The Snake and Mongoose Chronicles: Episode 1 Page #5

You know, I've never seen

the back of your car.

Look at it now. Get used to it.

Where the hell

is McWhorter, anyway?

- He's up in the tower, man.

- All right.

Mr. McWhorter.

Happy days, Don.

Happy days.

Here it is.

It's all there.

The hell it is.

You still owe me 100. Remember?

You stiffed Donny for 100 bucks?

Cheapskate. Shame on you.

Pay this man his C-note.

Now I know why

they call you the Snake.

I may have a little bit

of trouble reading, Mr. McWhorter,

but I know how to add.

And Tom McEwen

takes the win and the match.

God damn it.

Hey, yeah, all right.

Thank you.

Oh, I like this one here.

I like this one.

All right. All right.

- Hey, what the hell happened, man?

- The tranny blew.

Once the slicks got covered,

I almost lost her.

Barely keep her on the track.

Hey, well, you did a good job,

you know, keeping it togeth...

Damn it, Don,

that's 300 bucks, man.

For the shoes?

You know what?

Don't worry about it.

It's only money.

There's plenty more

where that came from.

- Great show, boys.

- Thank you.

Oh, Tom, here's your $500 bonus.

- All right.

- Bonus?

Yeah, just like we agreed.

You guys put more

than 5,000 people in here,

winner gets an extra 500 bucks.

Just like we agreed to, Tom.

You are nothing but a...

Whatever you say,

don't say "snake," pal.

Did I say something wrong?

No, Mac. You're good.

Hey, nice shoes.

Thank you.

Are you kidding me?

- Hey.

- Hey.

Don, Tom is spending

way too much money.

Fancy restaurants.

Expensive clothes.

He's always had money, so he's a

little better at spending it.

Yeah, well, he's now spending

our money too, Don.

You know what?

The guy's been pretty banged up

since Judy left him,

so he's driving like crazy,

spending like crazy.

- Split the damn accounts.

- Great minds think alike.

- Yeah.

- Okay.

Got you something.

What?

It is the anniversary

of our first date.

Torrance.

Rainbow Roller Rink.

Saturday night.

It was Friday night.

- Friday night.

- Mm-hmm.

You always had to be up for work

so early on Saturdays.

Sorry.

But, damn, could you skate.

I still can.

Found a bunch of these

rags laying around.

Oh. Yeah.

Thought I'd take a little page

out of your playbook.

Hey, did you know

that sponsors love publicity?

- God, Don.

- It's crazy.

- You're such a...

- What? I'm a snake, Torn?

You look like a giant banana.

He's around here somewhere.

Eric, Don Prudhomme.

All right, you guys

have a good night.

- You too. You too.

- All right, buddy.

Ah, man. Thanks.

Somethings gone terribly

wrong with Don Garlits' dragster.

Looks like the entire front

has been sheared off of the back.

Safety teams are on the scene now.

- What a horrible mess.

- You hear about Garlits?

No. What happened?

He break another record?

No, no, no.

A real bad crash at Lions.

Clutch exploded,

blew off half his right foot.

Oh, man. He going to keep his leg?

I don't know. Am I a doctor?

Oh, I hope not.

No, Garlits is a machine.

He's going to be back

driving within the month.

I can hear him at the hospital

giving 'em hell, right?

"You don't race, you don't eat."

Yeah, it sounds like Big Daddy.

You know, he could

have been killed.

You guys act like he broke

his damn nail.

Well, accidents happen.

I mean, it is what it is.

Is that what you think, Don?

I don't think about it, honestly.

I just drive.

- Come on, Lynn.

- Okay. That's great.

Oh, don't forget the old briefcase.

Hey, hey, hey, now. Hands off the...

that's not for you, Don.

For Christ's sakes!

The two of you need to grow up.

Y'all think this is just

all one big game.

Lynn... Come on, Tom.

Yeah, grow up.

You're killing me here.

- Lynn.

- No.

Hey, Jamie. How's it going?

- I miss you, man.

- Miss you too, Dad.

I thought we were coming to Denver.

Yeah, yeah, that was the plan,

but I guess things changed.

Besides, you guys are probably

having a better time out there.

It's okay. You winning a lot?

Hey, yeah, I'm winning a lot.

I could sure use

my best mechanic, though.

Well, listen, bud, I got to go,

so give Joey a kiss for me,

and tell your mom I'm going

to call Tommy tomorrow.

Okay, Dad. Miss you. Love you.

Yeah, I love you too, buddy.

I sure do miss you guys.

Hey, you all right?

So what the hell happened?

- What the hell happened?

- 'Cause you know what happened.

- Yeah, I pushed too much.

- Yeah.

Keep wasting time

with those girls, 'Goose.

I like winning.

Whoa!

- Hey.

- Good job.

- Good job. Here you go.

- Aha.

- Yes.

- You know what?

They say hard work pays off, buddy.

What do you think?

You know, I told you

not to run those 430s, Tommy.

You can see what happens when you

don't hit your shift points.

You know what I mean?

It's like dropping a hand grenade

down in the middle of the motor.

You're killing parts.

You know that.

I got to push it sometimes, Ed,

roll the dice.

If I want any chance of beating Don,

I can't always play it safe.

"Roll the dice."

Okay.

What?!

No, I can't hear you. Would you...

I have to see my boys, Judy.

Tom McEwen.

- Last call for Tom McEwen.

- Damn it, I got to go.

I know Joey hates the track.

Just send Tommy and Jamie.

Sh*t!

There you go. For you.

- All right, let's take this.

- Great win, Don.

- Tom.

- Hey.

Now what's this I hear about you

not racing Indy next weekend?

No, Don and I are running.

We're just not running the funnies.

We're going to both go after

the Top Fuel championship.

What does that mean for Mattel?

Well, it means the funnies

will have to stay in the trucks.

Also means I get to defend

my Top Fuel title.

We have $100,000 invested in

this team to race funny cars.

And what have you made back,

about 10 times that?

It's true. They've been

our fastest sellers.

Oh, hey, which one's

selling faster, me or Don?

Don's outselling you by just a bit.

- Ah, well, how much?

- Listen, for Pete's sake,

try to focus on what I'm saying.

This is a million-dollar deal.

A million dollars?

Next Christmas, we're coming out

with a brand-new Mongoose

and Snake drag race track set,

and we are going to be dumping

a huge amount of money

into an all-out advertising

campaign starting this weekend.

I need those cars on the track,

and I need one of you two

to win the funny car class.

Yeah, well, you don't tell us what

we can and can't do, all right?

That's not how this works, Art.

No, what he's saying

is that we're not magicians.

Like I told you

a long time ago, Art,

we can't control

the outcome of a race.

Just get those cars on the track.

Or what?

Didn't you read your contract?

Yeah. Of course I read my contract.

They own us outright, don't they?

At least until the

contracts expire.

I mean...

so much for owing no one

and no one owns you, right?

We all owe someone, Don.

But maybe we can get

a little more out of this.

Here. Hand me that pen.

Give me that, please.

Give... Easy, tiger.

- We can do that later.

- No, I got to get into it now.

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