The Ledge Page #6

and then I'm gonna go see

the pastor in the morning.

- Come by after.

Let me know how it went.

- I love you.

- Crescent Riverview.

- Hi.

I'd like a room, please.

- When would it be for?

- Tonight, if you've got one.

Come on in.

Would you mind if we talked?

- Oh-

- Please, it's important.

Sit down.

You know what the difference is

between you and me, Gavin?

- No.

- There are two differences.

First of all, you don't see

the world as it is.

This world

is a disgusting place.

I know this because I've seen

some of the worst

it has to offer.

- I find that hard to believe.

- Did you know

I was married before?

- No, I didn't know that, Joe.

- Mm-hmm.

A lovely wife,

two beautiful children,

great home.

But I couldn't stay home,

because I was drawn to sin.

I'd go out for a drink,

and five hours later,

I'd be coked out of my head

and in a booth in a porno shop,

or I'd get a hooker,

or I'd go-go gambling,

or pretty much whatever

you can imagine, I did.

And I lost it all.

My wife left me.

She caught diseases from me.

I lost my job.

I lost my children.

But even still, I couldn't stop.

I mean, so what do you think

that is?

You think

I'm, like, a sex addict

or a junkie

or a gambling addict,

alcoholic?

What?

- I don't know, Joe.

I have no idea.

- The answer

is none of the above.

I just had to have sensation.

I had to feel alive,

because inside, I was dying.

Spiritually, right?

I was lost.

See, I was, you know,

half an inch from death

when Jesus came to me.

I was.

I was lying in the gutter

and got up,

stumbled into a church,

and I was born again.

I was saved.

I was a new man.

The joy-the relief, really...

You have no idea how that feels.

About a year later,

the Lord, having given me

so much already,

He gave me Shana.

He brought her into the church.

And the moment that I saw her,

I knew that I loved her.

Then we were married

in His sight,

in His house.

And loving her was the-

It was such a pure love.

Until two nights ago.

When you were...

f***ing her in your kitchen,

I was outside the door,

listening.

And I thought

of smashing down that door

and killing you both.

But I just ran away.

I ran away, and I did things

that I have not done

in a long time.

And when I came home,

she was asleep in there.

And I watched her lying there.

And she was smiling.

It's hard when we lose

someone we love,

isn't it?

- Yes, it is.

- So I came in here,

and I opened up the Bible.

And I read Psalm 23.

"The Lord is my shepherd.

I shall not want.

"Yea, though I walk through the

valley of the shadow of death,

"I will fear no evil,

for thou art with me.

Thy rod and thy staff,

they comfort me."

And I took this gun,

and I put it right here.

Now...

You think I'm still here

because I was afraid?

- I don't know, Joe.

- No.

I have no fear, Gavin.

You ever been

totally without fear?

- No.

- That's the second difference

between us.

I have the courage

to die for my beliefs

because I know where I'm going.

You have the courage

to die for your beliefs?

- I guess so, you know,

if I had to.

- I don't think you do.

But I figured out

I was the last person

that should die.

- Joe.

Read the marked passage.

- "The man

that committeth adultery

"with another man's wife,

the adulterer and the adulteress

shall surely be put to death."

But, Joe,

what about the New Testament?

Doesn't Jesus say

about an adulteress,

"He who is without sin

amongst you,

let him cast a stone at her?"

- That's right, and no one did,

because no one was without sin.

And Jesus said to the woman,

"Neither do I condemn thee.

Now go and sin no more."

- Right.

- Are you prepared

to sin no more?

Is Shana?

I am washed, sanctified,

and justified.

And if I say

I'm gonna do something,

you better believe I will.

Get out.

- Listen, Gavin.

For God's sake,

just come in here.

I promise I can help you.

- You think I want this, man?

- We just got five minutes left.

Please let me...

Excuse me.

If you were gonna kill someone

that had an affair

with your wife

and you were doing it this way,

what would you want?

- Gavin!

Get down from there, man!

- I'd want to watch him.

- Me too.

I think I just saw something

on the ninth floor

at the Crescent Hotel.

- What are you doing?

- Look, for God's sake, Gavin,

please just come in here.

Let me help you.

- There's nothing you can do.

- Hi. This is Shana.

Please leave a message.

Beep!

- F***.

Shana.

- You know how I said

I had the courage

to die for my beliefs

but you didn't?

- Yeah.

- You disagreed.

- Yeah.

- You still think you have

the courage?

- Yeah, Joe,

but what does that matter?

- Yeah, will let me tell you

what the situation is here,

Gavin.

See, I've decided I'm more

of an Old Testament sort of guy.

But I am willing to compromise.

Only one of you

has to die today.

I have Shana

right in front of me,

and I have my gun

pointed at her head.

- Listen, Joe, whatever-

- Stop.

Stop.

Go to the Tamlacker Building.

There's a door around back.

Take the staircase

all the way up to the top.

On the roof,

you'll find a utility shed.

You get on the ledge

in front of it.

You stand there and think.

At noon, you jump,

or I put a bullet in her head.

Maybe you'll find God.

- What in the hell

is wrong with you?

Don't you realize if you had

told me this from the start,

I could've found him?

I could've done something.

- He would've killed her.

- How do you know he's even

capable of killing her?

You don't even know

what you're capable of.

I mean, would you kill your mom

in order to save your father

or kill one of your kids

in order to save another kid?

These are things

that we cannot know.

- I know what he's capable of,

Hollis.

I saw it in his eyes.

- Look, man, I am not gonna

blow smoke up your ass.

You are in a terrible dilemma.

But I swear to you,

if I was in your place-

- Who do your kids

think their dad is?

- Gavin-

- You get over it for them.

- Gavin, please.

Please just come in here-

- Where's your faith now?

Your wife says she loves you

and she did this for you, right?

- Why can't you have faith

in that?

- Why don't you just mind

your own f***in' business?

Listen, man,

if you do this to me,

I'm gonna carry this sh*t

the rest of my life.

- Not if you do

what I want you to do.

- Tell Shana-

- I will not do it.

I will not do it.

If you got somethin'

that you need to tell her,

you climb your ass in here,

you tell her yourself!

You're always so rational.

I mean, does this sound

rational to you?

- Whoa! Get out of here!

- I mean, think about it.

What makes her life

more valuable than yours?

Please.

Gavin.

Just come here.

Just come here, man.

Now, Gavin, please.

Gavin, please come here.

Just come here, man.

- Look, I feel like

I've gotten to know you.

And I like you, and I'm sorry

I'm gonna have to do this.

- Please.

- But if you were standing

where I am

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