The Royal Tenenbaums Page #3

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and I aim to do it.

Will you give me a chance?

No.

You speak

for everyone?

I speak for myself.

Well, you've

made your views known.

Let somebody else do some of

the talking now.

What do you propose to do?

I can't say, really.

Um, make up for lost time,

I suppose.

First thing I want to do is

take you out to see

your grandmother, at some point.

I haven't been out there

since I was six.

I haven't been out there at all.

I was never invited.

Well, she wasn't

your real grandmother

and I never knew how much

interest you had, uh, sweetie.

Anyway, you're invited now.

Thanks.

You know, Rachael's buried

out there, too.

Who?

My wife.

Oh, that's right, isn't it?

Well, we'll have to swing

by her grave, too.

Uh, I'll be right back.

Chas.

Chas.

Can I see my grandsons?

Why?

Because I finally want

to meet them.

Don't give me that guff.

I think we'll pass.

Pagoda...

where's my Havelina?

I'll say good-night

to you now, children.

Dad.

Thank you, my sweet boy.

I'll contact you

in the next 12 hours

with further instructions.

Look at that old

grizzly bear.

Hello, Ethel.

Good evening, sir.

Hold the cab,

will you, driver?

Royal, this is Henry Sherman.

Hey, lay it on me, man.

How do you do?

Not too well. I'm dying.

How's Richie?

I don't know.

I can't tell.

Yeah, me neither.

He wrote me a letter.

He says he's

in love with you.

What are you talking about?

That's what he said.

I don't know how

we're supposed to take it.

Hang on.

Hello.

Sugar, it's Eli.

Hey, baby, give me a second.

What are we doing, Eli?

Oh, I just got to pick

something up.

Don't repeat that, by the way.

About Richie.

It was told to me in

confidence, and, you know...

Good.

Now just remove the loose soil

and note the

decomposition levels.

I'm sorry to interrupt

your work.

Don't be silly.

Come on.

I just want to apologize

for the other day

when I proposed to you.

Why?

I thought it was very sweet.

I know I'm not as accomplished

as some of the men

you've been involved with.

Uh, Franklin Benedict,

General Cartwright,

and your ex-husband.

Oh, that's ridiculous.

But, but, I feel...

I can offer

just as much as them.

I know I went about it

backwards, but...

Henry, I have no interest

in Franklin Benedict

or Doug Cartwright...

I never did...

and as far as Royal's concerned,

he's the most...

Henry?

Henry, are you all right?

Yeah, I'm fine. I'm fine.

Anyway, let me know

when you make up your mind.

Henry, wait a second.

I'm sorry, I'm very nervous.

Th-That's okay.

Oh, thank you.

Why are you so nervous?

Well, to tell you the truth

I haven't slept

with a man in 18 years.

# Dah-dah-dum #

# Dah-dah, dah-dah, dah,

dah-dum #

# Dah-dah, dah-dah-dah #

# Dah-dah, dah-dah, dah... #

# La-dah-dah-dah-dah,

dah-dah... #

# Lah-dah-dah-dah-dah,

dah-dah... #

# Dah-dah, dah-dah-dah-dah... #

# Dah, dah-dah-dah,

dah, dee... #

# Dah, dah-dah-dah-dah,

dah-dah-dah... #

# Dah-dah, dah-dah... #

That's a hell of an old

hound dog you got there.

What's he go by?

Buckley.

Buckley, sit.

You know who I am?

I'm Royal.

Have you heard of me?

I'm very sorry for your loss.

Your mother was a terribly

attractive woman.

Thank you.

Which one are you?

Ari.

Uzi, I'm your granddad.

Hello.

I'm sorry we haven't gotten

to know each other.

I don't get invited around

very much.

What do you think of that,

by the way?

Oh, you...

you don't have to say anything.

It's kind of a "f*** you"

to the old man, I guess.

How's your daddy?

Fine.

You think so, huh?

How often has he got you

working out?

Do me a favor.

Tell him you want to meet me.

But we just met.

No, we didn't.

Look, I'd like us to have

a relationship

but we have to pull some strings

to make it happen.

Now, here's what you tell him.

You say...

Well, I bet

Mom would have wanted us

to meet him before he died.

Wouldn't she?

Don't you think?

She was a tough old broad,

wasn't she?

I wouldn't know.

Excuse me. Come on.

Oh, that's right.

We've got another body

buried here, haven't we?

Uh, hold on.

Take some of these.

Come on.

So what do you think

of this big, old black buck

moving in up there?

Who?

Henry Sherman.

You know him?

Yeah.

Is he worth a damn?

I believe so.

What happened to your finger?

Uzi, shh.

It's okay, I'll tell you.

I'm adopted. Did you know that?

Well, I am.

When I was 14, I went to find

my real family.

They live in Indiana.

All right, now, just set one

of them hickory trunks

right up top there,

sister Maggie.

Did you try to sew it back on?

Wasn't worth it.

Hell of a damn grave.

Wish it were mine.

It's a shame, isn't it?

What?

Well, you probably had another

good two or three years

of competitive play in you.

Probably.

I had a lot riding on

that match, you know.

Financially and personally.

Why did you choke out

there that day, Baumer?

Mr. Gandhi leads 40-15.

That's 72 unforced errors

for Richie Tenenbaum.

He's playing the worst tennis

of his life.

What's he feeling right now,

Tex Hayward?

I don't know, Jim.

There's obviously

something wrong with him.

He's taken off his shoes

and one of his socks

and... actually,

I think he's crying.

I think you're right.

Who's he looking at

in the friends' box, Tex?

That's his sister, Margot

and her new husband,

Raleigh St. Clair.

They were just married

yesterday, Jim.

Oh, yes.

I've never seen anything

like this.

Neither have I.

Strange day out here

at Windswept Fields.

I kind of disappeared

after that, didn't I?

Yeah.

But I understood.

I know you're not very good

with disappointment.

You still got that little BB

in your hand, Chassie?

Why did you shoot me?

It was the object

of the game, wasn't it?

No.

We were on the same team.

Were we?

Well... you sued me.

Twice. Got me disbarred.

I don't hold it

against you, do I?

And how is it possible

for Mr. Tenenbaum

to withdraw these funds

without your written

authorization?

Objection, Your Honor.

Damn it, I...

Why don't you leave

the objections to me, Royal?

Because I started the

corporation when I was a minor.

So, my father

was the primary signatory

on most of my accounts.

He also stole bonds

out of my safety deposit box

when I was 14.

You think you could

start forgiving me?

Why should I?

Because you're hurting me.

Come on.

Were you in prison?

Kind of.

Minimum security.

I got jacked by the IRS.

Should we split?

Yes, sir.

No, call me Mr. Tenenbaum.

Okay.

No, I'm kidding; call me Pappy.

Okay.

Come on, let's shag ass.

Well, just let me know

if you need somebody

to talk to, okay?

I like Raleigh very much.

I know he's a lot older

than you are

and you two are having

some problems

but... anyway,

maybe I can help.

Okay. Thanks.

Hey, Baumer! All right!

All right! Ha!

Oh, sh*t! Oh, Jesus.

By the way, I heard about

that letter you sent to Eli.

You dropped some cigarettes.

Those aren't mine.

They just fell

out of your pocket.

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