The Owl House

Season #1 Episode #11: Sense and Insensitivity

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[Open on Eda's Human Collectibles stand in the market. King holds up a tray of mostly inedible human things.]

King:
Partake of my free snack samples! Take it! I demand it as your ruler, the King of Demons!

[Several people past but none even look at him. He throws the tray on the ground.]

King:
Nyeh! Why isn't anyone paying attention to me? I'm their rightful overlord. Intellectually and such.

Eda:
Yeah...hey! [grabs a passerby by the cowl, sniffs] It reeks more of nerd than money today.

Luz:
Guys!

Passerby:
Ah!

Luz:
You will not believe what's going on! [poses under a banner] It's a book fair! Where books come to life!

[A book jumps off one of the stands next to her.]

Book:
Hello.

Luz:
[screams and kicks it]

King:
A fair without rides?

Boy:
Who needs rides when this [shoves a book in King's face] can take you anywhere?

King:
Nyeh.

[King throws a strip of bacon on the boy's head. A winged demon flies by and picks him up. The boy screams.]

Eda:
A, ew. [throws book on the ground] B, I'm bored. C, I feel like pickpocketing some dork while they browse. [walks off[

Luz:
No, wait! [to King] Will you give it a chance? I'll let you ride in my hoodie!

King:
Ooohoohoohoo!

[Cut to Luz walking through the book fair with King in her hood.]

Luz:
This book fair's got everything! A zine-making workshop, meet and greets, and- what's that? [gasp] A writing competition!? I've always wanted to be a writer.

King:
Writer? What? I thought you wanted to be a witch?

Luz:
Of course I wanna be a witch. But where I'm from that's kinda... impossible. So my runner up dream was to be a writer. [pulls a picture out of her pocket] I've had this about the author picture since I was seven years old. I know my good angle. I'm gonna enter the competition.

Bo:
[laughs as she runs by]

King:
Ugh! What are these basement dwellers doing out in natural sunlight?

Tiny Nose:
Um! We're in line for Jon De Plume, most famous writer on the Boiling Isles, famed author of the Realm Warriors series! I'm gonna have him read my story... and marry me.

[Cut to Jon signing a book.]

Man:
Jon, will you sign my child?

Jon:
I'll sign anything! [laughs evilly]

King:
Such power. Such command he holds over his minions. I must have the same! Luz the human! I too shall enter the competition.

Luz:
Really? [gasps] We could work together! It'll be perfect! We're best friends, so we'll make the best team!

King:
Team! Yes!

[Luz begins walking away.]

King:
My name goes first on the cover.

[THEME]

[indistinguishable chatter]

Eda:
[grabs books and tosses it] Boring, [knocks books onto a child's head] boring. [grabs another book] Boring. [gasps] Another wrinkle! The curse is quickening!

Lilith:
You, lackey.

[Eda ducks behind a banner that says "READ OR... DIE". She lifts the banner and glares at Lilith.]

Eda:
Lilith...

Lilith:
Do you have the item we discussed?

Merchant:
Oh! Yes, right here. [hands her a map]

Lilith:
[opens it] This is excellent. A map to the Bloom of Eternal Youth. I think the emperor will be very pleased.

Steve:
Ma'am, shouldn't we be searching for the Owl Lady to join the coven? Remember that whole plan.

Lilith:
[laughs] My sister's curse has left her frail. She'll still be here when we get back.

Eda:
[groans]

Lilith:
This comes first, it's for the emperor after all

Steve:
Yeah! [knocks over the merchant's books] All hail the emperor!

Lilith:
Very good Steve! [walks away]

Steve:
Shoulder pats for Steve! [walks away]

Eda:
[jumps a table] Hey bub, what'd you sell my prissy sister?

Merchant:
Oh! It's a map to the Bloom of Eternal Youth. A rare flower that only grows once a millennia. Like the name says, it gives eternal youth to whomever holds it.

Eda:
Interesting. So Lilith wants to nab this power for the emperor, huh. Well, won't she be surprised when I get there first and get it for myself! Hah! That'll show her who's frail.

Merchant:
[grins maliciously] Well, we'll see won't we. [opens a drawer to reveal dozens of maps] Can't go without a map of course.

[He hands Eda one. She takes it and opens it, grinning.]

[Cut to Luz's room in the Owl House, where she puts down a large corkboard.]

Luz:
Now, let's write down some ideas that we want to see in the story.

King:
I can write anything?

Luz:
Yeah! [hands him notecards and a crayon] We're brainstorming, every idea is a good idea.

King:
[writing] Mhm! Done! [pins up paper that says "VIOLENCE"]

Luz:
Aw, is that all you want to see?

King:
[holds up paper that says "BLOOD :)"]

Luz:
Hmm.

[Cut to later, with the corkboard mostly full of notecards. Luz pins up three more, reading what's on them as she goes.]

Luz:
Romance! Magic! Heartbreak with shimmer tears. And, the main character is, of course, ahhh, Luzura! [holds up a card with a drawing of herself wearing a pointed hat] I know it's kind of cliché, but what's wrong with cliché?

[She pins her character card to the board. King pins his, a stick figure drawing of himself, next to it.]

King:
Nyeh! And my main character is the King...err...the Ruler of Demons! With this totally original, all-star cast, victory will be ours!

[Luz puts a typewriter onto a desk and sits behind it.]

Luz:
Now for the easy part.

[Cue montage. King stares at the corkboard, now with "ACT 1", "ACT 2", and "ACT 3" on larger notecards in the middle. Luz puts a giant piece of paper over the acts of a drawing of Luzura and Ruler standing in front of an explosion. King and Luz high-five. Cut to Luz writing the following on a chalkboard: "Step 1: Find Cat. Step 2: Endanger Cat. Step 3: Shave Cat (???). Step 4: Book Complete." King nods. Cut to the chalkboard now hanging up and reading "STORY STRUCTURE" with a circle on it, a line cutting it in half, with the numbers 1-8 on it. King gestures to it several times. Luz draws a face on the circle. They both grin. Cut to the floor littered with paper, most of them scribbled over with red. Luz is typing and King is pacing while reading. A banner above them reads "Luzura's Awakening."]

King:
"Luzura's tears fell on the frozen prince, bringing him back to life." Ehhh it just seems kind of unrealistic.

Luz:
I see what you're saying. [stops typing] But in your version, Ruler just destroys everything. I think a little romantic tension could help the scene.

King:
Hey, there's more to life than shipping.

Luz:
Don't you dare insult shipping in my presence!

Eda:
[offscreen] Apprentice! Living room!

Luz:
I'll be back, we'll figure this out, okay writing buddy? [Luz leaves]

King:
[looks at the typewriter] My turn to write!

[Cut to the living room, where Eda is looking at the map.]

Luz:
Hey!

[Eda closes the map.]

Luz:
What's up boss lady?

Eda:
I am popping out for a few days to an undisclosed place to do undisclosed things. You're in charge.

Luz:
Great!

Eda:
No questions!

Luz:
Okay!

Eda:
I said no questions! [closes the door]

[Luz shrugs. Cut back to her room.]

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