The Titfield Thunderbolt Page #2

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- Sundays excepted.

You... You wouldn't tease

an old man, would you?

Mr Weech, you wouldn't joke

about a sacred subject.

I am assured

it will be quite, quite legal.

You can write your own timetable.

My very dear sir,

you can write your own cheque!

Hallelujah!

- (Cheering and laughter)

- Set them up, Miss Hampton!

(Horn honks)

- Morning, Tom.

- Morning, sir.

- Morning.

- Morning, sir.

- Morning, Mr Clegg.

- Morning.

Titfield branch line.

British Railways are prepared to sell.

These people are determined

to run it themselves.

That is their intention.

You will be conducting an official

inquiry at Mallingford next Tuesday.

It's going to be tough.

Bound to be a lot of local opposition.

- Amateurs running a railway.

- There is.

You will ascertain whether or not

such opposition is justified.

(Children cheering)

- You know, Sam, this is serious.

- Scandalous! Gross libel!

Yes, but we are amateurs.

Amateurs?

(indistinct chatter)

- Come on up, Mr Weech.

- I say, Ben. You are a brick!

- Did the guard see you?

- No, I don't think so.

- Come in, Mr Chesterford.

- Thanks a lot, Joe.

- Driver didn't see you, did he?

- I don't think so.

That's the lot.

- Open her out, Ben. May I?

- Steady, now. Steady.

(Train whistle blows)

(Horn honks)

(Whistle blows)

(Whistle blows)

(Horn honks)

(Whistle blows and horn honks)

Faster, Alec. Faster.

(Whistle blows)

(Horn honks)

(Tyres screech, car honks horn)

It's safer by road!

(Whistles blow)

In view of the very grave dangers

of a privately run railway,

I feel the only solution to

the problem is a privately run bus.

Hear, hear!

(Cheering)

(Ruddock) Quiet, please.

All right, so it all boils down

to a question of safety first.

There's no doubting the fact

that the Titfield people as a whole

are somewhat disturbed at the idea

of an amateur-run railway.

I don't know, of course, how many

have...reasons of their own

for opposing it.

I do wish I could be sure

of one impartial view.

I think I can provide that, sir.

As town clerk here,

I am able to keep a close touch

on the pulse of local opinion.

It is my public duty to say

that the opposition does arise

from a genuine doubt

as to whether

these gentlemen

can provide a safe service.

If you decide that they can...

I have recently taken a course

of private tuition as an engine driver.

- I'm learning how to be a guard.

- Where, how and who from?

And who may you be, sir?

The name is Coggett, Mr Coggett.

I'm here to enter a protest

on behalf of the National

Association of Railway Workers.

I see. What is the nature

of your protest, Mr Coggett?

My association would take

a grave view of the proposal

to employ staff in disregard of

the scale of wages for railway workers.

Tell us where we can get some.

We'll use them at full union rates.

My association is not

an employment bureau.

It is concerned only to prevent

the exploitation of cheap labour.

- But we want to be exploited.

- It doesn't matter, brother.

It's what the bosses want

that we're out to stop.

We ARE the bosses.

In our company, there's no quarrel

between capital and labour.

My association will view

any such situation as exploitation.

- (Crowd murmurs)

- Thank you, Mr Coggett.

As an old railwayman myself,

I cannot help sympathising

with those who want to keep

this line in operation.

I see that they're ready

to make every effort

to fit themselves for their duties.

But, in their enthusiasm,

I don't think they realise as clearly

as the rest of the community

what a very big responsibility

it would be.

If I were to grant the order

they've applied for,

I think they might find,

in a few weeks' time,

that they'd taken on more

than they could manage.

I do not feel justified in recommending

that they should be granted...

(Cheering and applause)

You're condemning

our village to death!

Open it up to buses and lorries

and what will it be like in five years?

Our lanes will be concrete roads.

Our houses will have

numbers instead of names.

There'll be traffic lights and zebra

crossings, twice as dangerous.

Go by bus! We're not asking

for a monopoly, like you are.

All we're asking for is the chance

to keep our train running.

Mr Blakeworth, you spoke frankly.

You said people were scared of our

idea. Perhaps you're one of them.

But give us a chance

and we'll prove we can do it.

Just give us this one chance, sir.

It means everything to our village.

- We want to run the railway.

- Bravo! Bravo!

(Cheering)

Thank you. I was about to add

that I do not feel justified

in recommending their order

should be made permanent,

until they've had a chance

of proving their capabilities.

I shall recommend

that they'll be granted

a probationary period

of one month.

After which, an inspector of railways

appointed by the Minister

shall report whether or not the efficiency

with which the line is run

justifies the said order

being made permanent.

(Laughter)

? For he's a jolly good fellow ?

?For he's a jolly good fellow... ?

Sing while you can, you poor fools.

You won't last a week!

(Cheering)

- Morning.

- Morning, sir.

Better than housework, Mrs Davies?

- Splendid, Mrs Stanley! Morning!

- Morning, Mr Weech.

- Good morning, Fred.

- Morning, vicar.

Morning, Mrs Anstey. Hello, Joan!

- Morning.

- Good morning.

(Blows whistle)

Well done, everybody.

Time for evensong.

Right-0, that'll do. Pack it up.

Pack it up.

(Alarm rings)

(Clock chimes)

(Cock crows)

(Birds sing)

Walter, do you know

what time it is?

- Yes, my love! Summer double time.

- Come back!

(Cock crows)

Where's Dan? He should have

been here half an hour ago.

That lazy good-for-nothing?

You didn't ought to mix

with the likes of him.

He ought to have had the fire lit.

Our first run and we shall be late.

My dear Seth! Don't tell me

you've been here all night?

When I do a job, sir,

I like to do it proper.

- A-ha! Good old Seth.

- Morning, Mr Weech.

- Have you seen Dan?

- No, I haven't.

Half a dozen gin, two of whisky

and a firkin of beer. That do you?

For the week, I hope!

Our very first day. We can't fail!

No, girl. No.

Our technique here

is a little different.

Get to Dan's place

as fast as your legs can carry you.

Send him back here at the double.

Tell him it's vital.

(Alarm ringing)

(Alarm muffled)

(Knocking)

Are you there, Dan?

Dan! Dan!

Get out of bed this minute!

Get up!

' Aargh! Grr!

Oh.

All right! Don't go panicking

like an amateur.

- They're coming!

- How many?

Six, and Mr Blakeworth's with them.

- Only another three minutes.

- I know.

(Bell rings)

- You rang, sir?

- Mallingford.

- Season?

- No, no, no. Day return.

I want to see how they get on first.

There you are, sir. Thank you.

A-ha! Well, Mr Blakeworth.

A memorable day, sir!

It will be if this train

departs on time.

The law compels it. Landlord's

in danger of losing his license.

Merciful heaven! We've made it!

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