The Wackness Page #2

Are you that Luke?

Ah!

# I used to get feels

on a b*tch #

# Now I throw shields

on the dick #

# To stop me

from that HIV sh*t #

Who is this?

Dis are the new sh*t.

Biggie.

# Biggie Smalls is the illest #

- This sh*t is dope.

- Dis cat gonna change your world.

# The thrill is gone The black

Frank White is here to excite #

# And throw dick to dykes #

# B*tches

I like 'em brainless #

# Guns

I like 'em stainless steel #

Everything cool, boy?

- I could use a little more this week, Pers.

- How much more you want?

- Like another five Zs.

- Oh, boy! You got big aspirations, Luke.

No, just a lot of debt.

Okay, soldier.

Be careful out there.

Dis blood clot Giuliani got dem bumba

clot police lookin at everybody and everything.

- Even white boy like you.

- I'm always careful, you know that.

I know.

Dat is why me like you.

- Luke!

- Yo!

It's called

Ready to Die.

# It's real

Ninety-four Rugged raw #

# Kickin' down

your goddamn door... #

I know, but tell me one thing,

we don't have any money?

# And everything you get

You gotta work hard for it #

# Honies, shake your hips

Yeah, don't stop #

# And niggas pack the clips

Keep on, b*tch #

# Verse two

Comin' with that Olde E brew #

# Meth-tical puttin' niggas

back in ICU #

# I'm lifted, troop

You can bring your wack-ass crew #

# I got connections

I'll get that ass stuck like glue #

# No question

I be comin' down and sh*t #

# Yo I gets rugged

as a motherfuckin' carpet get #

# And niggas love it Not in the

physical form but in the mental #

# I spark

and they cells get warm #

# I'm not a gentle man

I'm a method man #

# Baby, accept it

Utmost respect it #

# Assume the position #

# Stop, look and listen #

# I spit on your grave

then I grab my Charles Dickens #

Dr. Squires, can you, like,

prescribe medicine and sh*t?

Of course.

Why do you ask, Luke?

- Well, it's for me.

- No sh*t.

I think recently

I've been depressed.

I don't sleep good.

I think too much.

Luke, you ever hear

the saying,

"The unexamined life

is not worth living?"

Yeah. Maybe the

examined one isn't either.

Oh, no, come on,

don't talk like that.

Has this got something to do

with Kurt Cobain?

Look, the point is,

who says it's gotta be all

so f***ing sad like that, you know?

Is there something

going on at home, Luke?

Yeah, of course something's

going on at home. What?

This is what

you get paid for?

Men do the things they need to do

to become the men they want to be.

- Do you understand?

- Sure.

That includes

asking for help.

- It's my parents.

- There you go.

What about them?

They just...

They act like kids,

you know?

My wife and I

are the same way.

We act like kids

all the time.

And why do you think

that is?

Life

has a

funny way of turning you

into the one thing you don't wanna be.

My life sucks.

- I swear, it sucks.

- Lucas.

Do you have any idea

what I would give to be you again?

Not you, specifically, but me at your age?

It doesn't get any better.

- Tell me that's not true.

- Oh, you're f***ing living, Luke.

It's great, living. Get your heart broken.

Find yourself face down in the gutter.

Get your pulse up.

Make a real mess of your life, son.

This is what you tell

all your patients?

You're not

depressed, Luke.

- You're sad. There's a difference.

- No, I'm depressed.

I'm mad depressed, yo.

So just give me some of those happy pills

and we can call it a day.

Sorry, Luke.

I can't do that.

And how do you

suggest I deal, then?

I suggest you talk about it

with a friend.

- Like I said, I don't have any friends.

- You have me.

Great.

Yo, Shapiro.

- Yo.

- What's up, man?

Steph, what up?

Who's this?

This is Jesus Christ.

From my stepdad's first marriage.

Bet I can guess

what you're doing here.

Yeah, your stepdad

paged me.

Dude smokes more weed

than I do, it's pathetic.

- You like him?

- Squires?

Not really.

But you should hear about

some of the crazy people

that come into

that guy's office.

- He tells you about that sh*t?

- Yeah.

But, I mean he's not, like

supposed to tell you, right?

There's confidentiality

and what not?

Whatever. I don't know.

He tells me anyway.

Like there's this one guy he sees,

I'm not kidding, a chronic masturbator.

- Uh...

- Yeah.

- That's crazy.

- The guy jerks off seven times a day.

Literally.

And when his nuts are dry,

he just lies in bed

with his hands down his pants,

like, touching himself

and sh*t.

- Jesus Christ, no.

- Oh, it's all right. It's all good.

- Sorry.

- Don't trip.

- Is this yours?

- Uh...

Yeah.

- This is my summer job.

- You sell ices?

No, that's my cover.

For my parents.

Check me out.

Sh*t! That's a lot

of green, man.

- That's how I roll.

- So, you just... How does it work?

Well, I mean...

Can I show you?

Sure. Let me drop

the dog off.

- All right.

- All right. Hang on.

# "Summertime"

by DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince #

I'm not going to get

arrested, am I?

Just act calm

and follow my lead,

and everything

will be fine.

Relax.

Here.

# Summertime #

# Here it is, the groove

Slightly transformed #

# Just a bit of a break

from the norm #

- Luke.

- Yo. That's her.

Hi, Luke.

This is Albert.

We just ate

mushrooms.

- So, how much do you all need again?

- We met at a Phish show.

And we saw each other

and it was like that episode of 90210,

when Brandon and Emily Valentine

take ecstasy.

- Euphoria.

- What?

It's called euphoria.

Euphoria.

Euphoria.

Euphoria.

- Did you do something with your hair?

- No.

You look cuter. You look like

Jason Priestley like that.

Yo. There's like

mad cops around, I think.

So, can we do this?

# Time to sit back and unwind #

# School is out

and it's a sort of a buzz #

# But back then

I didn't really know what it was #

Who? Who's the girl?

Is she a cop?

No, this is my friend

Stephanie.

- Stephanie, this is Elanor.

- Hi. Nice to meet you.

Hi.

Come on in.

She's hot.

I'm sorry about the cop stuff.

I just...

You know, with Giuliani and the stories

you hear, you can't be too careful.

So I had to do this

today, though,

because I have this guy

coming into town tomorrow

and we don't have anything

to talk about unless we're stoned.

But if we're stoned,

in bed he's like...

He's a really nice guy.

Luke, can I ask you something?

Just for a sec.

Why are men

so complicated?

Is it because

I'm intimidating?

Am I intimidating because

I play an instrument?

No.

- You play an instrument?

- No, I know.

I forgot you don't know

anything about me.

I mean, I don't really need to know

anything about you, Elanor.

I played in a band in the '80s.

Well, in '82 we were really big.

What about you?

Stephanie? Right?

You must have some insight

into the mind of men.

I mean, he must

be a handful.

- Oh, we're not that.

- We're not like that.

I think you're really beautiful

and you have really good chemistry.

Don't you think you should try it once

and just see how it feels?

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