

l see she's finished

the pickles.

Good night, lris. Listen,

someone's serenading.

Let him. Nothing will keep me

awake tonight. Good night.

-What's happening? An earthquake?

-That wouldn't account for the music.

-What a noise. What can they be doing?

-l don't know but l'll soon find out.

Hello.

Musical country this.

l feel quite sorry for that poor singer

outside having to compete with this.

Boris?

Miss Henderson speaking.

Someone upstairs is playing

musical chairs with an elephant.

Move one of them out.

l need to sleep.

-That'll settle it.

-Thank you.

Some people have no consideration,

which makes life more difficult.

Don't you think?

Good night.

You'll be going back

in the morning?

l hope we shall meet again

under quieter circumstances.

-Good night.

-Good night.

Miss, please,

l'll fix everything.

You'd better.

Hold it.

Splendid, don't move.

-lf you please, sir.

-Get out!

One, two.

Please, sir,

will you kindly stop?

They are all complaining in the whole

hotel. You make too much noise.

-Too much what?

-Too much noise.

You dare to call it noise.

The ancient music...

with which your ancestors celebrated

every wedd for countless generations.

What they danced when your

father married your mother...

if you were born in wedlock,

which l doubt. Look at them.

-You are the manager?

-Sure...

l am accustomed to squalor.

Who's complaining?

The young English

lady underneath.

Tell her that l am putting on record

for the benefit of mankind...

one of the lost folk dances

of Central Europe...

and she does not own

the hotel. Get out!

Now, one, two...

He said:
''ls she the Queen of Sheeba?

She thinks she owns the hotel.''

-Can't you get rid of him?

-lmpossible.

Are you sure?

l begin to wonder...

lt's coming back to me.

l have got an idea.

The German lady

will call him and say:

''lt is my room. l did pay for it.

Get out quickly.'' How's that?

Good enough.

We will inject him with a little... He'll

never forget as long as he lives.

Nothing but baseball. Children play

it with a rubber ball and a stick.

Not a word about cricket.

Americans have

no sense of proportion.

Come in.

Can't stand this ridiculous

lack of privacy. Lock the door.

Who are you?

What do you want?

-Recognise the signature tune?

-Will you please get out?

This is a much better room.

Definitely an acceptable room.

What exactly do you think you're

doing? Keep away!

Would you hold these

for a minute?

Put those back at once.

-Which side do you like to sleep?

-Do you want me to throw you out?

ln that case,

l'll sleep in the middle.

Smart of you

to bribe the manager.

An eye for an eye and a tooth

for a toothbrush.

-You're behaving like a complete cad.

-You're at liberty to sleep in the corridor.

Hello.

l shouldn't if l were you. l'd only

tell everyone you invited me here.

And when l say everyone, l mean

everyone. l have a powerful voice.

Come out of there at once!

Not until you bribe the manager

to restore me to my attic.

Come out!

Boris? l might change

my mind about the room upstairs.

Have my things

taken upstairs, will you?

You're the most contemptible person

l've ever met in my life!

l think you're a bit

of a stinker, too.

lf we get to Basle in time,

we should see the match.

Hope the weather's like this in

Manchester. Perfect for cricket.

lsn't it somewhere along here?

lf you don't hurry, Margaret, we shan't

get that compartment to ourselves.

Does it matter?

There's time

to change your mind.

Send Charles a telegram

and tell him he's all washed up.

This time next week, l shall be a

slightly sunburnt offering on an altar.

l shan't mind, really.

Good morning. l can't find my bag.

lt's a brown hold-all.

Have you seen it?

No, of course not, thank you.

She's dropped her glasses.

-You dropped your glasses.

-Thank you...

Oh dear! Oh dear!

-Are you hurt?

-l don't know. What was it?

Never mind. This cockeyed station

has practically brained my friend.

-Yes, indeed.

-What are you going to do?

-He can't hold the train.

-l like that!

-Hurry up. lt's going.

-l'm all right.

-Are you sure?

-Don't worry...

l'll look after her.

Such carelessness.

-Are you sure you're all right?

-Send us the Times.

-Write and tell us all about it.

-Good luck. Look after yourself.

You'll be all right in a minute.

Just take everything quietly.

Put this eau de cologne

on your head.

-Do you feel any better?

-Yes, thank you. l'm all right.

What you need is a good strong cup

of tea. l'll ring for the attendant.

No, please, don't bother. l'll go to the

dining car myself. l need some air.

-l'll come with you, if you don't mind.

-No, of course not.

l beg your pardon.

l'm so sorry.

You can always tell a honeymoon

couple. They're so shy.

-Why did you do that?

-We don't want people staring.

You'd think the whole legal

profession was after you.

One would be enough.

You thought that beggar in

Damascus was a barrister.

l just said he looked like

a judge.

You hurried off

in the opposite direction.

That's not true. l was looking

for a street called ''Straight''.

-You weren't so careful at first.

-l know.

And what about me? Robert thinks

l'm cruising with Mother.

lf one is feeling shaky, it's best to

sit in the middle of the coach...

facing the engine.

-A pot of tea, please.

-Very good.

And just a minute.

Will you please tell them to make it

from this? l don't drink any other.

And make sure the water is

really boiling. Do you understand?

lt's a little fad of mine. My dear father

and mother, who are still alive...

and enjoying good health, drink it

and so l follow their footsteps.

A million Mexicans drink it. At least

that's what it says on the packet.

lt's very kind of you

to help me.

l don't think

we've introduced ourselves.

My name's lris Henderson,

l'm going home to be married.

How very exciting.

l do hope you'll be happy.

-Thank you.

-You'll have children, won't you?

They make such a difference. l always

think it's being with kiddies so much...

that's made me so young for my age.

l'm a governess. My name's Froy.

-Did you say Freud?

-No. O-Y, not E-U-D. Froy.

l'm sorry l can't hear.

Froy. lt rhymes with joy.

Thank you. Please reserve two places

for lunch, if you'd care to join me.

lt wasn't out. But for the umpire's

blunder he'd still be batting.

-What do you mean?

-l'll show you. l saw the whole thing.

There's Hammond, there's the bowler,

and there's the umpire.

-Sugar?

-Two please.

Dear me.

There's no sugar.

Now watch this very carefully.

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