The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner Page #8

bed and breakfast or full board?

Come on, I need more than this,

I'm a growing lad.

Screw your nut, will you?

You'll get me in a bother.

Look, here comes Flash Smith.

Hey, you'd better drop back, mate.

This guy's the daddy.

- That's me dinner!

- Shush, mush, it's Daddy Smith.

Come on, break it up. Keep moving!

- Give him another.

- Keep it moving!

What's this?

Sit over here with me.

- How did you get here?

- Oh, I got caught nicking a car.

Kicked a copper.

Gladys was put on probation.

Hard luck.

- How's Audrey?

- She's all right.

She'd like to hear from you.

- She can't wait till you get out.

- Well, neither can I.

- Notice a funny kind of smell?

- Horrible smell.

Wouldn't be you by any chance, would it?

If it is, we'll have to get you

cleaned up a bit, won't we?

Hey, lay off him.

He's a friend of mine from home.

I thought I could smell Nottingham.

Stinks worse than Liverpool.

- I said knock it off, didn't I?

- I can take care of myself.

- Sure you can, that's why you're here.

- It were bad luck, that's all.

Your mate's king of this Borstal,

you know?

- How do you mean?

- Well, he's a great sportsman.

Yeah, goes like a bleeding greyhound,

does old Smudgey.

That's the Governor. He's got me on this

long-distance running kick.

- What?

- Yeah,

racing against a bunch of berks

from a public school.

Turning me up like a race horse.

Only I don't get so well looked after

as a race horse, is the only thing.

He wants me to be a professional runner.

I'm pleased to work for money.

For a bob a puff, rising to a guinea a gasp,

and retiring with an old-age pension at 32.

Yeah, but just think, though.

Think of that load of cake.

You'll have a great big Jaguar,

and a fancy tart

answering your fan letters.

Think of it, Smudge,

mobbed in the streets.

Not this one.

Who's bloody side are you on

all of a sudden?

He's the Governor's blue-eyed boy now.

- Headmaster.

- Hello, hello.

I believe you know the chairman

of our Board of Governors.

- Of course.

- Yes, indeed, indeed.

Right, then,

I'll go and have a word with my boys.

- Well, I'll see you presently.

- Yes.

Right.

- I say, this is good of you to come.

- Oh, not at all.

My spies tell me

you have a champion running.

I think so.

We're hoping he'll take away

that long-distance challenge cup from you.

Between you and me,

I rather hope he does.

- Very generous of you, Peter, old boy.

- Oh, not at all.

I know how much it means to you.

Come along

and have a glass of sherry, will you?

Good idea.

Now, listen, you lot,

you'd better not let me down today.

I don't want any bloody messing about.

- Oh, hello.

- How do you do?

- My name's Mr. Craig.

- Mr. Scott. Pleased to meet you.

- Your boys take the pegs this side.

- Right, thank you.

This way, fellas.

- Hello, fellas, nice to see you.

- Hello.

- Hi.

- Heya.

- Hiya, fellas.

- How you do?

Hello.

- What's this joint like?

- Bloody awful.

- It can't be worse than ours.

- Do you wanna bet?

- How about your nosh?

- Pardon?

- Food. Grub.

- Oh, pretty dreary.

Oh, we do have a lot in common,

don't we?

Yes, we ought to get together

and join forces.

Yeah, that's an idea. Bit of a revolution.

Go on, Castro. Have a go.

- Very good.

- Hey, you haven't got a burn, have you?

- A burn?

- Yeah, a fag, you know.

No, sorry, we're not allowed to smoke.

- Yeah, what happens if you're caught?

- We get beaten on the backside.

- Do you pay to go to this school?

- Well, our parents do.

Stone me.

- Are the staff here tough?

- The screws?

Yeah, they think they are,

but we can handle them.

Yeah, we've got the skids on them,

all right.

- Who's the opposition here today?

- Why, china over there.

Good luck then.

Oh, ta. Good luck to you.

You're gonna need it, mate.

You haven't got a chance.

Come along, lads. Here we go.

- After you.

- No, after you.

Okay, come on.

Sure you don't want to lock

your gear up before you go, fellas?

Good afternoon. Good luck.

Jolly good luck to you boys. Good luck.

Jolly good luck, chaps.

Good luck to you, boys.

Oh, now, you're the one

we've got to watch out for from Ranley?

- Yes, sir. Thank you.

- Good luck.

Good luck. Good luck.

Good luck to you.

- Jolly good luck.

- Oh, this is Smith, sir,

I was telling you about him.

I've been hearing great things of you.

- Out to beat Ranley school, are you?

- Oh, we'll do our best, sir.

That's the idea.

Yes, well, we're counting on you, Smith.

Well, on all of you.

Shall we go on, sir.

Now, Roach, you take over, will you?

I have a bet on number seven, Gunthorpe.

My son, Willy, tells me

he's the best runner in their school.

I hope you're a good loser, Colonel.

As soon as you're ready, Roach.

All right, boys,

take your positions on the start!

- Who do you fancy?

- Number 14.

Smith? Rather disloyal to Willy, isn't it?

It's Willy I'm thinking of.

If our son doesn't pull out of

that ghastly Chelsea set he's in with,

that's where you and I will be next year.

Ladies and gentlemen,

this is a five-mile cross-country event

between Ranley school

and Ruxton Towers.

You ready, lads? On your positions.

Keep those knees up there.

Come on, Smith, higher up.

Well, when the day comes for you to say

goodbye to Ruxton Towers,

you may find you've a great future

ahead of you as an athlete.

If you put your heart into it.

Great big Jaguar, and a fancy tart

answering your fan letters.

Mobbed in the streets.

If you'll play ball with us...

Thieving young bastard.

...we'll play ball with you.

How do you mean?

Goes like a bleeding greyhound,

that old Smudge.

Your mate's king of this Borstal,

you know.

Athletics, sports.

Where the bloody hell have you been?

Johnny kicked me.

- Oh, shut up, you big fat...

- Hey, that's enough!

He goes after girls! He goes after girls!

Stop that for a start.

- I'm not taking any pills either.

- Shut up, you.

Everything in this house belongs to me,

so just get that straight.

He wants teaching a bloody lesson,

that one.

He'll learn.

They should be half way round by now.

It's my ambition to see you take that

challenge cup from Ranley school for us.

- Keep back, Smith.

- Slow the bastard down.

You think you're clever, don't you?

Tell me where that money is.

I'll get you off on probation.

You his father?

Tell me where that money is.

What's the first thing you'd do

if you won 75,000 quid?

Girl.

I can't understand why you're always

trying to run away from things.

Why? Why, then?

There they are,

coming over the top of the hill.

Yes, someone's coming over

the top of the hill now.

We can't see who it is yet.

Is it gonna be Ranley school,

or is it Ruxton? It's Smith!

- Looks like your man.

- The cup's ours!

...he's well in the lead.

Oh, it's a wonderful lead.

It's an easy win for Ruxton Towers.

I can't see who it is yet behind him.

Wait a minute. It's number seven.

Number seven is Gunthorpe.

I'm afraid your chap hasn't a hope

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