The Muppet Movie Page #6

playin' the piano in a-- Oh, never mind.

I missed you.

Don't I get

one kissy-kissy?

I don't think so, Miss Piggy.

just one little hug?

You've been listening

to music to hug frogs by...

and this is Doc Hopper sayin'

that if Kermit the Frog...

don't stop right now and call me...

and agree to be my national spokesman,

he will soon be a frogburger.

- We'll be okay.

- Oh, mon capitaine.

Oh, boy. Yeah.

What? No problem!

It's okay, it's okay.

No problem. Hey, all right!

We're in trouble.

I wish I still had

my Studebaker.

There's probably somethin'

broken about the engine.

Hey, don't worry.

Someone's bound to come along.

Yeah?

Well, I guess we blew it,

huh, Gonzo?

Yeah.

But the sky sure is

beautiful out here.

Look at that.

We're gonna miss

the auditions tomorrow, right?

Boy, you could get lost

in a sky like that.

I wish I had

those balloons again.

So much for Hollywood.

Listen, gang.

I never promised we'd make it.

I never promised anything.

This looks familiar

Vaguely familiar

Almost unreal,yet

It's too soon to feel yet

Close to my soul

And yet so far away

I'm going to go

back there someday

Sun rises, night falls

Sometimes the sky calls

Is that a song there

And do I belong there

I've never been there

But I know the way

I'm going to go back there

Someday

Come and go with me

It's more fun to share

We'll both be completely

At home in midair

We're flyin', not walking

On featherless wings

We can hold on to young

Like invisible string

There's not a word yet

For old friends who've just met

Part heaven, part space

Or have I found my place

You can just visit

But I plan to stay

I'm going to go back there

Someday

I'm going to go back there

Someday

I didn't promise anybody anything.

What do I know

about Hollywood anyway?

just the dreams I got from sitting

through too many double features.

So why did you leave the swamp

in the first place?

'Cause some agent fella

said I had talent.

He probably says that

to everybody.

On the other hand,

if you hadn't left the swamp...

you'd be feeling

pretty miserable anyhow.

Yeah, but then it would

just be me feelin' miserable.

Now I got a lady pig

and a bear and a chicken...

a dog, a thing--

whatever Gonzo is.

- He's a little like a turkey.

- Yeah, A little like a turkey.

- But not much.

- No, I guess not.

Anyhow, I brought 'em all out here

into the middle of nowhere.

It's all my fault.

Still...

whether you promised them

something or not...

you gotta remember

they wanted to come.

But that's because

they believed in me.

No, they believed

in the dream.

- Well, so do I, but--

- You do?

- Yeah. Of course I do.

- Well, then?

Well, then...

I guess I was wrong

when I said I never promised anyone.

I promised me.

Hey, now, wait a minute.

Hey, what's happening?

At the moment,

we're what's happening.

Oh, great!

Wonderful! Yeah!

Zoot! Hey, Zoot!

Hold it, hold it.

Animal, cool it back there.

Yeah.

All right, yeah.

Hey, it's wonderful to see you,

but how did you ever find us?

Oh, easy. We just read

the screenplay you left us.

'' Exterior desert, night.''

We knew right where you were.

Like, can you get behind it?

Hey, when you dudes

have to be at that audition?

- 2:
00 tomorrow afternoon.

- Well, climb aboard the bus.

We'll have breakfast

at Hollywood and Vine.

Movin'right along

Oh,yeah

Here we go.

Movin'right along

Kermie, whisper sweet nothings

into my ear.

Motorcycle cop.

'' Motorcycle cop''

is a sweet nothing?

A motorcycle cop is chasing us.

Hey, Dr. Teeth,

you better pull over.

Hey, easier done than said.

- Drag city.

- What do we do now?

Oh, dear.

Hey, hey. The man with the badge.

The police.

The cops, the fuzz, the P-I--

- Don't you dare.

- I wouldn't think of it.

Did we do something

wrong, Officer?

- Kermie, it's him!

- Okay, gang. Let him explain.

This whole disguise is

only so I could warn you.

Yeah. Sure, sure.

I never thought Doc would hurt Kermit.

I thought he was gonna lean on him.

But now he's got this

frog killer in from the coast...

and the man is deadly!

Oh, no. Kermit,

what are we gonna do?

It's time to beat feet,

green stuff.

I love it. Chase music is

one of our best riffs.

Hold it, Dr. Teeth.

What's up ahead?

- Only an old ghost town.

- Fine.

Listen, you go tell Doc Hopper

I'll be waiting for him there.

- What?

- Kermit, you'll get killed!

Listen, guys. Listen.

I can't spend my whole life

running away from a bully.

It's time for a showdown.

Chugga, chugga.

Hey, listen.

I'm gonna check things out.

Everybody stay

on the bus, okay?

- Hey, Kermit?

- Yeah?

Can I take Animal for a walk?

He needs some exercise.

Yeah, sure.

What is that?

That's one of my latest inventions--

a musical rotating rain barrel.

- Oh, yeah.

- You see...

I'm Dr. Bunsen Honeydew,

and this is my assistant, Beaker.

We live here,

perfecting useful inventions.

Come in, come in.

Welcome to our laboratory.

Please don't touch anything.

Is this the only street into town?

Yes, yes.

Hey, what are you dudes

doin' in here?

I'm so glad you asked!

We're perfecting

our latest invention...

insta-grow pills.

Well, what in the name

of Fats Waller is that?

A four-foot prune!

A four-foot prune.

Yeah, man. Well, what else

do these pills make big?

They work on anything.

But the effect is,

sadly, temporary.

Sadly temporary.

Hey, Kermit!

Here comes Doc Hopper!

I know.

I'll be ready for him.

Okay, frog. Where are ya?

I'm here. I'll meet you

in the middle of the street.

- Oh, yeah?

- Man to frog.

- All right, Hopper.

- All right, frog.

One last chance.

You can do my TV commercials

live or stuffed.

What's the matter with you?

You gotta be crazy chasin' me

halfway across the country.

Why are you doin' this to me?

'Cause all my life I wanted to own

a thousand frog-leg restaurants...

and you're the key, greenie.

Yeah, well,

I've got a dream too.

But it's about singing and

dancing and making people happy.

The kind of dream that gets better

the more people you share it with.

And, well, I've found a whole bunch

of friends who have the same dream.

And it kind of

makes us like a family.

You have anybody

like that, Hopper?

Once you get all those restaurants,

who're you gonna share it with?

Who are your friends, Doc?

Those guys?

I got lots of friends.

Max, for instance.

- Max.

- I don't think you're a bad man, Doc.

I think if you look

in your heart...

you'll find you really want

to let me and my friends go...

to follow our dream.

But if that's not

the kind of man you are...

and if what I'm saying

doesn't make any sense to you...

well, then,

go ahead and kill me.

All right, boys.

Kill him.

No, wait, please!

- Everybody goin' to Hollywood?

- Yeah!

Next stop is

Hollywood and Vine.

Look at the ocean!

The ocean!

Yes, Mr. Lord. I'll have those

deal memos for you in a jiffy.

I'm sorry.

Mr. Lord can't be disturbed by anyone.

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