The Russians Are Coming, the Russians Are Coming: The Russians Are Coming to Hollywood Page #3

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Muriel said the Russians have landed.

Whateverthat means, Chief.

And she said they were

attacking her personally.

Remember when she called

about that Peeping Tom,

you know who that was?

- Luther Grilk's horse.

- l rememberthat, Chief.

You handle it, will you?

Just go ahead and call her.

No, no, that's not a good idea.

Walt, if all those men are in town, with

guns, and they're desperate, somebody could...

l mean, anything might happen.

Ah, nobody's gonna do anything. Nobody!

- Tell the police they took our car.

- l will.

We have to find it before we go. lt's not ours.

While you're there, call the plumber.

-All right!

- Turn off the water. We're leaving...

Now, listen, if l'm not back in 20 minutes...

What? lf you're not back in 20 minutes, what?

lf l'm not back in 20 minutes, nothing.

l'll be back just as soon as... l'll be right back!

Of all the unbelievable... l've got work to do.

l've gotta get that second act finished.

- You look silly on a girl's bicycle!

- Pete...

lf you want to hit him, it's all right with me.

You're riding for a fall, buster.

You're riding for a fall! You are!

- Hit him!

- Now, get back.

Just get in!

You change Annie, l'll start packing.

Muriel?

lf that's the way she wants it,

that's the way it's gonna be.

Vern, why don't you answerthat telephone?

Mattocks here. Who's that?

Awfully sorry to be bothering you again,

but l think something really is happening!

- Did you talk to her?

- l tried, but Muriel's line's dead.

l ain't a repair man. lf you got trouble

with the lines, call up Ed Spooner.

- But Chief, Muriel Everett said...

- l know what she said.

She said that the Russians had landed.

She said the Russians landed in West Village.

Alice, come on, forthe love of...

How could they land in West Village?

Ain't nothing out there but sandbars.

Couldn't they drop in parachutes?

How many lines out?

Oh, the whole circuit. lt's just dead!

All right, l'm up.

l said l'm up. Whatever's going on, l'm up.

Now, while l'm getting dressed,

call Norman and Charlie and Les and Oscar.

Oscar Maxwell. Tell 'em l said

to get overto the office right away.

Oh...Alice. Tell them l said they'd

better bring their guns, all right?

-Yes, Chief. Should l call the state police?

- No, no.

- l don't want them.

- Should l call the coastguard?

No, Alice, nobody. Just...let's find

out what's goin' on first, huh,

if there is something going on,

before we start spreading around lots of lies?

OK, Chief.

The Russians have landed.

They have landed in West Village

and they're attacking the postmistress.

They're attacking Muriel Everett.

Vern. Vern! Where the hell...?

Brrrm! Brrrm!

l'll get it. Will you eat?

- Oscar Maxwell speaking.

- Chief Mattocks wants you right away.

- Bring your gun -that's an order!

- Bring... bring my gun?

- Gun?

- Well, what's happening?

- What's... what's going on?

- Russians!

- Russians?

- Russian parachutists!

Muriel Everett reported

that Russian parachutists...

- A Russian parachutist on Gloucester lsland?

- That's right!

- Russian parachutist?

- Russians!

Get my gun!

Where's my gun? Should be here.

- l moved it.

-You shouldn't have!

Can't you understand this is an emergency?

lt won't be there, those are my things!

You're a great help.

Just get this thing... That isn't right.

l'll get it. Where'd you put my badge?

- lt's here.

- Phew!

Can't get this thing fastened.

l... Ouch!

- Will you watch what you're doing?

- l'm sorry.

Norman? What about me? What should l do?

Just stay at home. Stay in the house.

- But if you're gone?

- My cap. Kids, why do they put these things...

Listen, kids. Pay attention. This is very serious.

There's an emergency.

Chief just called me to the station.

Listen to your mother. Pay attention to her.

Don't go outside,

or nearthe windows, understand?

All of you stay in the cellar. Understand?

- Mm.

- OK.

-Where are my boots?

- Norm, suppose they come here.

Suppose they start burning and looting.

- Norm.

-Yeah?

- Suppose they start...raping!

-What? l don't know, Sarah.

Way l see it, you could kick up

a fuss and probably get killed.

Or you could clear out

when you see them coming.

- Clear... clear out?

-Yeah.

Norm? Clear out where?

The ferry isn't even running! This is Sunday!

Norman? Norman?

Where are you going, Norman?

Norm?

- Morning, Norm. What's going on?

- They're reporting the Russians have landed.

- The Russians, and they've landed...

- Russians? Holy jumpin'...

They must be coming in at the airport.

lt's the only way.

Look, will you get out of the way?

Get out of the way. The Chief

just called me. l've gotta get there.

Sarah, get back in the house

with the kids.

- Yes, Norman.

- You too, lsaac.

Did he say they've captured the airport?

The Russians have captured the airport?

l don't know, but there's

some kind of general alarm out. Oh!

Hey, Porter! Do you know what's going on?

They captured the airport!

There's a general alarm out!

Muriel?

- Muriel?

- Muriel?

Ah.

Muriel? Muriel?

Muriel? Muriel?

Where are you, Muriel?

Wha...? Muriel!

What are you doing up there?

Holy mackerel, girl!

What was it? A stick-up?

- Muriel!

- The Russians, Papa. The Russians!

What you doing

hanging up there on the wall?

Onward Christian soldiers

Marching as to war

With the cross of Jesus

Going on before...

Handel! Handel!

Nyet Handel. Tchaikovsky.

Get a hold of yourself. Calm down.

- Don't pani...

- Chief, what's going on?

- What happened?

Take it easy. All l know is

Muriel called Alice Foss

and told her

the Russians have landed.

She said the Russians had landed,

and they were attacking her personally.

Attacking Muriel Everett?

Why, that's just plain crazy, Chief. That's crazy!

Anyway, she hollered to Alice

about getting attacked,

and then her line went dead.

Aah!

Aah! Aah!

Hey, what... what's going on?

Who are you, boy?

Walt Whittaker. We're staying out at...

Whoeveryou are, you better get moving.

Whole dang island's under attack

by Russians. We're leaving.

-You're what? Wait.

- Can't wait. We're getting out.

Wait a minute. What happened here?

- Those Russians are just...

- They're all over Gloucester lsland.

Those Russians are not...

Hey, wait! Wait a second!

Hey, listen! Listen!

Listen, those...

Hey, listen! Those Russians are not...

- Hey!

ls there anybody...

Why doesn't somebody do something?

- They're at the airport.

-Why doesn't somebody do something?

Suppose, my foot.

There ain't any Russians anyway.

-Yeah?

- But just in case there are.

What are we supposed to do, Chief?

My wife is just about outta her mind!

l'll tell you what we do.

We shoot 'em, that's what we do.

No, we're not gonna shoot anybody.

Can you call back, Vern?

What are you trying to do? Start a panic?

There's people all overthe streets already,

running around, screaming.

That's right, Chief. Some even have guns.

lf we can just keep this thing quiet. Quiet...

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