The Pickwick Papers Page #10

particular time of day.

Here I was. And what can I do, Sammy?

You can favor me with a loan of 25 pound.

What good would that do?

Nothing. Unless you was to ask for it back five

minutes afterwards, and I was to say I won't pay and

cut up

rough.

What, to your own father? Shame on you, Sammy.

Well, you wouldn't think of arresting your own son

for

the money or packing him off to the Fleet prison for a

debt now, would you? You unnatural old vagabond,

you?

I always said youll end up in prison,

Sammy, my son.

- Music-

Sam!

Well, if it ain't someone so very Like me as me own

father wouldn't be able to tell us apart.

What are you doing here?

Just visiting, in a manner of speaking.

Visiting? But they only allow my Lawyer to visit me.

Ah, but it's different in my case, sir. I'm a prisoner.

I was arrested this here very afternoon, I was, for

debt.

Arrested for debt?

Yes, sir. And the man that's put me in here said

that youll get out before I do. So I better be off to

finding me self a bed somewhere before I do

anything else.

Bless my heart and soul. How much was the sum?

25 pound.

I'LL pay it.

Ah, begging your pardon, sir, youll be doing nothing

of the kind. And tomorrow morning I'LL be after finding

you a room to yourself.

A room to myself? Is that Possible?

Well, this is the debtors' prison, isn't it?

Anything's Possible if you slip the warders a pound or

two.

Here you are, sir. Youll be Living in the lap of

Luxury here. The best cell in the place, sir.

I thank you, sir. I wish I'd known you were the paying

kind when you first came, and we wouldn't have had

that

Little misunderstanding.

Any Little thing you want, just Let me know.

Don't worry. We will.

Thank you.

Come on, come on. Don't stand here a'gaping.

You've

got work to do.

- Music-

What we need now, sir, is a Little canary bird

a'singing away in the window, a kettle doing Likewise

on

the hearth, and who's to say we ain't in Kensington

palace

itself? It's wonderful what money'll do for you in one

of

these here debtors' prisons, sir.

Wonderful.

Oh, come, give us a Little smile, sir. Go on, it

won't crack your face. That's it.

Is Mrs. Bardell at home?

Who shall I say is asking?

Mr. Jackson of Dodson and Fogg.

Oh! Mrs. Bardell, Mr. Jackson of Dodson and Fogg.

Is anything the matter, Mr. Jackson? Has anything

happened?

Nothing whatever ma'am. How do you do, Ladies?

No bad

news, but our people want you down in the city

directly,

Mrs. Bardell.

Down in the city?

As late as this?

On very important and pressing business, what can't

be postponed on any account. Indeed, Dodson

expressly said

so to me, and so did Mr. Fogg. I've kept the coach on

purpose for you to go back in.

How very strange. I'I just go get my bonnet and

shawl.

- Music-

Prisoner Bardell. Tak her in.

Yes, sir.

He made a terrible mistake. I didn't

sign anything that said I had to pay costs. Oh,

please,

sir, send for Mr. Dodson and Mr. Fogg. Theyll

explain

this is all a mistake.

Well, Well, Well.

Oh.

Well, if it ain't Mrs. Bardell herself. District was in

the poor?

Don't bother the woman. She's just come in.

Not as a prisoner? Who sent her?

Dodson and Fogg.

Not Dodson and Fogg?

Well, I never meant to sue Mr. Pickwick. They put

me

up to it. Truly they did. And after the trial they made

me

sign a paper as a matter of form for the amount of

costs.

And when Mr. Pickwick didn't pay, they had me

arrested.

And now I'm prisoner. I'LL be here all my Life. I'LL never

get out alive. Nobody ever does.

Oh, come on.

I wouldn't be too sure about that.

Ah, Mr. Pickwick, good morning.

Mr. Perker, why bless my soul. What has brought

you

here?

The news, my dear sir, that Mrs. Bardell the

plaintiff is within these walls.

I knew it.

Well, my dear sir, the first question I have to put

to you is whether the woman is to remain here.

How could you ask me? It rests with Dodson and

Fogg.

You know that very Well.

I know nothing of the kind. It rests solely and

entirely with you, sir.

With me? With me?

I say that her speedy Liberation from perpetual

imprisonment rests with you and you alone. Hear me

out,

my dear sir, and do not be so very energetic. I say

that

only you can rescue her from this den of wretches by

paying the cost of this suit, both of defendant and

plaintiff.

I? Pay her costs?

Or Leave her to expire in a scene of misery and

debauchery to which no man should be consigned if

I had

my will. But the infliction of which on any woman is

even

more frightful and barbarous.

You are quite right. I was putting my stubborn

battle with two sharks before my Christian duty to a

misguided creature. Take whatever steps are Legally

necessary, Mr. Perker.

Splendid. I shall. I shall.

We will take it as agreed then, Mrs. Bardell, that you

are prepared to furnish Mr. Pickwick with a Letter in

which you withdraw all claims to breach of promise,

in

return for which Mr. Pickwick will pay all Legal costs

of

your case and you will be released from this prison.

Correct?

Oh, yes, sir. Oh, Mr. Pickwick, how I wronged you.

I've been a wicked woman.

No, no, no, Mrs. Bardell. Just a Little too easily

persuaded, shall we say. I pray you to think no more

of

it. We've all been victims of Dodson and Fogg, but

right as

I knew it would has prevailed. Right as it always

must has prevailed.

Exactly. Well now, Mrs. Bardell, if you will step

outside, I will draw up the necessary documents and

join

you very shortly.

Yes, sir. Bless you, Mr. Pickwick.

Pity the poor debtor. Pity the poor debtor.

- Music-

Pity the poor debtors. Pity the poor debtors.

Mr. Jingle.

Mr. Pickwick. Queer peace. Strange thing. Serves

me right, very.

Have you no boots?

Gone, sir. Man must eat. Lived on them for a whole

fortnight. Silk umbrella, ivory handle a week.

Pawnbroker's shop. Small sums. All rascals.

My poor Mr. Jingle.

No, no, no, sir. Deserve it. Nothing Left now. Lie in

bed. Starve. Die. Inquest. Hush it up. Natural

causes?

Worker's funeral. Deserve it all. ALL over. Drop the

curtain.

Nothing of the sort. I won't hear of it. Here. Take

this. Buy yourself some warm clothes at once and a

good,

hot meal. Now, now. Tut tut tut. Come, come, my

dear

fellow.

Ungrateful dog. Good fellow. Boyish to cry.

Can't help it. Bad fever. Deserved it all. Suffered

much. Very.

- Music-

The sun's smarting my eyes.

That's clever of it, seeing it ain't even out.

- Music-

Where to? Where to?

Why home, of course.

No, to the offices of Dodson and Fogg.

Oh now, my dear sir, Let sleeping dogs Lie.

To Messrs. Dodson and Fogg.

Very good, sir.

- Music-

Just a moment, sir.

- Music-

Ah, gentlemen.

Mr. Pickwick.

Good gracious. Out of prison.

Yes, sir.

What does this mean?

The meaning is very clear sir. Very clear, sir.

Mr. Pickwick, pray Let me explain.

No, sir. Let me explain.

Take care, sir. Let him assault you, Mr. Fogg.

What?

But don't return it on any account.

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