The Snake and Mongoose Chronicles: Episode 1 Page #4

Okay, man.

Hell, you're the talker.

Talk to 'em.

I already did.

How the hell did you manage that?

My stepfather.

Joe? Joe doesn't

even like you, man.

Yeah, well,

they want to see me again,

with you, the Mongoose and Snake.

That's what this is.

You want Snake to come in

and close the deal for you?

- Okay.

- That's just fine, buddy.

Let's do that. Set it up.

I already did.

I'll pick you up at 9:00

tomorrow morning.

All right, man.

And, Don, wear something sharp.

Still can't believe

you're wearing that.

Shh. Man, I'm cool.

Sometimes you got to show

a little class, Don.

Yeah, you're all class, Tom.

Yes? Can I help you?

Yeah, we're here to see Art Spear.

You must be Mr. McEwen

and Mr. "Produm."

Prudhomme.

Mr. Spear is ready for you.

- Follow me, gentlemen.

- Laugh it up.

Thanks, Betty.

Thank you.

- Nice to see you again, Tom.

- Hey, Art. Hi.

So you must be

the Snake part of the equation.

- Is that right?

- Don Prudhomme.

The Mongoose and Snake...

that's what the fans call us.

Right. Sit down.

Tell me again, Tom.

How can we all work together?

Hot Wheels.

Now, you hype them

as the fastest cars on Earth.

Yes, and we're actually doing

very well with them.

Ah, Larry.

Gentlemen, this is Larry Wood,

our Hot Wheels design guy.

Larry, this is...

- Mongoose and Snake.

- Hey, hey.

You know these guys?

Oh, sure. Sure.

See, what if you could combine

the fastest toy cars on Earth

with the fastest

real cars on Earth?

And you can do this?

Mr. Spear, we are this.

Take a look here.

Brought some photos here for you.

Now, see here.

These are the animals.

- These are our logos here.

- Right.

This is me here and Don, okay?

Larry, are these guys for real?

Snake's won

the U.S. Nationals twice.

Yeah. That's the Super Bowl

of drag racing.

- Uh-huh.

- Yeah.

Oh, for the past four years,

Don and I have been

the hottest ticket

in what is the fastest-growing

sport in America.

Without even trying,

we pack the stands every weekend,

either together or separately.

What you have in your office right

here is the biggest draw in racing.

Now, together, as a team,

sponsored by Mattel Hot Wheels,

driving cars with the Hot Wheels

logo big and bold on the sides,

well, hell, we're

200-mile-per-hour billboards.

Drag racing attracts more kids

than any other kind of auto racing,

more than stock cars or sprints,

hell, more than the Indy 500.

Why? Because we're fast.

And we're flashy

with fiery burnouts.

Hell, instant winners.

Kids can walk the pits,

meet the drivers.

- You know, hell, we're...

- Accessible?

You're damn right we're accessible.

We are in real life

what Hot Wheels is in miniature.

- And there's TV coverage, right?

- For the big events.

So our logo gets across the finish line

first in front of millions of viewers?

- Damn right it does.

- Well, we can't guarantee

one of us will win every time.

It'd be better if you did.

How much funding do you think

you'd need to pull this off?

Oh...

100 grand should be enough

to build two funny cars,

record-setting cars, of course.

Funny cars?

Oh, there it is.

- Yeah.

- Very cool.

- That's it right there.

- Look, guys.

Oh.

Well, trophies are fine,

but I'm looking for branding.

I want every kid in America

to buy Hot Wheels.

Not just to know the brand,

but to love it,

like...

well, like Barbie.

Mr. Spear, you put these

cartoon characters on the cars,

and you watch the kids go nuts.

The more I think about this...

the more I like it.

So he just keeps a Barbie

sitting in his desk like that?

I guess so.

But, brother, we're about

to become a team, the team.

Well, what do you think

about Wildlife Racing as a name?

I mean, you're the Snake.

I'm the Mongoose.

- Kind of makes sense, right?

- Wildlife Racing.

Hell, the way you drive,

I guess that does make sense.

Very funny.

- Whoo-ee!

- Let's get 'em buttoned up, boys.

- Watch the merchandise.

- This is the real deal here, Donny.

Chop-chop. Let's get out of here.

All right,

let's line up real quickly.

Let's go, guys. Don. Don.

Tommy, let's go.

Spear wants a photograph.

- Let's line it up.

- Hey, lose the cigarette.

Now that Coke's a sponsor,

they want one too.

- Ready for this? Look good.

- Here we go.

- Right this way, girls.

- Shake my hand.

Look pretty. Here we go. Smile.

Don, smile.

- Hey, baby.

- Hey, Mike, is that big voice

we hear at the track

your real voice?

- You mean this one?

- Yeah, that one.

No. Actually,

this is my real voice,

you little whippersnapper.

You like it?

- You're so bad.

- Yes, I am.

- Buddy, you're right.

- "Super Stock," huh?

Oh, look at that.

We're on the cover.

Oh, look at that.

Your name's first.

It's 'cause I'm prettier.

Ah, hell, come on.

You said you didn't care

about any of that anyway.

- Yeah, I didn't.

- Uh-huh.

Will you two stop arguing?

Here, Don. Make yourself useful.

Uh..

Hey, Don, can't wait to see

your new Hot Wheels cars.

Are they going to be

the same as the big cars?

Oh, yeah, buddy.

They're going to be identical,

just a little smaller.

- Ready?

- Ooh!

Scared me.

Hey, baby.

- Where are the boys?

- At your mom's.

I thought they wanted

to see me off.

We need to talk.

What? I kind of thought

we already did.

Me being alone with the kids,

it's not working.

I need you at home, Torn.

Well, I can't make

a living at home.

Yes, you can.

You just don't want to.

Now wait a minute. Wait a minute.

You knew who I was when we met.

I thought you would change.

Baby...

we are finally getting

everything we always wanted.

This is everything

you wanted, Torn.

This is your dream, not mine.

I... I'm just not cut out for it.

What about us?

The kids?

They'll visit when they can,

and you can see them

when you're in town.

Good-bye, Tom.

Hey, Tommy!

Get the show on the road.

You all right?

Ah, I will be when I beat

your ass in Bakersfield.

Sunday, Sunday, Sunday.

See the new Hot Wheels team...

Tom "The Mongoose" McEwen

take on the two-time

U.S. Nationals champion

Don "The Snake" Prudhomme in a

best-of-three all-out match race.

You've seen the stunning pictures

of their red and yellow haulers

and their hot, new funny cars.

Now see them actually race these

beauties for the first time ever,

live and in color at the

world-famous Famoso Raceway.

Don't miss it.

Come out to Famoso Raceway

this weekend

and prepare to be amazed

as their nitro-burning funny cars

go roaring down the tracks

at over 200 miles an hour.

You okay driving that, Don?

Yeah, you feeling good?

Pull that thing

on the other side, will you?

All right, thanks.

Hey, you boys got enough room?

- Yeah, it looks pretty good.

- It's all right.

McWhorter said you superstars

take as much room as you need.

Oh, man, you hear that?

First stop, we're already superstars.

Hey, Snake. Snake, big fan, man.

- All right.

- Big fan.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, only fan.

Don't get too used to that, pal.

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