The Owl House Page #2

Season #1 Episode #13: The First Day

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Luz:
But all the tracks are so cool! Is there some sort of enchanted article of clothing that could sort this out for me?

Principal Bump:
Well there used to be, but...

[Flashback to Principal Bump holding the Choosy Hat, a brown classic witch's hat, over a young student's head.]

Young Student:
Oh, I'm so excited!

[The Choosy Hat is placed on their head. It turns around, a scarecrow-like face on the pointed part.]

Choosy Hat:
And now... I feed! [brim grows teeth and closes around the student's head]

Young Student:
Aaa!

[Cut back to the present.]

Principal Bump:
[shudders]

Luz:
I don't know if I can choose just one.

Principal Bump:
Then I'll choose one for you. [points to the track banners] Eeny, meeny, miny, moe! Ah, yes! The Potions track. You humans are filled with liquids, right?

[Principal Bump casts a spell that changes the sleeves and leggings of Luz's uniform yellow.]

Luz:
Oh, I guess I have always liked pouring things into other things.

Principal Bump:
I expect you to be on your best behavior. [looks at a corkboard of with pictures of the results of Luz's previous visits to Hexside on it] Based on the costly repairs from recent incidents, we could really use a donation from the Emperor's Coven. Now, off to class.

[He floats Luz through the door.]

Random Student:
*screams*

Principal Bump:
The Choosy Hat! It broke free.

[Cut to Luz entering Potions 101.]

Potions Teacher:
Welcome to a new semester! Let's get stirring! Today we'll make... [grabs potion] fog brews. [smashes bottle on the floor; pops up in front of their desk] Begin!

Luz:
See, potions are fun! [pours test tube into cauldron] You could spend the rest of your life studying this, right?

[Something explodes outside. Luz looks out the window. Willow and Selene are facing off as wind blows. Selene grabs a crystal ball, out of which pops a mummy-like ghost.]

Luz:
The Oracle Track!

[Willow traces a spell circle that she slams on the ground. A carnivorous flower grows out of the ground and hisses.]

Luz:
The Plant Track!

[The ghost and the plant go at each other.]

Luz:
[pawing at the window] Wow!

[Yellow smoke from Luz's cauldron has taken over most of the room.]

Potions Teacher:
Ahem!

Luz:
Sorry! [stirs her cauldron] Sorry.

[The Potions Teacher walks away.

Luz:
[shudders]

Bell:
[inhales, rings smaller dinner bell]

[Everyone leaves class.]

Luz:
Ooh boy! Stirring is the pits. What else is on the schedule for today?

[She pulls out a list reading: "Potions for Beginners, Potions in Motion, Potions (Again), Still Potions, Potions 'Till You Die, Potions After Death".]

Luz:
Oh, man! I'm sorry, elbow!

[Luz looks up. Selene replaces the crystal ball she had used in the battle in a closet and walks away.]

Luz:
A crystal ball. Maybe it can show me if I'm on the right track. No, don't be tempted! It's your first day. Make a good impression. [begins to walk away; pops up at the closet and grabs the ball] Whoa!

Spirit:
[comes out of the ball] You will be in trouble very soon.

Luz:
Wow! Wait, what'd you say?

Principal Bump:
Ahem!

[Cut to Principal Bump dragging Luz through the halls.]

Luz:
But I wasn't studying other subjects! I uh... fog brew! [tosses her potion on the ground, which doesn't work] Yeah. I figured that wouldn't work.

King:
[climbs out of a trash can] Nyah.

Luz:
King! Vouch for my character!

King:
Uh, right! I don't know you!

[Luz glares at King as Principal Bump continues to drag her away. Cut to a classroom with bars on the door, which Principal Bump shoves Luz into. The Detention Teacher looks up from his scroll, and Viney, Jerbo, and Barcus look over at the door.]

Luz:
What is this place?

Principal Bump:
This is the place where all troublemakers go. [turns Luz's sleeves and leggings dark gray] The detention track.

Luz:
[gasps] Nooooo! Detention track? But this can't be possible, I-I thought I--

Principal Bump:
Yes. Actual detention still needs... repairs. In the meantime, I am keeping all troublemakers far away from the eyes of the inspector. You may try for a new track next year.

Luz:
But I'll be back in the human world by then.

Principal Bump:
Maybe you'll do better in human school.

[The door closes as Principal Bump leaves. Luz smiles awkwardly at everyone in the room, then sits at the desk.]

Luz:
Hello, fellow detentioners. Room for one more? [looks around] I like the little spikeys in your hair.

Detention Teacher: Hey! You all better be quiet, unless you want to scrub the classroom again.

Luz:
Hey, don't blame any of them. I'm the one that started talking.

Detention Teacher: Oh hurray. A hero.

[A mop and bucket appear in Luz's hands.]

Luz:
[walks off] Aw farts.

[Viney watches Luz walk off and smiles. Cut to King walking up to a trashcan.]

King:
Time to scrounge through the trash- [yelps]

[He jumps in head first. Inside is an empty box of donuts with frosting rings. King licks the frosting.]

Teacher:
That's it! I'm sick of someone eating all the donuts in the teacher's lounge. I quit!

[A tie is tossed onto King's head. He tries to take it off and knocks the trashcan over, rolling into a classroom while wearing the tie. The students all stare at him.]

Student #1:
Are you our substitute?

King:
Substitute? I ain't no desk jockey.

Student #2:
Look at his professional looking tie! He must be!

King:
Nyah! [hops onto desk] Can it, Fangs! You don't know diddly dang about squiddly squat!

Student #2:
Uh, yes, sir! Sorry, sir! [bows]

King:
Obedience? Well, what is a teacher if not an authority figure? A king of children, if you will. [runs to front of the room] Yes! I am your teacher! You may call me Mr. King!

[King looks at them all in annoyance and starts clapping. The class applauds. King beams. Cut to the detention room, where the Detention Teacher is asleep and Luz is polishing the bars on the windows. A teacher walks past the window outside with younger kids following her.]

Spider Teacher:
Alright, kids. Who wants to go on a field trip to the astral planes?

Braxas:
Yay!

Student #3:
I do!

Luz:
I do.

Willow:
Luz!

Luz:
Oh, my gosh! I missed you so much. Let me squeeze your faces. [squeezes Willow's face]

Gus:
What's going on? We didn't see you in any classes.

Luz:
Principal Bump put me in the detention track for mixing magic.

Willow:
The detention track? You can't do anything in there.

Gus:
You'll learn less than you did before.

Luz:
No, I'm better than this. Please, you gotta help me break out.

Gus:
Don't worry. We'll get you out, dead or alive!

Willow:
[glances at Gus, shakes her head]

Gus:
Okay. Alive.

Luz:
Aw, you guys.

[chair squeaks]

Luz:
It's the teacher. Gotta go!

[She turns around and sees Viney very close to her.]

Luz:
[gasps] It's you!

Viney:
Shh.

[Viney points to the snoring Detention Teacher, then gestures for Luz to follow her. Viney draws a square on the chalkboard with a keyhole in the center, then turns the chalk in the hole like a key. The square glows and swings open, revealing a passageway.

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