The Other Woman Page #7

you're a little bloated.

I have b*obs!

These nipples look

like they've done

hard time in Africa

feeding a village.

You're overreacting.

They're straight

out of the Congo!

Just tape them up.

No! I can't go to

work with my tits taped!

Where are you going?

To do push-ups.

Did you want this smoothie?

He's back to

sexting like a freak.

And the pictures!

Picking up my phone is like

being flashed on the subway.

Try living in the same house

with him. All I get is surprise penis.

It's like his sex

drive is tripled.

Non-stop.

I thought you were

giving him hormones.

I am!

Enough for

a pre-Op transsexual.

He must be taking Viagra.

Well, now that sex

is off the table...

...we have to

speak to one another,

and I think he's

getting suspicious.

Really?

Yeah.

Maybe one of us

should sleep with him.

Are you crazy?

Just to let some

steam out of the pot.

No. Please keep

the lid on the pot.

You don't think I can handle it?

You know what?

I'll do it.

I'll take one for the team.

No. You think he's

an evil sociopath.

He is!

But better me than you.

I can weather a little hate sex.

I'll do it. I don't

have a lot of feelings.

Come on.

You guys have no faith in me.

I have a friend who could do it.

No, no, no. We are not hiring a

hooker to sleep with my husband.

She's not a hooker.

She's just a slut.

Okay, we're done here.

I'm going to do it.

I'll do it. If you

do it, I do it.

Me, too.

Fine. Rock, paper, scissors.

Winner has sex with my husband.

Really?

It's the only way.

One time, or two out of three?

One time.

Well, Amber wins.

You okay with that?

Yeah. I couldn't

be more okay. What?

You're so full of sh*t.

Kate!

Pst!

Hey!

Where have you been?

Are you okay?

I've been trying you all day!

Can you open the door for me?

Wow.

What is going on?

Wow.

This is what it's come to, huh?

I think I'm having

a nervous breakdown.

Is it ever going

to get any easier?

Yeah. It Will.

When?

Well, it's going to

suck for a little while.

Then it's going to

suck a little less.

And then one day that

ring will just be a ring.

You'll take it off and it'll just

be something you used to wear.

I hope so.

Katie?

He's supposed to be with Amber!

Sh*t!

I'm home!

No, there's no

room under the bed.

No, I can see you.

Go out the window.

Go out the window.

Honey?

I'm not going out the window!

No! You can't get in there.

I'm ticklish.

Hi, sweetie!

You're home early!

I canceled.

What's all this?

Oh, you know, sometimes

I like to put on my dress.

It's pretty.

You do?

You know when you just feel like,

"Normal clothes are blah"...

...and you're just like,

"I wish I had a costume!"

You know when you get like that?

No. Not really.

Why don't you come to my

investor dinner this weekend?

We'll get dressed

up and you can see...

...what I'm doing with

all your great ideas.

Okay!

I'll get us some drinks.

Scotch okay?

That'd be perfect, thank you.

Get out!

Be careful.

Hold on! Wait, wait!

Ah!

Sorry!

Ow!

Big year.

Great job.

Kate, you remember

my partner, Nick.

Yes! Hi.

It's been ages.

Good to see you again.

This is Cece.

Kate's the one who

had the idea for

SwipeSwitch.Com.

Oh, my God! I am

obsessed with that idea.

I can't wait for

the site to go up.

Wow! Thank you.

That really means a lot.

She's my little idea factory.

Maybe you should ask her

about ServiceCircuit.

Is that still

circling the drain?

More like the toilet. But the potential's

there... we could make it work.

How much?

Two million.

We'll talk about it.

But if two million doesn't

work, we shut it down.

Thanks. I appreciate it.

You made us a ton of money this year.

Nobody bats a thousand.

True.

On that happy note,

who needs a drink?

I do.

You want another?

Sure.

See you in a bit.

She's lovely.

She is.

Is it serious?

Uh, no.

Well, I was sorry to hear

about you and Julie.

Me, too.

But the lawyers say

it's all very amicable.

So fake it until you make it.

Something like that.

Katie!

Come on.

Oh, this is beautiful!

Wow.

Mmm.

Whoa!

Nice.

This is pretty.

Hmm.

Hmm.

Did you ever think

when we had that shitty

little apartment

on Charles Street...

...we'd end up here?

That wasn't a shitty apartment.

That was a great apartment.

Remember how tiny it was?

And we had the bathroom

in the kitchen?

And every time I flushed the

toilet, the shower got cold?

I hated it.

I loved that apartment.

It just seems like everything

was so simple then. You know?

Mmm-hmm.

I was happy.

And I just wanted

you to be happy.

I am.

Are you?

You can tell me.

I won't be mad.

I wouldn't even

be me without you.

I might not always

get it right, but...

...I'm exactly

where I want to be.

Do you promise?

I'm so glad you're here.

We have so much to tell you!

Major breakthroughs.

What is all this?

Amber got Mark's password

off the nanny cam.

Hacked into his

computer the night

she was supposed to

have sex with him.

You saw him?

He came over after work.

Did you have sex?

No!

I know I said I would, but you looked

so sad when I won, I couldn't.

I chickened out and

said I had Chlamydia!

That's right, b*tch!

Chlamydia!

He can't have sex till

he finishes his Z-Pak!

Mark's not just a cheating scumbag.

He's a thief.

Look what I found. This is a list

of all the start-up companies...

...Mark's invested in. Three are

offshore and one's a blind filing.

No board of directors,

a P.O. box for an address...

...and it's been operating at

a total loss in the Bahamas.

ServiceCircuit.

That's not right. I heard about

ServiceCircuit last night.

They're putting

more money into it.

That's part of the con.

We just need to find

the bank he's using.

I was with the board last night.

They seem really happy.

Mark is making them rich!

He's stealing, Kate. Making money

for them is the way he does it.

Kate, what's going on?

Nothing. I just think it's more

complicated than we thought.

You slept with him.

One night, and you go

back to being a Stepford?

What am I supposed to do?

He must have literally

screwed your brains out!

Maybe you just have to forgive

people to move forward.

But he didn't ask for

forgiveness, did he?

If you had something to lose, you'd

understand how hard this is.

Like what, a cheating

husband of my own? Stop.

Things shifted this weekend. It

was different. You don't know.

Really?

What are you doing? Seeing

if Mark wants to hang out.

What's wrong with you?

Everything!

Everything is wrong with you.

And I feel like an idiot

for trusting you over him.

I am done!

Kate, wait.

Nothing from Amber, either?

No. And I feel like if Amber

won't talk to me, then...

...obviously I

did something wrong.

I think you're

being hard on yourself.

I can't tell.

I care so much,

and then it just

comes out so harsh.

You know, what the hell do you know?

You get it wrong all the time.

Sorry.

I'm usually a fun date.

I am.

I'm having fun.

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