The Rear Guard Page #2

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You and your group are

holding German prisoners?

Now look, Rosatti, don't do anything

foolish. Just stay right there.

Colonel, could you speak up a little bit?

I can't hear you with all that thunder.

Listen carefully, Rosatti.

The bridge is washed out,

and I won't be able to send my

men over 'til tomorrow morning.

You mean, you want us to

keep the prisoners all night?

Yeah, give them a blanket each, bed them

down and give them something to eat.

But, but, sir we're in a church.

All we can do is scrape up a few wafers.

Send out for some sandwiches.

Oh, yes, sir. Should I put them all

on one, or is that separate cheques?

The army will reimburse you,

Rosatti. Goodbye.

The first captured Germans

on American soil,

and they wind up with those Civilian

Defence yoyos on Long Island.

I really think you ought to cut

the buttons off their pants.

That's what Teddy would do.

- Yeah, yeah, OK Wagner.

I gotta talk to these prisoners.

Prisoners, attention!

I gotta say they're

pretty well-disciplined.

That's not discipline.

They're just a country full of robots

led by a lunatic who

looks like Charlie Chaplin!

I'm making a note of

your insults, Sergeant.

Your name will go on the list,

and when we win the war,

you will be brought to account.

You can put down whatever you want,

but you're not going to win this war.

- Oh, yes we are...

- Oh no, you're not...

- Oh yes we are...

- Oh no you're not...

# Adolf Hitler is a jerk,

# He's nothing but a Nazi

# He thinks that he will win the war...

# He's not so hotsy totsy...

Your name will also go on the list.

What is it?

- Don't tell him, Henderson.

- Henderson. Thank you, Captain.

You know what you

can do with your list.

Captain Rosatti, I was trying to

keep you off, but you asked for it.

Rosatti. Is that two 'T's or one 'T'?

- Two 'T's.

Mr Raskin, can I tell the German

Captain I was only joking?

- Get up there!

- Come down here!

See? You think you got trouble?

Henderson. We gotta get some

sandwiches for the prisoners.

Go over to my cousin Mario's restaurant.

Hold it. You can't feed them from

your cousin Mario's restaurant.

I ate there last week.

- So?

Under the Geneva Convention you cannot

give the prisoners cruel

and inhuman punishment.

Why don't I go to Greenblatt's

kosher delicatessen on the corner?

For the Germans?

The kosher deli will be fine.

All right, get six salami sandwiches.

I would like corned beef.

- All right. One corned beef...

- Lean.

- ...and five salami.

- Just a minute.

Make that three corned beef,

two salamis and a tongue sandwich.

Hold the mustard on the corned beef.

- Henderson!

Go back to the original order:

Six salami sandwiches.

On white bread, with mayonnaise.

The hell with the Geneva Convention.

- Captain Rosatti?

- Yes, Wagner.

May I leave the room?

You've already gone four

times in the last hour.

Not bad for a man of 70.

I want you to stick to your post.

See what I mean, father? I told you,

you can't keep prisoners in a church.

Let Father Fitzgerald decide that.

I am the custodian of this church,

and I say throw the blockheads out.

And they can take their prisoners

right along with them.

Now, Mr. Muldoon...

You shouldn't have been permitted

to use this hall in the first place.

Mr. Muldoon, we've all got to do

our part for the war effort.

What's the matter with him?

- I feel sick.

It must have been the kosher salami.

Anybody would get sick

eating kosher salami in a church.

- Stay away from that prisoner.

- You can't just leave him lying there.

I don't trust him, Father.

Henderson, you look sharp.

You, keep him covered.

Krupinski, watch him like a hawk.

Crawford, over here.

Raskin, draw your side arm.

I'm going in.

Yeah, this whole thing

looks pretty fishy to me.

Oh, what are you afraid of, he's unarmed.

Yeah well, he seems to be

breathing pretty good!

All right, nobody move!

Nehmt das Machine Gun her!

You'll never get this!

That troublemaker Muldoon.

It's all his fault.

He got us into this.

It won't be long now, they're bound to

crack. We're holding all the trump cards.

Hold your fire, men.

All right, c'mon on out.

Are they ready to surrender, Father?

Well, I've got a message from the Captain.

He wants you to take him and

his men back to the fishing boat,

so they can make a rendezvous

with another U-boat.

He's out of his mind.

If you don't agree to his terms, he's

going to blow Mr Muldoon's head off.

It's the first good news we've had all day.

We must be charitable, Mr Raskin.

But if they get back to Germany,

they'll get another U-boat,

and start sinking our ships again.

The kid's right. It's Muldoon's

life against thousands.

Boy, that's a tough decision to make.

Yeah. But I say, let bygones be bygones,

and we'll send flowers to his funeral.

Well, Mr Rosatti?

Tell him I need some

time to think about it.

I'll tell him.

- Well?

- He's thinking it over.

Thinking it over?

I give him until dawn.

Father, what do you think my chances are?

I'll light a candle for you.

Rosatti, Ro-

Rosatti, it's morning already.

If we could only get

that gun away from him.

Wait a minute.

What are we worried about?

If this group is marching through town

with a bunch of German prisoners,

it's going to attract some attention.

Somebody is bound to call the army.

- Gee, that's brilliant, Mr Crawford.

- Of course.

Okay, that's worth taking a chance.

Okay in there, you Germans,

we're ready to listen to your terms.

Even if they get on the

boat, the coastguard

will stop them before

they clear the harbour.

I'm glad you have come

to your senses, Captain.

Nimm das Machine Gun und hau sie scharf.

Drop your rifles.

Captain Rosatti, you will put

your men into formation.

All right men, line up.

Wagner!

You won't get away with this.

We're bound to attract attention

marching through town

without our rifles.

No one will interfere because you will

be escorting us with empty rifles.

You've thought of everything, haven't you?

I certainly have. Take off your

jacket und unbutton your belt.

- Now wait a minute...

- Do as I say.

I have taken the liberty of borrowing

one of your hand grenades,

which you were kind enough

to already have primed.

That's right, I primed them all myself.

What are you going to do?

What are you going to do

with that hand grenade?

- I am going to put it down his pants.

- Oh no!

You will march in front of me.

One false move, und I pull the string.

What a way to go.

Captain Rosatti, you are our leader.

Put the grenade in my pants.

Thanks, Wagner. Thank you. You see

the kind of man this country produces?

Ja. Stupid ones.

Raus!

You think you are so smart.

You'll be picked up by the United States

Coastguard before you clear the harbour.

He's right. You'll never get away.

I think we will, because all of your

men will be on the boat with us.

We shall leave behind the priest

and dumkopf to tell them.

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