The Teahouse of the August Moon Page #10

What in the name...?

What?

I see you, Fisby.

Fisby, I see you.

Where are you?

Where are you? Where are you?

Fisby. Fisby.

Come out here. Come out of here.

Come out of here.

Sit down!

How many lectures have you delivered

to the village children on democratic theory?

- Well, now, let me see, sir.

- Four, five?

No, no, no, it wasn't that many.

- Three?

- No.

Two?

No, no.

You've only delivered one lecture?

None, sir.

Don't tell me you haven't delivered

a single lecture?

Yes, sir, I've not delivered no lecture.

Any lecture.

Have you organized a League

for Democratic Action?

Yes, sir, I did that. I sure did.

I sure did that, sir.

How many lectures on democratic theory

did you give them?

- None, sir.

- You can't mean none.

- You must mean one or two.

- No, just none.

- I refuse to believe it.

- I'm very glad, sir.

- Sir, I must go.

- Where?

My seedlings are wilting.

I have to transplant them.

Captain, you'll pack your gear

and transplant yourself to your unit at once.

Yes, sir.

They'll die.

This is murder.

Please, take care of my beans.

Now, is the schoolhouse finished?

No, sir.

Why isn't it finished?

Well, we haven't started.

What did you do with the lumber I sent?

We built a teahouse.

I don't suppose

you have any aspirin here?

I... No, I don't think so.

What in the name of occupation...

...do you mean by saying

you built a teahouse?

Lotus Blossom, she had to have a place

to teach the League geisha lessons, sir.

- Fisby!

- Yes? Yes, sir? What?

How could you sink

to such depths, man?

Well, I was only giving in to

what the majority wanted, colonel.

I don't doubt that statement, not at all.

It's a sad thing it took a war to convince me

that most of the human race is degenerate.

I thank my stars I come from a country...

...where the air is clean,

where the wind is fresh...

Oh, for heaven's sakes, sir.

Nothing goes on in a teahouse

that your mother couldn't watch.

You be careful how you use

my mother's name, Fisby!

My mother, then, sir.

Sir, there's nothing immoral

about our teahouse.

Answer me this, what is bringing all that

occupation money to this village?

- Well, answer it.

- No, no, no. It's nothing, nothing.

- It might be for me. Answer it.

- It's not, you see...

- You see, this phone, it rings all day.

- Then I'll answer it.

Hello?

What do you want?

Who is this?

Commander Myers,

you must have a wrong connection.

This is not a brewery.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes. Oh, I see.

I see.

I see.

Well...

There was nothing else

that we could make...

...that anybody would want to buy.

Brandy.

This ends my Army career.

And I promised Mrs. Purdy

I'd come out a general.

You've broken

a fine woman's heart, Fisby.

I'm sorry. I'm very sorry.

You've sullied the reputation

of your nation and all the tears...

All right. Shall I kill myself?

Oh, don't minimize this.

You don't know the enemy's genius

for propaganda.

Well, what have you done with

all the money you've made so dishonestly?

I banked it in Seattle.

That's despicable.

Making a personal fortune off the labor

of these ignorant people.

I haven't touched a cent

of this money, colonel.

Now, it's banked in the name

of the Tobiki Cooperative Company.

See, everybody in the village,

they're all partners, don't you see?

You know, share and share alike.

That's communism!

It is?

I'll be lucky to get out

of this war a private.

- Captain Fisby...

- Yes, sir.

...you will consider yourself under arrest.

You'll proceed to HQ at once

to await court-martial.

I intend to wipe this stain

from our country's honor.

- Gregovich!

- You called, sir?

I did.

Yes, sir.

We have business to attend to here

before going to Awasi.

Yes, sir. I'm glad to hear it.

Captain, may I congratulate you

on what you've done for this village?

- It's a dream.

- Thank you, very much, sarg...

It's an alcoholic dream!

It's one vast distillery.

Take a detail and some axes

and smash every still in this village.

Destroy them?

Beyond repair.

Take another detail

and rip down that teahouse.

- But, colonel.

- Pile the lumber beside the road.

That's an order. Do you understand?

Yes, sir.

I know.

Hot water.

Boss. Sorry, boss.

Jeep all loaded now.

I'll be along in a minute, Sakini.

You going to take

Lotus Blossom with you?

Sakini.

Ask her for me if there's anything

that I can do for her before I go.

Ask her.

What did she say, Sakini?

She say she want to marry you, boss.

Now, why...?

Why would she want to marry me?

She say you nicest man

she ever seen, boss.

Oh, no, no, no.

No. You tell her for me that I'm clumsy.

I got...

I got a talent for destruction.

I'd only disillusion her...

...just the same way

I disillusioned all her people.

She say she like to go

to America, boss...

...where everyone happy, sit around

and sip tea while machine do work.

Tell her I'll never forget her.

I'll never forget this village...

...and on the other side of the world

in the autumn of my life...

...when an august moon

rises in the east...

...I'll remember what was beautiful...

...and what I was wise enough

to leave beautiful.

She say, boss, she never forget you.

She like you to know that she gonna

make up a long song-story about you...

...to sing in the teahouse.

And she say maybe in 100 years

from now...

...you gonna be famous

all over Okinawa.

I'd like that. I'd like that.

Oh, he sure want to push

her wheelbarrow for her, boss.

She say okay, but not to think

that she's his property.

He very happy fellow, boss.

She going now, boss,

but you still her boss...

...so she say she not go

till you drop fan from face.

I've written a full report of this whole affair

to your commanding officer.

I'm only glad you don't belong

to my outfit.

I won't tolerate rotten apples

in my barrel.

Hello.

Who?

What?

When?

Sit down, captain. Sit down. Sit down.

Make yourself comfortable.

Sit down. Give me your hat.

Have some of these tsukemonos.

Take your shoes off. I'll be right back.

- Going now, boss?

- Yeah, I guess so, Sakini.

Hey, boss, since you

not take Lotus Blossom...

...maybe you take me.

No, Sakini, no.

I work for you

for half price, boss.

Major McEvoy is coming down here

to take charge...

...and, well, he's going to

need your help, you know.

You very hard man

to bargain with, boss.

Okay, you want,

I work just for rice ration.

No.

You mean you gonna make me

work for nothing, boss?

I mean, yes, you're not going to

work for me at all, Sakini.

- No, you belong here.

- Okay, boss.

Boss, you know what I think gonna happen

when American leave Okinawa?

No, what?

I think we gonna have to use...

...a pentagon-shaped schoolhouse

for teahouse.

So long, Sakini.

You're a rare rascal.

So long, boss.

Say, you know, I'm gonna miss you.

- Hey, boss.

- Yes?

You not failure.

I'll tell you something, Sakini.

You know, I used to worry a lot

about not being a big success.

I think I felt an awful lot

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