The Olivia Experiment

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MAN:
Women don't understand,

you know?

I mean,

I don't know what they expect.

Er, well, I guess I do know

what they expect.

WOMAN:
So last night,

we were trying

and I just felt so ill,

I... I threw up.

WOMAN 2:

I gave masturbation another go.

WOMAN 3:

How'd it go?

No orgasm,

not even arousal, darn it.

Can you tell me

how you first find out

that you might be asexual?

Oh.

I never,

I never felt the attraction.

It was about fifth grade, so.

I've...

I will say I feel much better

not studying the porn

all the time.

Um, that was a great suggestion

from you guys.

WOMAN 3:
Well that's great!

Congratulations.

MAN:
Thank you.

So we have a new face.

Welcome.

It's your first time?

Yes. Hi, I'm Olivia.

Hi, Olivia.

Hey.

WOMAN 3:
Hi, Olivia.

And I'm here because

I think I might be...

Um, I'm 27.

And I don't have any clue

as to what my orientation is.

Well many of us tried on

different orientations

Gay.

Bi.

Straight.

MAN:

Cross dresser.

But it wasn't until

we found other Aces

that we could really find

a label that fit.

But I haven't tried

anything, though.

Olivia, Asexual Support

welcomes you.

Thank you.

Um, hi.

Wow!

This is so awkward, um...

I guess I'm...

searching?

I think I have a...

an issue with intimacy.

So I don't really know

what it's like to...

to have a relationship.

You know we are in a society

where people are, like,

force-fed sex constantly.

Why do we need that much...

sex?

And I just, it, I...

Heh. I can't function.

I can't function normally

in society, and it...

I need...

I need to work on that.

Thanks.

Olivia.

I think you might

wanna try out

some different

support groups.

What do you mean?

Sometimes people use

asexuality to hide.

There's no right

or wrong, but...

it's just all about finding

the right fit for you.

Ok.

Ok?

Uh-huh.

[POP MUSIC PLAYS]

[INHALES]

For the record, I don't

think you're an asexual.

Who told you?

In the bathroom.

Ok, so it's something that I've

been looking into as an option.

One that fits quite well,

actually.

You might also wanna

try sex as an option too.

Ah, ok.

Too much pressure.

OLIVIA:
So in reality it wasn't

the Simone de Beauvoirs

but the Shulamith Firestones

that paved the way

for the Riot Grrrls...

Olivia! Congratulations

on the Provosts' grant.

I'm very happy

for you.

Thank you. Bye.

OLIVIA:
"Once conform,

"once do what other people

do because they do it,

"and a lethargy steals

over all the finer nerves

and faculties of the soul."

"She becomes all outer show

and inward emptiness;

"dull, callous,

and indifferent."

Excuse me.

Excuse me. Karl is it?

Uh, please tell me,

why are you here?

You have no concept of a

brilliant mind's deepest thoughts.

This is an upper level course,

and you guys are sitting here

pretending like

you're fulfilling

some breadth requirement

with no care in the world

except your next date or screw!

Well you know what,

I've had it

with you cocksuckers!

[GASPS]

Class is dismissed!

[MURMURING]

Olivia.

Olivia, are you ok?

I'm a horrible person!

You're just stressed.

It happens.

[CRYING]

I just blew up at them.

Olivia, do you think

this has anything to do

with that asexuality group?

Does everybody

know about that?!

Your friends have just been

a little concerned,

I mean you've been

a little freaked out lately...

Yeah. Well, I'm frustrated

by the porn-centric culture!

I think maybe you should just

get it over with, you know.

I mean,

just go to a bar...

I'm not gonna take my life in

my hands with some stranger.

I think you're putting a lot

of importance on this act.

That's easy enough

for you to say.

You've been doing it

for years

with a variety of partners.

I have been lucky.

Sorry.

Well, I haven't.

So for me,

there's asexual support.

Asexual Support System.

ASS. Heh-heh.

MAN:
That performance can't

be repeated

if you're to continue teaching

your own seminars, Olivia.

I know. It won't.

You see, aside from

your free-floating rage,

there is a concern

in this department

that you lack

the life experience

to take on Modernism and Realism

as you've chosen to do.

But all I've ever wanted

to do is be a professor,

and all I've ever loved

my entire life is language.

And yet you seem unconcerned

with the very stuff

language expresses...

our shared struggles,

our deepest humanity.

You seem averse

to self-exploration.

Nothing personal has emerged

in your work.

Well...

what do you suggest

that I do then?

Live a little.

So he just told you

that you need to live more?

Yes! I don't even know

what that means.

Hey, stranger.

Hey!

Hi.

Sorry,

I know that's annoying.

Sorry.

No, it's ok.

No, um... I respect both

of you a lot. So it's ok.

Doesn't she look

terrific today?

Yeah.

Yeah, you look good.

Yeah, thanks.

A skirt can help

with the transition

into the superficial object

of male desire,

but my entire being

is basically untouchable.

I am aware of that.

Ok, I'm just

going to go back to work.

No, no wait!

What if you had sex

with Julian?

I mean,

you guys get along.

I... I...

Yeah.

Yeah.

Why not?

Um...

Look, I mean it's...

it's not a big deal,

you know.

I mean,

just try him out.

Um, because intercourse

right now

would completely derail

my emerging asexuality.

Heh. I kinda think

maybe it would help

clear some of that stuff up

for you, actually.

Yeah.

It's fun.

No, I...

you guys are in love.

I couldn't possibly get

in the way of that.

You wouldn't.

We have a huge amount

of trust in our relationship.

Well... I, um...

Look, Olivia, it's like,

if I didn't know about it

then it would definitely

be wrong.

But I know about it,

so it's fine.

JULIAN:
Yeah.

It makes sense to me.

Mm-hmm.

He's really great too.

Uh, great.

I'm sure, um...

I mean it would be cheaper

than psychotherapy. Heh.

Maybe this weekend?

I'll go

to my parents...

I, uh...

you go over there

and shabam!

Uh...

Do it!

Yeah, ok.

Ok. Ok!

Um, right.

Uh, just text me about it, ok?

I will sext you

about it.

Yeah. Um...

All right, well,

wanna go with me?

Guess I'm having sex.

[CHUCKLING]

MAN:
Sleep with Julian?

Felisha's Julian?

That's great!

Why did I ever agree

to this?

It's perfectly logical.

Julian's hot.

I just don't think

I can go through with it.

That's ok, too.

My advisor did encourage

some self-exploration

on behalf of my work.

Your work?

Asexuality is not generally

considered in the discourse.

I... I could be a pioneer...

Whoa. Do it, but don't

pawn it off as work.

An exploration,

an experiment!

[GASPS]

I'll film it!

What, like a porno?

No... a legitimate look

into my own sexuality

and gendering.

Sounds... wrong...

in so many ways.

Are we rolling?

We good?

Ok. [EXHALES]

[CLEARS THROAT]

Hmm.

The subject of the experiment

is me, Olivia Howell.

I'm 27.

Not only am I a virgin,

I have never even made out

with anyone...

other than on stage

in an all-women's production

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