The New Twenty Page #4

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No?

You love them.

It's been my pleasure listening

to you unburdening yourself.

You're a good listener.

How would you like

a blowj*b from an old cowboy?

Here?

This is Andrew.

What's that?

I'm sorry. It's noisy here.

Nobody use it.

Louie?

Guess what.

Call the investors.

Tell them we're in business.

Yeah.

I got our first client.

I'll tell you all about it.

Give me two minutes.

I've got to call Julie.

F***, yeah!

Yes!

Can you f***in' believe it?

Are you serious?

I know it's just one sale, babe,

but it's the first.

So we're gonna celebrate.

I want you to get

everyone together.

Everyone?

Why the hell not?

Okay.

Look, hon.

I got to run.

Go, go.

Hey, did you get my message?

Yeah.

You'll come, won't you?

I'm not the one who made

a big deal out of it.

Andrew is.

Well, he's over it.

Well, fantastic.

So you'll be there?

Yes, I will be there.

Good. Thank you.

Wait.

Louie's not gonna

be there, is he?

No.

God, no.

Okay.

I'll see you later.

All right. Later.

A toast, a toast!

Listen!

To our man, Andrew.

Hear, hear.

Now we all know it is

easy to make fun of Andrew.

I mean, let's face it.

Enthusiasm is so not cool...

...and Andrew is nothing

if not enthusiastic.

Hoo, hoo, hoo!

But let us also not forget

that enthusiasm takes courage.

The kind of courage

that us lesser -

...albeit much cooler men -

...can only mock.

So, all mocking aside...

Andrew, my friend...

You did good.

And we're proud of you.

Thanks.

Cheers.

Bottoms up.

Let's go to a titty bar.

You know, I miss

kickin' your ass...

...all over that court.

Yeah, you got lucky

once or twice.

Oh, I got lucky!

I told you I'd get you

back on that court -

...did I not?

- Yes...

- Did I not?

Yes! You did!

What else are you

gonna do for me?

Get out of here.

You work for the city!

Come on, man! What?

What?

Um...

What?

I love you.

Yo, Louie!

It's Ben.

Remember me?

Of course I do, man.

What's up?

Well, as you may

or may not know...

I am Andrew's best man.

And as such,

I have certain duties.

Oh, yeah?

In a word - Yes.

For example, bachelor party.

Yeah, well, I know

a thing or two about that.

Can you make that happen?

Yeah, man.

I'd be happy to help.

That's fantastic.

Jesus f***ing Christ.

Piece of sh*t!

Hey, sexy.

Hey, beautiful.

Did you order food?

No.

All right, bro.

Come on!

There's no escape.

What's going on?

Is Tony here?

No.

It's your boy's

big night, that's all.

Okay, buddy!

Shoes on.

Now!

Resistance is futile.

You will be assimilated!

Felix, what is this?

No, man.

You better just

do as he says.

Get the loafers!

No time for laces!

I have no idea, babe.

Don't worry.

We'll take good care of him.

Maybe we'll get out early.

Anyone else coming?

No, buddy.

More to go around.

Do it up!

Because I'm smooth!

I'm f***ing SMOOTH!

Yeah, baby!

Who's the lucky one?

F***ing genius...

I know.

That's the best thing about

the fall of the Iron Curtain.

Take that sh*t off!

Felix, where are you going?

He doesn't know, man.

Yeah!

Yeah, baby!

Nice.

Felix, What are you doin'?

It's my party.

Wuff, wuff, wuff!

Ben is a dog.

Wuff, wuff, wuff!

Let him get a blowj*b

from some hooker.

Really?

Did you believe that?

- No.

- Neither did I.

Can we change

the f***ing subject?

All right.

Let's talk about your

addict friend then.

He's not an addict.

You could've fooled me.

He's not an addict.

- He is, dude.

- B*tch, he's not.

Why that?

Did you see that?

No more wine for you.

Okay.

Where we goin'?

This way.

Don't worry.

They don't bite.

I don't know, man...

Compliments of the house.

This is your

big night, bubba.

Right?

This is your

get-out-of-jail-free card.

This is what it's all about.

That's what you came here for.

Hey... Felix.

You know what

would be totally cool?

If you joined

Andrew's company with me.

And then we'd all be like...

What?

Don't you get it, man?

Andrew's not gonna hire you.

Of course he is.

No, man.

He hired a headhunter...

...for marketing and sales.

Seriously?

He's a dick.

Hey, wake me up

when the chicks come back.

Hey.

I am not slurring.

You are!

No, no, no.

It's bullshit!

That's what it is.

What is?

What I said.

Now that we're all

on the same page.

What are you talking about?

Oh! The stripper I ordered!

It's Felix.

What's up?

What is it? What?

What is it?

I think he said he's stuck.

He is such a freak.

Are you at Louie's?

Where is everybody?

Hey, Felix, are you there?

Can you hear me?

Hello?

Felix?

Sh*t.

What is going on?

- What did he say?

- Hold on.

Sh*t.

- Why is he alone?

- I don't know.

I thought you said he

doesn't do...

He doesn't!

- I'm going with you.

- Is that a good idea?

Oh, my God.

Hey.

What are you guys

doing here?

Where's Felix?

I don't know.

Is he like, passed out

somewhere in this apartment...

...and you don't even know it?

If I don't even know it,

how could I answer that?

Where's Andrew?

Felix?

Hey, Felix.

Are you in there?

Sh*t.

Who the hell is that?

Julie?

I need some help here!

Oh, God.

Is he breathing okay?

I think so.

Maybe we should lift him out.

Is that a good idea?

- What do you suggest?

- I don't know!

Felix!

Can you hear me?

Hey. Can you hear me?

Why did you let him?

Let him what?

Shut up and help us!

- Holy sh*t!

- Watch his head!

On his side,

not his back!

- Why?

- Jimi Hendrix!

He's looking blue.

I'm calling an ambulance.

Wait!

Why?

Don't call 911!

He's worried about the police.

Call the fire department.

Felix! Come on!

Help me!

Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha!

Hey, man.

- Can you hear me, dude?

- Felix, wake up.

Heroin.

No.

I'm not sure how much.

Yes.

I think so, yes.

Felix, can you hear me?

Can you hear me?

Bunch of f***ing teenagers!

Felix, it's me.

I'm here, okay?

Stay with me, okay?

Get a towel!

I slept with Louie.

Hey, Felix.

We'll see you

at the hospital, all right?

Lie down.

You comin'?

Andrew?

Ben?

I'll see you there.

You forgot your shoes...

A**hole.

Have a seat, man.

So...

I've thought about this.

Well, I'm sure you have.

I'm here to do

business with you.

Okay.

I hear Matt and Samantha quit.

I'm better off without them.

You know, you can't

manage for sh*t.

Excuse me?

I'm cutting my losses.

Cappuccino?

No, thanks.

Hey!

Call me when you get there.

I will.

So...

Yeah.

All this f***ing emotion.

Numbness was better.

I like you like this.

Yeah.

Hey.

Who are these guys?

Old friends. College.

Would you like an espresso?

Sure.

So would I.

Piece of sh*t.

Tony's room is open

if you want it.

You're not serious.

Why not?

I could think

of a few reasons.

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