The Parole Officer Page #6

- No. No, you'll be fine.

Just step off. Let gravity do the work.

Jeff's at the bottom. I'm right behind you.

- Thanks, buddy.

- Piece of cake.

Come on, Colin!

We need a key to this door!

Piece of cake.

Where's Simon?

'Crikey. He'll be needing some crisps.'

- Toughened glass.

- It's a bank.

Go.

Sorry, Sarge.

In the days to come,

we will make it impossible

for the car to enter Manchester!

The bicycle will be the symbol of a new world order!

Oi!

Hey, watch it!

Come on, you bastards! Move off the road!

Tosser!

We did it!

We've got the money. Let's go!

Do what you like!

I'm taking the tape to get Burton.

- Hello.

- Oh, hello.

- What's on the tape?

- This... is...

A Short Film About Killing by the

Polish director Krzysztof Kieslowski.

A simple story of a man who kills

in the heat of the moment,

then it follows the legal process,

culminating in the man's execution,

which is just as futile as the murder.

And that's the point, really, that killing is wrong.

I've seen it. It's sh*t.

- Mm. Yes, it is.

- Why is it called "Tuesday"?

Uh...

Get after him.

Security! They're on the way.

Get the tape. Take it to Mr Cochran.

I'll finish off here.

Oi! Eh!

You wouldn't hit a man with glasses?

Come here.

Hey, hey, hey, hey!

Hey!

Never mess with an office worker.

Sorry.

Thank you.

Each of these officers being honoured here today

represent the force for good that

I want to see in the 21st century.

They're all people's policemen.

Come here.

One word and you're dead. Now, where's that tape?

Wait!

- Wow!

- One punch.

- Here's your money.

- Thank you.

- We're climbing that mountain.

- Good.

You're all under arrest. Again. Oh, thanks very much.

I was wondering how I'd get hold of that.

Destroy it. You've done the job for me.

He who laughs last, laughs longest.

- You got a secret plan?

- Yes.

- And what's that?

- It's a secret.

Inspector Burton?

- How do I look?

- Crooked.

- Have we got a secret plan?

- No, we're knackered.

- Hello.

- Hello.

- Where are we going?

- You tell me.

I'm very pleased today, not just

cos I'm receiving this award,

but also cos after a long time, this uniform still fits.

Uh, excuse me!

Sorry to interrupt, but I have got a

gun pointed at this officer's head,

so I'm sure you're aware the procedure is to stay calm,

don't inflame the situation and listen.

OK, my name is Simon Garden. I'm a probation officer.

I have been wrongly accused of murder.

I can't believe there are some people

talking at the back.

Shh! Shh!

Please be quiet, or I will shoot her in the head.

Thank you. Right. I am not a murderer.

I know it doesn't look good,

but I'm not capable of murder.

I don't even know how to fire a gun.

But... Hey, you just pull the trigger, right?

Kirsty?

We borrowed this money today from a bank.

It was in a safe deposit box

in the name of Detective lnspector Burton.

Mr Garden, take the gun away

from the young officer's head.

It's OK. I won't pull the trigger... but I might.

Sir, may I?

Explain the money.

This is money that was to be used as bait in a sting

on a drug syndicate I've infiltrated

posing as a corrupt policeman.

You just wasted two years of police time, Simon.

What about the tape?

They've got the policeman

The big, friendly policeman

PC McGarry, number 452

What tape?

Thank you.

It's a long time since I've said this,

but I'm arresting you on suspicion of murder.

Sir, I can explain.

Right, now. I've got the gun,

and as you've seen, I will kill if I have to.

While you're there, put the money in the bag, please.

There should be more than that.

Ow!

If you kill me, you'll be a serial killer.

No!

You have to kill three to be a serial killer.

Sorry. That's just America. It's two here.

Pulling that trigger will achieve

nothing. You'll just look silly.

You need these.

- And these.

- Whoo-hoo! Nice one.

All right. This is a police matter.

We'll take over from here.

- Thank you.

- You're welcome.

I'll look after the money.

- Are you going to let me go?

- I, uh, I lost the key.

Oh, well, that's all right. George?

No problem.

Oh, no. That's a Spear & Jackson spring lock.

You won't be able to get those open till the morning.

Colin?

Sorry. It was just a very beautiful moment.

I'll, um...

Is that, uh... a gun in your pocket?

No, it's my penis.

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