The Secret of My Succe$s Page #3

No,no,no,no. That's

Transportation's problem.

No, we do not supply drivers

for executives' wives.

We are a messenger service.

I don't care if the other

drivers are all busy.

Yeah, well, the same

to you, sweetheart.

Hey, Dartmouth,

get over here.

Executive's wife wants

a ride up to Litchfield.

Check out a car

and drive her.

Oh, where's Litchfield?

You'll find it.

Just follow

the smell of money.

Excuse me, ma'am. I'm not

quite sure which way...

Turn the key,

start the car,

put it in drive

and step on the gas.

Any idiot can do that,

even my husband.

Excuse me, ma'am. I know I'm

not supposed to consort...

Then don't.

It's just that

you seem kind of upset.

I was wonderin' if there

was anything I can do.

I don't know.

My cook quit this morning.

My analyst is away on vacation.

My Mercedes broke down.

I split my nail,

and my husband is screwing

somebody at the office.

What did you have

in mind?

Stick of gum?

Ha,ha,ha!

This is the third weekend

in a row he's found an excuse

not to come

to the country.

No, I don't know.

But knowing him it's probably

some teenage airhead

from the steno pool.

The last one I caught

him with was so dumb

she thought dictation

was some kind of S and M trip.

Do you know my husband?

I'm sorry.

I can't hear you.

Never mind.

Didn't hear a thing.

I'm gonna have

to call you back.

I'm so mad, I could spit.

He looks twice as good today

as the day we were married.

I just look twice as old.

Are you kiddin'?

You look...

Well, I just hope that

when I'm his age,

I can wake up

every morning

and find a woman as beautiful

as you are lying next to me.

Thank you.

Oh, yeah

Oh, yeah

Oh, yeah

Oh, yeah

Oh, yeah

Oh, yeah

Beautiful

Oh, yeah

Oh, yeah

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Turn in here.

Please.

Bring those inside.

Charles.

- May I help you with those, sir'?

- Yeah. Thanks.

What are you drinking?

I can't really.

I have to get back.

God, I hate the country.

Yeah, I can see how you'd

be real miserable here.

Who can live

with so many trees?

They suck up

all the oxygen.

No, actually,

trees produce oxygen.

Who are you?

Mr. Wizard?

What did you say

your name was?

Brantley.

No,no,no.

I mean your first name.

That's it. Brantley.

Well, Brantley, I don't know what you

want out of Pemrose Corporation,

but I'll tell you

what you do not want.

You don't ever, ever wanna

become a corporate wife.

I'll watch my step.

Have another.

Mmm.

Thanks.

I've run 8,000 miles

on that tennis court

chasing a fuzzy, little yellow

ball with an oversized racket.

Do my legs look

heavy to you?

No.

I've swum laps from here

to the moon in that pool.

Do you see anything in

this body that isn't firm?

Tennis, swimming,

aerobics, jogging, massage.

Anything and everything

to stay in shape,

not that he'd ever notice.

So, Brantley, do you know

why I stay in shape?

How 'bout a dip in the pool?

No, wait!

Are you serious? Listen, uh...

Look,I have

to get back.

Listen, this is a tempting

diversion, but I got a job.

I don't know if this

is such a good idea.

Transportation,

please.

Yes. The young man from the

mail room who drove me home?

He's going to stay here and do

a little work in my garden.

See that he gets full

credit on his time card.

Thank you.

Help me out of this,

will you, dear?

Whew!

That was great.

Thanks.

I swim five miles a day.

Supposed to tone my ass.

Yeah, it works. Oh!

Just when I thought it was

safe to go back in the water.

Ha!

Ohh!

Whoa! You sure this

is a good idea?

It's okay. I know the owner.

Last one out of the...

You sure your

husband's not coming home?

Who knows?

He could be home any minute

or several hours from now.

Oh, my God. Oh!

I'm going to see that my

husband gives you a leg up.

I think we've done pretty well

so far by ourselves.

I mean Pemrose.

Uh... No.

No, thanks.

No, I'm gonna make it

to the top by myself.

Oh. God, you're adorable.

Mmm!

I could spend a week inside

those sweet, unwrinkled eyes.

Can I make

a personal observation?

Anything but the thighs.

Somebody sold you

a bill of goods

and convinced you

you had to be 21 forever.

That's bullshit!

I think you're terrific.

I think the only thing wrong with

you is your husband is a jerk.

You're beautiful.

You're intelligent.

You're sensuous.

Say that again!

Which part?

All Of it!

Oh, no!

What? What is it?

It's the jerk.

My husband.

My uncle.

Your what?

Oh, God!

That makes you...

Auntie Vera?

Oh... Oh!

Oh, God! Ow!

God! Oh, God.

What's my mother

going to say?

I've disgraced

my whole family.

Oh, the hell you did!

Not funny! Okay? This is not

a funny moment in my life.

Oh, relax, Brantley.

Who's going to find out?

I'm home!

He's gonna find out.

That's who's gonna find out.

Don't worry!

He won't fire you.

There's no way I'm gonna get a

raise out of this.

Vera, what's the company

car doing in the driveway?

It broke down, darling. The driver

had to take the train back to town.

No, he didn't, darling. He's in

here having trouble with his fly.

Get back! Do you ever stop? No!

How am I gonna get home now, huh?

You wanna tell me that?

Maybe we'll just have to

keep you here and adopt you.

You're a riot, Vera.

Sh*t.

Please, Lord,

get me out of this.

I'll go all over the world telling

people not to screw the boss's wife.

What are you

doing in here?

Feeling romantic.

Oh.

What's for dinner?

Oh, Howard!

You really know how to sweep

a girl back onto her feet.

Go back!

Sit! Sit down!

You look like death on a cracker, man.

What happened to you?

I was chased by

a 200-pound dog

with a mouth

as big as my head.

And that was the best thing

that happened last night.

What was the worst thing?

I got laid.

I'm not sure you got your

priorities straight, Brantley.

Oh! Hold the elevator.

Good morning.

Hi.

The light

ls in my eyes

How can I see through

What do I hold on to

This time

I've got to find

Everything and more

'Cause that's what

I'm fighting for

We're entering

a sensitive zone.

The guy in that office,

he just got canned.

The mail room knew about it on Friday.

He just found out today.

Seems like the world

is upside down

Don't know where

I'm going to

But you know

I'm turning it all around

It's just something

I've got to do

No one knows

what I feel inside

Don't you know

that I just can't hide

I'm going to see that my

husband gives you a leg up.

No, thanks.

No.

No, I'm gonna make it

to the top on my own.

And if rules have to break

Whatever it takes

I know that it's my time

It seems like

the world is upside down

I might have to

break some rules

You know you've got to try

You know

I'll turn it all around

It's just something

I've got to do

It's something

I've got to do

Um... Hello.

Tucker, where the hell

have you been, huh?

We got a problem in

Midwest Distribution.

What are you

gonna do about it?

What's,uh.

What's the problem?

Our stock is down another

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