The One I Love Page #6

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your shoes.

And you can keep pretending

that you like the way

I pin my hair back,

and we'll just have a good time

and see what happens.

On second thought, do you mind

taking care of those dishes?

You still haven't told me

where you're from.

Are we still doing this?

Are we going to compare

lists of women, too?

You know, I'm starting to

piece this all together

and see it for what it is.

You're trying to

sabotage my relationship.

Ethan, from what I understand

about your relationships,

you should be well versed

in the art of self-sabotage.

The purpose of tonight

is not to engage

in some warped competition

between us,

at least not on my end.

It wouldn't really be fair.

Yeah? Why is that?

Haven't you

figured it out yet?

It's kings.

It's kings or it's aces

is what's going on.

There's something going on.

Why don't you worry

about your own cards.

I don't even know why

we're continuing right now.

I basically know

every card you're holding.

Are you saying

that I have a tell?

You have big tells.

You want to know

what your tell is?

I want to know

what you think it is.

You have a very consistent

albeit very cute

Sophie shoulder shrug

that looks

a little bit like this.

Oh! Do you do the shrug?

Uh, excuse me.

Don't talk to her.

She's dead.

She folded.

It's just you and me now.

You did the shoulder shrug.

You obviously

have a good hand.

It's like a high pair

or maybe even three of a kind.

F***ing raise this sh*t, man.

You only live once.

Okay. I'll raise.

Now I know

you have the confidence.

I have a sh*t hand.

I'm folding.

Look at that.

Jesus, are you kidding me?

- What?

- You're right.

- Pair of aces.

- Ooh!

Nailed it, nailed it.

I knew you had the aces.

Dude, by the way, you're getting

very good at this game...

Almost too good.

I'm beginning to think this is

like one long Sophie con.

He clearly just let you win.

Yes, Ethan.

Obviously he let me win.

Come on, guys.

This is supposed to just

be a friendly game.

You're not being very fun

to play with.

The reason he's not being fun

is because he's not even playing.

Ethan, if you want to

win the game,

you've got to play

some hands, okay?

That's just how it works.

All right.

Fine. I'll play.

Deal me in.

You and me.

Come on.

You want to play one on...

Okay. All right.

That's the spirit.

Come on, buddy.

Let's get in the game.

Let's go.

Mmm-hmm.

All right.

How many cards do you want?

I'm fine with what I have.

Thank you very much.

Sticking with what you have.

All right. I'll stick

with what I have, too.

What's your move'?

I'm all in.

Oh!

All in, bold move!

But you've got to be impulsive

sometimes. I really like it'

All right, so you're all in,

and now I've got to figure out

what is your tell.

You've got that restless

leg thing going on

but I think it's just nerves.

You've been chewing

on the lower lip a little bit,

but I get ulcers in there, too,

so maybe that's just

what that is.

So weird lip...

Oh!

Oh, sh*t!

Of course. There it is.

The guy who has nothing

and he knows it.

Sorry, buddy, but I've got to

call you on this one.

What you got?

Whatever.

You have nothing

and I win with an ace high.

Sorry about that, man.

It's fun playing with you, but you've

got to work on your bluffing skills.

You win.

You're an amazing liar.

Congratulations on being a shithead.

- Whoa!

- Ethan, Jesus. Calm down.

Hey, wait a minute,

wait a minute.

I don't want to take

all the credit here.

You're a pretty decent liar

yourself, right?

What are you talking about?

Do you want to tell her

or should I?

Is this necessary?

I think it's important that

Sophie knows what's going on.

We're all friends here, right?

Uh, would everybody just tell me

what we're talking about?

What happened?

It's nothing.

All right, look,

Ethan was a little suspicious that

something was going on between us,

so he decided to try

and figure it out for himself.

It was actually kind of

a brilliant move.

He didn't go

to the grocery store.

He ended up sneaking

into the guest house,

and in a strange

twist of events,

he pretended to be me,

so you actually slept with Ethan

instead of me.

I can't f***ing pretend

to be you... I am me.

You... What the f***

are you talking about?

Just shut up!

Sophie, please.

That was you yesterday?

Sweetheart.

Basically,

first he betrayed

you by sleeping with someone else

and then he kind of betrayed you

by sleeping with you.

Sorry, guys. I didn't want to make

like a thing here.

If you guys need

some space or something.

If you want to like

take the guest house,

you'd be welcome.

I'm not going anywhere.

No, I want you to leave.

If not,

leave a detailed message

and I will return your call.

Hey. It's Ethan.

Um, I'm really just calling

to thank you

for your wonderful

recommendation this weekend.

Maybe next session you can send us

to a f***ing holocaust museum.

Thank you very much.

All right, so we have to hit

the keys at the exact same time.

This is a strange exercise.

On three, okay?

One...

- All right.

- Two.

Three.

You met in

Scottsdale, Arizona.

We met in

Scottsdale, Arizona.

Madison, you have

two sisters, right?

Yes, two sisters.

Fm the middle child,

and my dad wasn't present.

Why are you here?

You were raised in

a predominantly female household

and you had serious...

Ethan and Sophie.

Holy sh*t!

All right.

Try it again.

I am Ethan.

I am Sophie.

I am Ethan.

I am Sophie.

I am Ethan.

I am Sophie.

I am Ethan.

I am Sophie.

I am Ethan.

I am Sophie.

I am Ethan.

I am Sophie.

I am Ethan.

What the hell is this'?

I am Sophie.

That's getting good.

You're almost ready.

I never took that picture.

No, no, no, no.

No!

What the...

Sh*t!

Somebody help!

Help!

Help! Sophie!

Sophie, can you hear me?

Sophie, I'm stuck.

Hey.

Sophie? Sophie, I'm in here.

Sophie, I'm in here.

Sophie! I'm stuck.

- What the...

- We don't have much time.

They think I'm out

picking fruit for breakfast.

What?

Okay. A lot happened

last night after you left.

Do you know

that you're Sophie?

Are you pretending?

I don't know,

what's happening?

I'm not your wife.

Okay. What the f***'s going on,

and who are you?

He fell in love with her.

He's not supposed to

fall in love with her.

She's supposed to fall

out of love with you.

That's how this works.

That's how we get out.

What the hell are you

talking about? I don't...

- That's how we become you.

- You become us?

Pitting you against each other

is the best way to break you down,

and then

ifs your turn to stay.

What the fu...

What the f***?

Oh, my God.

Did you try to

get out last night?

- Yes.

- You couldn't.

No.

That's because the closer

we get to moving on,

the closer you get

to not being able to.

Do you remember

when you first got here?

I was stuck here.

You had to come see me.

Now look.

Ethan.

Ethan, it's not going to work.

I have to be the one

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