The Sheik and I Page #5

IT'S JUST VERY

SALVATIONAL TO ME, YOU KNOW.

IF I CAN ONLY MAKE THIS FILM

OR MAKE IT GOOD,

EVERYTHING WILL BE OKAY.

IT'S LIKE, I'LL BE SAVED.

IT'S ALMOST RELIGIOUS.

WHEREAS IF I DON'T SUCCEED

OR IF THE FILM IS THWARTED

LIKE I FEEL DAMNED OR

EVERYTHING IS BAD.

IT'S NOT JUST LIKE ONE

THING IS BAD, EVERYTHING

IS BAD AND LIFE HAS NO MEANING

AND I FEEL WORTHLESS.

I HAVE LOW SELF-ESTEEM,

I THINK, IS THE TRUTH.

SO FILMMAKING GIVES ME SOME

SELF-ESTEEM BUT WITHOUT IT,

I DON'T HAVE ANY.

AND THEN, WHEN I WAS

AT THE FERRIS WHEEL,

SORT OF LIKE LOCATION

SCOUTING OR WHATEVER,

JUST LOOKING AROUND,

I NOTICED THAT THERE

WAS THIS BANQUET.

NO, WE JUST WANT TO LOOK

AT THE FERRIS WHEEL.

YOU CAN GO THERE?

YES, WE WANT TO LOOK AT IT.

JUST LOOK AT IT. YES.

[ZAHEDI]

SO I THOUGHT, WELL,

I WONDER IF ONE OF THOSE GUYS

IS THE SHEIK OF SHARJAH,

LIKE HE MIGHT BE THE SHEIKH

OF SHARJAH RIGHT THERE,

LIKE IN THE SAME SPACE BU I COULDN'T REALLY GET TO HIM.

WHAT WAS I GOING TO DO,

INTERRUPT HIS BANQUET?

EXCUSE ME.

[CHUCKLES]

WHAT I LIKE ABOUT THIS IS

IT'S SO WEIRD AND RANDOM

THAT WE STUMBLED UPON THIS.

I FEEL LIKE IF I COULD FIGURE

OUT A WAY TO INCORPORATE

THIS RANDOM EVEN INTO THE NARRATIVE, RIGHT?

SO,

WELL, ONE OF THEM COULD JUS BE THE SHEIKH OF SHARJAH

AND WE DO SOMETHING WITH HIM

BUT IT'S KIND OF FUNNY

THAT THEY'RE ALL THERE, RIGHT?

IT WAS LIKE A BANQUET.

LIKE EVERY YEAR,

THEY HAVE LIKE A,

ALL THE SHEIKS GET TOGETHER.

[MAN]

[ZAHEDI]

BUT...

ALL THE SHEIKS ARE KIDNAPPED

AT THE SAME TIME.

AND IF THEY KIDNAP ALL OF THEM,

IT COULD BE WORTH A LOT.

[MAN] YES.

THEY WANT BETTER

WORKING CONDITIONS.

THEY WANT THE RIGH TO BECOME CITIZENS

AFTER 30 YEARS.

[MAN] THAT'S GOOD.

I KNOW.

[WOMAN] SUPER.

HE'S GOING

TO GET FIRED.

OR LIKE MANSOUR IS LEADING

THIS LIKE PAKISTANI-LED LABOR

RESISTANCE THING.

ALL THE INDIAN KIDS.

[WOMAN]

ALL THE INDIAN KIDS.

[MAN]

WE COULD JUST LIKE USE

THEM AS, LIKE,

THIS ARMY OF CHILDREN.

[WOMAN]

OH, YOU GUYS ARE MAKING

IT SO POLITICAL THOUGH.

THAT'S SO SCARY.

[MAN]

PLAYFUL, ABSURD WAY.

[ZAHEDI] AND SOMEHOW,

WE FOIL THE PLOT.

BECKETT, SOMEHOW,

IS INSTRUMENTAL.

[MAN]

BECKETT LEADS ALL

THE CHILDREN AGAINST HIM.

AND THE SHEIKS,

IN GRATITUDE FOR SAVING

THEM FROM THE RANSOMERS,

CHANGE THE LABOR LAWS.

[WOMAN] WOW.

[MAN]

YEAH.

[CHUCKLES]

I REALLY WANTED:

THE SHEIK TO PLAY THE SHEIK,

AND I THOUGHT, OH, WELL,

THIS WOULD BE WHAT I ASK

THE SHEIK--

YOU KNOW, ASK HIM IF HE'LL

PLAY HIMSELF IN THE MOVIE,

AND I ACTUALLY WROTE

HIM A LETTER:

AT SOME POINT, ASKING IF HE'D

BE IN THE MOVIE,

AND THERE'S NO ANSWER.

EVERY DAY, I'D SAY,

WAS THERE ANY ANSWER?

NO, THERE WASN'T AN ANSWER.

SO AT SOME POINT I ASKED

THIS GUY AND I THOUGH

THIS GUY LOOKS AMAZING,

JUST HIS FACE WAS SO BEAUTIFUL

AND STRIKING AND HAD A GLOW,

LIKE A SPIRITUAL GLOW

THAT I THINK YOU COULD FEEL.

THERE'S SOMETHING

SPECIAL ABOUT THIS GUY.

ALLAHU GOD? ALLAHU.

[MAN] ALLAHU? ALLAHU.

[CHATTERING]

[ZAHEDI]

YES, I KIND OF KNOW.

I'VE BEEN LIVING

HERE FOR A WHILE.

HE DOESN'T BELIEVE

IN THAT STUFF.

[SPEAKS NATIVE LANGUAGE]

OKAY, NO PROBLEM.

OH, YEAH? GREAT. DO YOU KNOW

HOW WE CAN REACH HIM?

NO, I DON'T KNOW.

SURE.

YEAH, OKAY.

ZERO, FIVE, ZERO...

ZERO, FIVE, ZERO...

ALSO, WE NEEDED KIDNAPPERS.

SO THERE WAS THIS GUY NAMED

HEMADI WHO WAS AN ARTIS

FROM IRAQ AND HE HAD A STUDIO

RIGHT NEXT DOOR TO WHERE COLIN

AND MICHAEL WERE STAYING.

AND WE THOUGHT HE'D

BE GOOD FOR THE KIDNAPPER.

NO SHE'S NOT BEING IT.

IT'S THE SHEIK.

SHEIKH OF SHARJAH.

OH.

SHEIKH OF SHARJAH

IS BEING KIDNAPPED.

YOU CANNOT REPLACE

ANOTHER BODY FOR THIS?

NO, WE WANT YOU.

MAN, DO I LOOK

LIKE I'M A KILLER?

HOW I, WE COULD NEVER.

YOU LOOK GREAT.

- YES?

- YEAH.

HE SEEMED EVIL.

LIKE HE HAD THESE

LONG FINGERNAILS

LIKE AN EVIL PERSON

IN A SILENT MOVIE

OR SOMETHING.

SO I THOUGHT,

"HE'LL BE GOOD," AND ALSO,

WE'RE TRYING TO FIND

ANOTHER KIDNAPPER.

AND WE FOUND THIS GUY.

WE WERE SHOOTING ANOTHER SCENE.

ACTION!

AND AS WE'RE SHOOTING THIS,

THIS GUY COMES UP TO US.

HE WANTS TO ACT IN THE MOVIE.

OKAY.

I AM EGYPTIAN.

GREAT.

WELL, ACTUALLY, RIGHT NOW.

ACTION!

HE CAN DO A DOUBLE.

GREAT.

THANK YOU.

AND I FELT FOR HIM.

I KNEW HE WANTED

TO BE IN THE MOVIES.

YOU GUYS HAVE ANY IDEAS

FOR WHAT WE COULD USE

THAT EGYPTIAN GUY FOR?

I THINK HE LIKES TO DO STUNTS.

YEAH.

HE COULD BE THE STAND-IN

FOR ANY OF OUR CHARACTERS.

BUT, YEAH, WE SHOULD

THINK OF SOMETHING...

YEAH.

HE SAID HE LIKES--

HE CAN FALL.

WHAT WAS HE SAYING?

DID YOU CATCH IT?

SHOULDN'T HE BE

ONE OF THE...

RANSOMERS?

RANSOMERS.

YEAH.

AND THEN THE POLICE TRY

TO CATCH HIM AND HE LIKE--

YEAH,

HE'LL FALL ON HIS BUTT.

ROLL, ROLL OVER,

JUMP OUT A WINDOW.

HE'S THE ONE

THAT GETS AWAY.

ALL THE OTHERS:

ARE CAPTURED,

AND HE'S THE ONE

THAT GETS AWAY.

AND WE JUST SEE HIM

GOING AROUND A CORNER.

OKAY.

SO WE'RE FILMING CAMILLE

GETTING HIT BY THE CAR.

AND THE KIDNAPPERS ARE DRIVING

THE CAR BECAUSE THEY'VE JUS

FLED THE SCENE OF THE CRIME

WITH THE RANSOM MONEY.

SO THEY'RE GOING TOO FAST.

AND CAMILLE IS TRYING TO CROSS

THE STREET, AND SHE THINKS

IT'S SAFE, AND IT USUALLY

IS BUT THIS TIME,

IT'S A KIDNAPPER,

SO SHE GETS HIT BY THE CAR.

WATCH OUT.

AND THE KIDNAPPERS JUMP OU AND THEN BECAUSE THEY HIT HIM,

THE POLICE COME:

AND THEY GET ARRESTED

OR SOMETHING.

SO THAT WAS BASICALLY OUR--

OUR STORY LINE.

AMD THE SAIN WILL PLAY THE SHEIK

AND THEY'LL PAY THE KIDNAPPERS,

AND WE'RE GOOD.

READY, BECKETT?

YES.

OKAY, HOLD HIM.

WHEN I SAY "ACTION,"

LET HIM GO, OKAY?

OKAY, GO.

ACTION!

RUN, RUN, RUN,

RUN, RUN, RUN!

COME ON, BECKETT!

COME ON, BECKETT!

BIG GROUP.

FASTER, FASTER!

OKAY.

GIVE ME THE GUN.

SO WE DO THE SAME THING

AGAIN BUT WITH MANSOUR

INSTEAD OF BECKETT.

I FIRST.

I FIRST.

SO THE BASIC IDEA

IS THAT HE PLAYS

THE SHEIKH OF SHARJAH.

OKAY.

IN THIS SCENE.

THERE'S OTHER SCENES

WHERE HE DOESN' PLAY THE SHEIK.

HE PLAYS OTHER CHARACTERS.

BUT IN THE SHEIKH OF SHARJAH

THING, HE GETS KIDNAPPED.

YES.

AND, I GUESS WE HAVE TO TIE

HIM UP WITH SOME ROPE.

YES.

FIRST STANDING,

AND THEN TO A CHAIR.

AND THEN:

THESE RANSOMERS COME

AND THAT GUY AND THAT GUY

PLAY THE RANSOMERS.

OKAY.

AND HE'S GOING

TO BE AT THE TABLE.

AT THE BANQUET.

AND THEN WE NEED A SCENE

WHERE HE SIGNS A LAW

CHANGING THE LABOR LAWS.

HE SIGNS A MORE PROGRESSIVE

LABOR LAW INTO EFFECT.

WHAT KIND OF LABOR

LAW DO YOU MEAN?

OH, THE IDEA IS LIKE,

YOU KNOW,

INDIANS WHO COME

TO WORK IN SHARJAH--

YES.

YOU KNOW, THEY CAN' BECOME CITIZENS. RIGHT?

SO THEY'RE GOING

TO CHANGE THAT.

YEAH,

THEY GAVE US A PERMIT.

- YEAH?

- YEAH.

AND THE SHEIK IS FUNDING

THE BIENNIAL.

OKAY.

AND HIS DAUGHTER

IS THE PRESIDEN OF THE BIENNIAL.

OH, OKAY.

YEAH, BECAUSE YOU'RE INVOLVING

THE SHEIKH OF SHARJAH.

RIGHT, RIGHT, RIGHT.

YEAH, SO WE JUST WAN TO BE SURE THAT IF IT'S--

I WILL JUST ASK KAJISAN,

OKAY?

YEAH.

THE SHEIKH OF SHARJAH BASICALLY,

I'M TOLD, OWNS SHARJAH

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes