The Look of Love Page #6

Go have fun with your

four-year-old friends.

- And you're just being an old man.

- Yeah, and you've made me an old man.

All of us are in the gutter.

But some of us are looking at the stars.

Wow.

That was Oscar Wilde,

by the way, said that.

I know.

Well, I don't mind

pushing the envelope,

you know, taking a risk.

I don't want to show too much pink.

Of course. It's gonna be classy.

- No penetration.

- No, no, no, no. No, no. No.

- If it's interesting we can give it a...

- "Interesting"?

This is an opportunity

for us to re-write

the cultural history of this nation.

And these girls are

prepared to do that?

Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah.

Okay, a bit too much tease.

Let's take 'em down. Down.

That's good, that's it.

Back against the wall.

I want to see something.

I don't want to think

I might be seeing something.

I want to see it.

Lovely, that's great. That's good.

If you come... Yeah. That's it.

No, that's good.

That's it. This isn't...

It's not Germany. So we'll just...

That's it, that's it. Beautiful.

Look at that. I f***ing love this girl.

We've got to use her again,

she's amazing.

- Can I have a look, please?

- Yes, please do.

- I'm very worried about this.

- Oh, Paul.

Are we going to run into

problems with that?

- No...

- I think we are going to

run into severe problems

with half of these images, I'd say.

- Yes.

- Why?

She's got her bum

in your face here.

You can see her bum-hole here.

Right in your face.

And, you know, I can't see

her middle finger there.

So men are just gonna assume

that's inside her.

- That's obscene.

- Really?

- Well, it's not in her fanny.

- I don't... I don't remember that.

Do we need to take

these kind of risks?

- Yes!

- On the day it wasn't inside her.

No, it's definitely not inside her.

Not during the shoot, anyway.

I think we have to ask ourselves

if we're pornographers or not.

With all due respect,

I do not publish, uh, pornography.

I, earlier today, obtained

these Scandinavian publications

from, uh, a Soho outlet.

Now these are what

I call pornography.

Hstspela, for example,

which, you know,

is literally "Horseplay"

in, um... Scandinavian.

And, by the way,

this is not your common or garden

equestrian publication,

I can assure you of that. Um...

The Obscene Publications Squad today

impounded more than 300, 000 copies

of Paul Raymond's magazine Men Only.

It's the largest amount of pornography

ever seized in Britain.

Tony, I think you should

let me go first.

Ah, you'll only depress him, Carl.

It'd be better if you let me

do the talking.

- Paul.

- Paul.

Those joyless, puritanical bastards.

Yeah, I know.

You know, they're the Roundheads

and we're the Cavaliers.

Yeah, who won?

It's as if masturbation

doesn't exist.

Think of one person who you can say

has never had a wank.

- Mother Teresa?

- All right, name me another person.

- Gandhi.

- Come on.

Oh, Jenny, it's all right,

I'll get it.

- You sure?

- Absolutely.

Darryl. Pleased to meet you.

Come in.

So you found us all right?

Yeah, I jumped in a

black cab at Euston.

I'm here on business as well

as seeing you, you know.

Oh, right. What kind of business?

Uh, it's a job interview, yeah.

Right, very good.

I like your flat.

It's like something

out of James Bond.

It is a bit.

Yeah, what's the... what's the

guy called? Dr No. It's like, yeah.

Yes, but it's a...

I don't have the white cat, I'm afraid.

Yes. Uh, Ringo helped me

design it, actually.

Ringo Starr from the Beatles.

- Oh, you know him?

- Well, I know all the Beatles.

Very friendly with them,

apart from Yoko.

Now, Darryl, can I offer you

a glass of champagne?

It's a very, very nice bottle.

Yeah, I've had it before.

And by the way,

it's not Darryl, it's Derry.

Okay, well, Derry it is.

I changed my name many years ago.

I used to be called Geoffrey.

- Geoffrey.

- Yes.

It's really nice.

You know, for years I'd tell people

that you were dead.

That's what Mum...

what Mum told me to say.

And then I find out that

not only are you not dead,

but you're Paul bloody Raymond.

It's just...

It's just, I don't know.

Your mother was very young

when she fell pregnant.

Yeah, she was, um, 17.

I, uh... I kept up the

maintenance payments.

Thirty shillings a week

until I was 21.

Yes.

You know, we even share

the same birthday.

15th of November.

Yes, it's quite a coincidence, isn't it?

Mmm.

Yeah, so when I was... blowing

out candles on my birthday cake

at some point during that day,

you'd be doing the same.

Well, I haven't actually had a

birthday cake since 1958, but, uh...

I've got some old photos if you

want to see 'em. I've got, um...

One of you and Mum.

Good Lord.

We both look so young.

Your mother is a

fine-looking woman.

Yeah. Yeah.

I've got some pictures of me

if you want to see them.

Yes, of course. Please do.

Show you these...

There's another one

of you and Mum.

That's Southend.

You can tell by the, er... by the pier.

Did a lot of the seaside resorts,

when we were touring.

- It's so funny.

- Mmm.

Uh... And that's you, is it?

Yeah. That's... that's me

at the seaside.

Yes, you've got a

very characterful face.

- Thanks.

- Yes.

- There she is again.

- Yeah.

- That's you as a baby, is it?

- Yeah.

I think I was about three weeks.

Yes, she looks very happy.

Such a long time ago.

Another life.

Yeah, um, thanks for dinner.

It's really nice to meet you.

Well, absolutely. And thank

you for getting in touch

and I thought it was

very worthwhile.

Well, goodbye, Derry.

Yeah, goodbye, Paul.

Take care.

- Good afternoon, Miss Raymond.

- Hi.

I'm Paul Raymond.

I am Paul Raymond.

I am Paul Raymond.

I'm Geoffrey Quinn.

Aperitif, anyone?

Boss man.

I really want to emphasise

- we only do coke socially.

- Absolutely, yes.

We just happen to be

very sociable people.

I like to do it anti-socially myself.

No, no, no, no. Not for me.

Okay, I'd like to propose a toast

to the one millionth copy of Men Only

sold in the United States of America.

It's called the "'matador look"'.

Oh, my back. I'm joking, I'm joking.

What are you talking about?

This... this is where it all happens.

We need to talk.

That's never a good

start to a conversation.

I'm leaving, Paul.

And I mean it this time.

I'm tired of it.

I just want a normal life.

Normal life is for normal people.

Is there anybody else?

No.

Captain of the cruise

ship in St Tropez?

No.

Cocktail waiter in Jamaica?

No.

Is it me?

Don't answer that.

- Yes.

- Yes.

Is it something I've done?

Something I've, uh, not done?

Something I could do?

You're never gonna change, Paul.

Where will you go?

I'm going to go and live with Debbie.

Debbie knew you were going

to leave me before I did?

You wanted us to be friends.

Well, uh, I own Debbie's flat

and, um, technically

she's not allowed to sublet.

- It's in the lease.

- I'm sorry.

# Anyone who ever loved

# Could look at me

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