The Name of the Rose Page #3

WILLIAM:
Monkeys do not laugh.

Laughter is particular to man.

JORGE:
As is sin. Christ never laughed.

WILLIAM:
Can we be so sure?

JORGE:
There is nothing in the scriptures to say

that He did.

WILLIAM:
And there's nothing in the scriptures to

say that He did not. Even the saints have

been known to employ comedy to ridicule

the enemies of the faith.

For example, when the pagans plunged St.

Maurus into the boiling water, he complained

that his bath was too cold. The Sultan put

his hand in, scalded it.

JORGE:
A saint immersed in boiling water does not

play childish tricks. He restrains his cries

and suffers for the truth.

WILLIAM:
And yet, Aristotle devoted his second book

of Poetics to comedy as an instrument of

truth.

JORGE:
You have read this work?

WILLIAM:
No, of course not. It's been lost for

many centuries.

JORGE:
No, it has not! It was never written!

Because Providence doesn't want futile

things glorified.

WILLIAM:
Oh, that I must contest...

JORGE:
Enough! This abbey is overshadowed by

grief. Yet you would intrude on our

sorrow with idle banter!

WILLIAM:
Forgive me, Venerable Jorge.

My remarks were truly out of place.

WILLIAM:
(to a monk)

Which was the Greek translator's desk?

MONK:
This one.

WILLIAM:
Come, Adso.

EXT.

WILLIAM:
Well, Adso, what did you deduce from

that visit?

ADSO:
That we are not meant to laugh in there.

WILLIAM:
But did you notice how few books there

were on the scryptorium shelves? All

those scriveners, copyists, translators,

researchers, thinkers... But where are

the multitude of books that they need for

their work? And for which this abbey is

famed. Where are the books?

ADSO:
Are you testing me, master?

WILLIAM:
What do you mean?

ADSO:
Well, with all due respect... it seems

that whenever you ask me a question, you

already have the answer. Do you know

where the books are?

WILLIAM:
No.

But I'll wager my faith that that tower

contains something other than air.

ADSO:
Did you notice that little door the librarian

closed as we came in?

WILLIAM:
Yes.

ADSO:
Would that lead to the library?

(something falls onto them)

WILLIAM:
(crys)

ADSO:
(follows)

Master! Master, quick! I have him!

WILLIAM:
Stop! Enough!

ADSO:
Master, he tried to kill us!

REMIGIO:
Salvatore! (slaps his face)

(to William) Please, don't talk to the

abbot about his past. He's innocent of

the deaths in this abbey. I swear it.

WILLIAM:
Brother Remigio, we need you. My price

is some information.

ADSO (V.O.):
I could not comprehend why my master so

quickly dismissed my suspicions of the

heretical hunchback... and why it was so

urgent that we visit the tower. I assumed

he could not resist the temptation to

penetrate the library and look at the

books.

INT. LIBRARY - NIGHT

(The assistant librarian, who is reading

a book all alone, puts out a candle)

WILLIAM:
No lock. Just as I thought, it must be

bolted from the inside.

ADSO:
How do we get in?

WILLIAM:
Well, obviously, there must be another

entrance.

Let's see what the moon-faced assistant

librarian was trying to conceal from us

this morning, shall we?

(finds a note)

Tiny Greek letters, perhaps written by

an ant with inky feet.

"Use vulgar people take pleasure from

their defects... "

(brings the note to a candle)

Ah, yes. Written with lemon juice.

"Sagittarius... Sun... Mercury...

Scorpion." It's some zodiacal code

giving directions, but to where?

(clanks)

Who's there?

Hey! Who's there?

Who's there?

(somwone taking the book, flees)

WILLIAM:
My magnifying glasses!

They were on that book.

EXT. NIGHT

WILLIAM:
(to Adso) You go that way.

(to light his lantern, Adso enters the kitchen)

REMIGIO:
Come on out, you little b*tch!

I know you are here. I can smell you.

What's the matter with you, huh?

Are you afraid of me?

(a girl is hiding)

I'll find you.

(the girl seduces Adso)

ADSO (V.O.):
Who was she?

Who was this creature that rose like the

dawn... was bewitching as the moon, radiant

as the sun... terrible as an army poised

for battle?

WILLIAM:
Good evening, Salvatore.

This is where you catch them?

SALVATORE:
You see, they are "piu grasso."

Bigger, eh?

WILLIAM:
You... You eat them?

SALVATORE:
You like?

WILLIAM:
Thank you, no. No.

SALVATORE:
"Ich bin" good catholic.

WILLIAM:
As you're a good Christian, you must

tell me this.

So Adelmo gave the parchment to Berengar?

SALVATORE:
No, no.

To the translo... the transla...

WILLIAM:
Translator! Venantius, the black monk.

SALVATORE:
Yes, yes.

WILLIAM:
And what happened then?

SALVATORE:
Then...

INT. KITCHEN

ADSO:
(finds a lump of flesh)

Master! In here, quick!

I found another one.

WILLIAM:
Where are your wits, boy?

Have you ever met anyone with a rib cage

large enough to accommodate a heart of

those dimensions?

ADSO:
No. No.

WILLIAM:
It is the heart of an ox.

One of the monks probably gave it to that

peasant girl in exchange for her favors.

ADSO:
Girl? Well, what...?

WILLIAM:
The one I saw scuttling out of here.

He must have been a very ugly monk.

ADSO. Why ugly?

WILLIAM:
If he'd been young and beautiful, she

would no doubt have blessed him with her

carnal favors for nothing.

In any event, whatever happened in this

dreadful kitchen has no bearing on our

investigations.

The hunchback convinced me that Brother

Berengar, the assistant librarian, is the

key to the whole enigma.

What did you say?

ADSO:
Nothing, master.

WILLIAM:
Good.

INT. NIGHT

ADSO:
Master?

There's something I must tell you.

WILLIAM:
I know.

ADSO:
Then, will you hear my confession?

WILLIAM:
Well, I'd rather you told me first as

a friend.

ADSO:
Master. Have you ever been... in love?

WILLIAM:
In love? Yeah. Many times.

ADSO:
You were?

WILLIAM:
Of course. Aristotle, Ovid, Virgil...

ADSO:
No, no, no. I meant with a...

WILLIAM:
Oh. Ah.

Are you not confusing love with lust?

ADSO:
Am I? I don't know.

WILLIAM:
I want only her own good.

ADSO:
I want her to be happy. I want to save

her from her poverty.

WILLIAM:
Oh, dear.

ADSO:
Why "oh, dear"?

WILLIAM:
You are in love.

ADSO:
Is that bad?

WILLIAM:
For a monk, it does present certain

problems.

ADSO:
But doesn't St. Thomas Aquinas praise

love above all other virtues?

WILLIAM:
Yes. The love of God, Adso. The love

of God!

ADSO:
And the love of... woman?

WILLIAM:
Of woman, Thomas Aquinas knew precious

little. But the scriptures are very clear.

Proverbs warns us, "Woman takes possession

of a man's precious soul."

While Ecclesiastics tells us, "More bitter

than death is woman."

ADSO:
Yes, but what do you think, master?

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