The Pumpkin Eater Page #5

but I don't know...

He was really fond of Jake.

- Jake was fond of him, too.

- I know he was.

I'll never see him again.

I'm glad he wanted to be cremated.

I wish I could believe

I'd see him again.

But I'm glad he'll be cremated.

I couldn't bear

to think of him... buried.

The thought of him under that...

I mean, just the thought...

- Mother.

- Just to think, just to think...

Mother, listen.

I want to tell you something.

- I'm going to have a baby.

- What?

No! You can't.

You're not... You' re not. You can't.

Well, there it is.

But what can Jake be thinking of?

He doesn't know. Nobody knows.

You must be mad.

- Won't you ever get any rest?

- It'll be all right.

How can you be so careless,

and so thoughtless?

How can you want

to start all that over again?

He was so fond of you, he was.

And so proud of you, too.

Only the other night he said we must

go and see your new film, he did.

- Of course, he couldn't go.

- No.

No. Oh, no, he couldn't go.

Oh, dear, there they are.

There they are.

You go and wait in the garden

and I'll...

Thank you, sir.

I'm very sorry to trouble you, sir.

He loved his vegetables.

We never bought

a single vegetable untiI last winter.

He just couldn't manage it any more.

Remember the strawberries,

Dinah?

- You loved his strawberries.

- Yes. They were marvellous.

- I know you did.

- In a few minutes.

- How's things at home?

- Fine.

- Chaos.

- It isn't. All in order.

I don't know what George

would have said if he knew.

Knew? About what?

- You could let this off for allotments.

- He loved the children,

but he always thought

there were too many.

I don't know

what you' re thinking of, Jake.

- What do you mean?

- Are they ready yet?

It's too much.

I'm glad he didn't live to see it.

- Go and find out if they' re ready.

- See what?

- Won't they tell us?

- No.

They might be waiting. Go on, please.

OK.

At least he's going to be cremated.

- I'm so glad about that.

- Live to see what?

On top of everything else.

As if she hasn't got enough.

Mind you, he loved...

he loved the children.

Look, the boys are here.

The boys have come.

They' re ready, Mummy.

Hello, Mum.

Hello. Hello.

Hello.

Dinah.

What do you think of your sister?

Pretty good.

- Everything all right?

- Fine.

Yes, fine.

Come along.

It was when the coffin went

in. You know, when they pushed it in.

I think that's when it was.

I suddenly thought:

well, it might be possible.

You know, God might be possible.

Have you read Thomas Aquinas?

I'm reading a book. It's marvellous.

"That the divine being cannot be... "

Wait a minute.

".. cannot be specified by the addition

of a substantiaI difference. "

- See what I mean?

- Mm-hm.

"Since all things

which are subject to divine... "

- You look awfuI.

- I feeI it.

- You must be tired.

- Mm. And you?

Mm-hm.

- I'm sorry.

- Sorry?

I know you don't want it.

I know you don't want the baby.

Can't be helped.

It will be all right. It will.

I mean, you'll like it.

I mean, perhaps it'll be a girI.

You've never had a daughter.

When the house is ready,

we could spend the summer there,

spread out a bit. I mean...

- You won't notice.

- It really doesn't matter.

It does. It does matter.

You really don't want it?

No.

- What do you want, then?

- It doesn't matter.

- Why?

- Because I don't want it, that's why.

I wanted us to change,

and now we can't change, you see?

I thought we could change,

branch out, be free.

Now we can't.

We' re back where we started.

I'm not blaming you. I blame myself.

It's my fault, I know that.

But we haven't lived.

I don't want it. It'd kill us.

I really thought

that we could begin and...

Remember you used to say that you

wanted to be with me wherever I went,

wanted to go with me everywhere?

Well...

We could traveI. We can afford it.

Even have a proper honeymoon.

Go for a world trip or something.

Now with this,

we' re trapped here, again.

I mean, there is a world apart...

apart from birth.

There's a world apart from...

Look, we don't want any more.

How can we have any more?

Darling,

I know the idea of abortion's

repellent to you. It is to me, too.

It's ghastly, the idea of abortion.

But it would be legaI.

You've been treated for depression.

The psychiatrist says that...

he advises that medically,

for your health's sake,

you shouldn't have this child.

There wouldn't be anything

underhand.

I got you into this

and I just want you to be happy.

I want to get you out of it.

I want to get us both out of it,

while there's still time for us,

that's all.

Now, you' re certain, Mrs Armitage,

that you don't want this child?

Yes. I'm quite certain.

I have, in fact, already had a long talk

with your doctor

and your psychiatrist, Mr Ingram.

We all appear to be in complete

agreement on this matter.

We do consider that,

by having this child,

your health would be

severely affected.

But we also feeI

that we should point out

that the reasons for recommending

that this pregnancy be terminated

must apply with equaI validity

to any future pregnancy.

Do you see what I mean?

You've had

a considerable number of children.

Perhaps it would be wise for you

not to have any more.

It's, um... It's a matter of sterilisation.

Perfectly simple and straightforward.

And afterwards, you can live

a completely normal married life.

But, of course,

you'll never conceive again.

What did my husband say?

Oh, he left the decision

entirely to you, of course. As we do.

Oh, darling, be carefuI.

You'll hurt yourself.

- I'm so happy.

- Good.

I'm free, you see.

- I'm free, aren't I?

- Yes, I know.

Completely free.

We don't have to worry

about it any more.

It'll just never happen. We don't

have to worry about it any more.

Never.

Oh, I'm going to get rid

of that nanny, for a start.

I've always hated her.

Then we can move to the country,

to the new house...

Yes.

.. and live with the children again,

properly.

And then we can

go away together, hm?

And just do anything.

And just do anything.

Yes.

- Be carefuI. Be carefuI.

- Yes.

- Hello, Mummy.

- Hello, darling.

- I brought you these.

- Thank you.

They don't stand a chance

with these others.

- Ah, yes, they do.

- Look at them!

Whew!

- Who are they all from?

- Oh, mostly friends of Daddy's.

- Are you feeling better?

- Marvellous.

- How are the children?

- Oh, fine.

It was a sort of womb thing,

I suppose, was it?

Yes. Something like that.

Does it happen to everyone?

No.

Of course not.

- It just happens to some women?

- Mm-hm.

Oh, look, help me make this list.

- We'll make a clean sweep.

- What list?

There'll be some changes.

We' re going to do things.

- What?

- Moving things to the new house.

- All that junk in the attic?

- All that junk.

- Not all!

- Put it down!

- How?

- " Move junk to the new house. "

We'll buy furniture for the new house.

Lots of new furniture.

- Send everything to the cleaners.

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