The Lifeguard

1

See you monday.

Where are you going now?

I'm going home.

No.

Yeah.

What did it sMell like?

Animal. Meat.

My boss, he call over here.

Nothing.

Neighbor said,

"I can hear the sound...

this animal."

Handcuff.

Like, in jail?

They shackled him

to the radiator?

Look.

It's just a baby too.

Not full-grown.

Trying to get out.

It's not our fault, the tiger.

You write that, right?

Uh...

Sorry. I just...

I need some air.

This is no kind of thing.

I don't want to hide.

They're little.

They're buried stories,

I guess,

but... They're yours,

so you get attached.

It's not offbeat.

It's news,

and if you put it

in offbeat,

it makes it...

it makes it sound

like a joke.

This is a really

good story, Raj.

Look, relax, Leigh.

Hey! Thank you.

We're very happy.

She was very happy.

Well, about time

I manned up, right?

To the tiger.

May the road rise.

May the tiger...

don't say anything

about the tiger.

May the tiger run free

in tiger heaven...

Where the steaks

are plentiful...

And there's

a lot of tree stumps

for scratching.

Come Back

Meet me at the lakefront

He Says, "Hey,

We're all waiting there"

Tiff Is Coming Too

But That Bith Is always late

Donny And his slutty girlfrien

Heidi And Her Sister, Yeah

Says We'll Smoken An apple

I Say I'm Not A Girl Scout

Do You Know How

How To Get Me There?

Make Me Forget

Fall is in the air

Come On, Last Forever

We Won't Last Forever

Mom Is Calling Us,

But we're still high

Still High For Now

Uh-oh, Uh-oh, Oh

Still High For Now

Uh-oh, Uh-oh, Oh

He Says, "Don't you ever stop

I Say, "We're Raindrs

In the sun"

Still High For Now

Uh-oh, Uh-oh, Oh

Still High For Now

Uh-oh, Uh-oh

Still High For Now

Still High For now

Uh-oh, Uh-oh, Oh

Well, I...

here you go, moose.

Go on, bud.

Are you sure about the...

why did you bring your cat?

Because I couldn't leave him?

Well, couldn't you have

a friend look in on him or...

look in on him?

Uh-huh.

Mom. I'm calling peta.

Well, we don't have

a litter box, so...

mom?

Yeah?

What? No, no, no!

Don't move anything!

There's an order

to all of this.

Okay.

Okay.

Are you stripping?

No.

Are you sure?

It's belly dancing.

I started a new class.

I... I have four students.

And is this the name

that you chose?

"Dance mamas"?

- Really?

- yeah. Ha, ha, ha.

I happen to like the name.

Please, just don't

mess anything up.

- I'm trying to

start a business.

- oh. Can I keep this?

- Hi! Hi!

- there she is. Hi, baby.

Oh, give me a hug!

Oh, my god. Oh, my god.

I wanna move back in

with you guys.

Honey, you're 30 years old.

I'm 29. I'm 29.

And 10 months.

I've never, you know,

asked for...

I just need some time out

of my life.

Well, we all do.

Are you all right, Leigh?

Yeah.

I just don't want to turn 30...

And still be

in that life anymore.

Well, what's wrong

with the life you have

in the city?

It's not...

it's not good.

I mean, I'm not...

I'm not happy.

You're depressed?

Is that it?

Are you depressed?

No. Not c... clinically.

My life hasn't turned out

like I pictured.

Well...

well. It's just nice

to have you here.

Okay?

If you're gonna stay here,

you have to contribute.

To what?

Okay.

Of course.

I would... I would say

you both have

a very keen eye...

Because this painting

represents...

A very small percentage

of what he produced.

And this is a happier piece...

um, this is one

of the happier pieces.

Um, but there's a...

if I'm gone for 30 minutes, nobody notices.

Nobody even cares.

This is your ideal job.

How long are you here for?

I think a while.

Like... A while.

Why?

I'm getting back

to basics.

What about your job?

Yeah.

No.

What about your boss?

He...

um, that guy's engaged.

Leigh-Leigh.

Why are you just standing here?

I need you

to cancel your plans

with anyone else ever.

Okay.

Have you seen Mel?

No. Why?

You should probably

see Mel.

I'm home!

No. You guys can talk.

Sorry. I'm gonna...

I'm here, but I'm...

I'll close...

Get Back To The Island

Get Back To The Rain

Get Back To The Start

So We Can Do It Again

Snuffed By The Sunshine

Covered In Gray

Get Back To The Sun

So we can feel it again

I saw Todd.

I know. I can't...

thirty, still in the closet.

Seriously?

It's like...

hey, do you still smoke?

I'm not supposed to.

What, are they bad for you?

Um... well...

No, we're trying

to get pregnant.

Like, with a human baby?

Mm-hmm.

But it's been

about six months,

and there's just...

Nothing happening.

It'll happen.

It'll happen.

So you don't... no.

Yes. Yes.

I will.

All right.

Don't tell John.

Okay.

Oh, sh*t. Can anyone

see me, do you think?

Mmm. Maybe.

Well, then we should go.

Wow.

Teen mom.

Place Me

In the shadow of your love

Like An Alley Cat Aroused

I Believe We've Had Enough

Hey, Hey, Hey

Place Me

In the shadow of your love

I have a plan.

- You have a plan?

- a good plan.

I'm gonna lifeguard.

What?

- She was a lifeguard

in high school.

- and college.

- Where?

- fox crest condo complex.

It's really good money.

It's good money?

How much?

Wait. Can I...

hold on.

I'm sorry.

Can I just say, what the hell

are you talking about?

You realize that minimum wage

is 8.25 now, so that's...

that's not exactly...

You're not going to have

your high school job. You have

a college degree, and you're 30.

I'm 29.

Todd, I'm 29.

That's a fact.

Hey, hey, hey.

Todd, can I have...

thank you.

Can you please not do that?

Come on.

It's one drag, John.

Fine. Okay?

I got a question

for you, Leigh.

You think these guys

are gigantic losers...

Because they've never

left ridgefield?

I mean, I don't think that.

I'm just asking, you know...

- that's a really judgmental question.

- yeah.

Well, Leigh's cosmopolitan

now, and she understands

this kind of thing.

- What do you think?

- definitely. Absolutely.

- See?

- honestly, I do.

It's a sweet job.

You do nothing.

You do nothing.

But in my field of expertise.

Do you remember that red

one-piece bathing suit

she used to wear?

- She looked like

a swiss army knife.

- you guys could come visit!

- Are you having a nervous breakdown, Leigh?

- John.

- What?

- what? I'm kidding.

Jesus.

Is this parking lot

passed down in the DN.A.

Of skaters?

Like a geese migratory path?

- Look at us.

- that's true. John.

Yes?

You don't know this,

but...

This parking lot,

this very place...

it was like the beating heart

of our high school social life.

This was it.

We used to come here

every night.

Then we'd try and think

of what we were gonna do

that night.

But really we would just

end up standing around

the parking lot.

Oh, yeah?

Like making out and stuff?

- More than that.

- - I'm sure.

I'm pretty sure

I opened the back hatch

of someone's...

No, no, no, no, no.

of someone's...

I'm sorry that I brought it up.

Who was it in the back?

- Come on, please.

- stop it.

Can you not...

stop it.

Well, despite our elderliness,

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