The West Point Story Page #5

Well, that wasn't only a brush.

He threw in the comb and mirror.

I like that kid. I like them both.

I heard you.

I saw that huddle you were in with Hal.

- Yes.

- He's going to drag me.

By what?

He's taking me to the hop.

I'm gonna be his little old drag.

- And where do you suppose I'll be?

- Plebes aren't allowed to attend hops.

And you're just a little old plebe.

Little old plebe just got an idea

Little old plebe just got an idea

Little old plebe just got an idea

Come in.

Well, Mr. Dumbsquat,

what do you want?

- Cadet Bixby reporting to ask a question.

- Proceed, Mr. Bixby.

Well, sir, I was just wondering...

...if you were dragging anyone

to the hop Saturday night.

Why? You got any ideas?

Ever hear of Jan Wilson?

The movie star?

- Why, sure, who hasn't?

- Friend of mine.

That's the kind of friendship

I'd like to make.

At ease, Mr. Bixby.

Well, sir, you see, I kind of

helped her up the golden ladder.

She's in New York.

I might be able to coax her up here.

As my drag?

I could try.

And you might persuade her

to play the princess in the show.

Wouldn't you rather make love to her

than Bully Boy Gilbert?

Start persuading, Mr. Bixby.

I didn't sleep again last night

And I'd like to discuss the matter

The nerves to which I'm strung are tight

And I'm as beat as a bowl of batter

If old man Rip Van Winkle

Thought his long sleep was a curse

I know how the old man felt

Because I've got his problem in reverse

Ten thousand

Four hundred and thirty-two sheep

How long can I toss like this?

Ten thousand

Four hundred and thirty-three sheep

What did you put in that kiss?

I've tried all the remedies

The well-known good advice

Took a hot tub and an alcohol rub

Did the alphabet backwards twice

Ten thousand

Four hundred and thirty-four sheep

We'd better get married soon

Ten thousand

Four hundred and thirty-five sheep

I'll never hold out till June

How much do I love you?

Just in case you didn't know

You get a mental kiss

With every sheep I count

And I've still got a million sheep to go

- Did you ever try seeing a doctor?

- A doctor?

I went to see a noted doctor

Who's a famous analyst

And he led me to the couch

And he gently took my wrist

I paid him $50

- Well, that sounds pretty cheap.

- Cheap? I should have paid him nothing.

'Cause I still can't sleep

Ten thousand four hundred

And 36 sheep

And one sheep that got away

He took it on the lamb.

- Ten thousand four hundred

- And 38 sheep

Won't night ever turn to day?

Oh, what a fool I am

How much do I love you?

Just in case you didn't know

You get a mental kiss

With every sheep I count

Add them all together

That's a large amount

- 'Cause I've counted a trillion sheep

- How many?

- I've counted a billion sheep

- How many?

Well, at least a million sheep, I know

How the numbers grow

And I got about a million more to go

Ten thousand, 9000

Eight thousand

Seven thousand

Six thousand, 5000

Four thousand, 3000

Sheep.

Hey, Steve,

will you get the door, please?

- Thanks, boy.

- Bix!

- Well...

- Of all people...

- Hello.

- I'm so glad to see you.

What's this uniform?

- Are you the doorman here?

- Lower than that.

Superintendent's dog, commandant's cat,

hellcats and all the admirals.

- What?

- All right, boys, everybody out.

Walk, don't run to the nearest exit.

Women and children first.

I'm rehearsing for a record date tonight.

All these men are from the press.

Leave your names.

Anything comes up, we will call you.

Wait, I'm handling things here.

I'm the press agent.

Your secret is safe.

Now, join the others like a good boy.

- But wait a minute...

- Yes, all right, fine.

I'll do the same for you sometime.

Jan Wilson, Jan Wilson.

Hollywood hasn't done a thing,

not a thing...

...to tarnish that unspoiled loveliness.

Oh, that haircut.

This you'll have to sit down for.

Sweetheart, you're in for a shock.

- What?

- Yup. I...

- Oh, no.

- Oh, yes, yes.

I'm a West Point cadet.

- You're a what?

- Yeah.

If things are bad,

I'd better unload my government bonds.

I had to get in the act.

I'm putting a show on for them.

The place will never be the same,

old boy.

I had to bring you the news.

I took a poll up there to find out

who's the top favorite...

...of the movie stars

among all the cadets.

All 2500 of them.

And who do you think they picked?

Who?

- You, Jan Wilson.

- Really? Oh, isn't that nice?

- Vindicated my judgment.

- What's your angle?

- What's your angle?

- Angle?

You've always got one. What is it?

Oh, now, Jannie.

All right, all right.

I do need a favor.

They're giving a hop for the cast

next Saturday night.

All great kids, great kids.

- And I made them a promise.

- What?

- I promised you'd appear.

- I've got two recording dates...

...three personal appearances,

radio broadcasts, interviews.

- I can't do it.

- Can't do it, huh?

Well, I can't find the time to do it.

All right.

All right.

- But, Bix...

- Oh, it's all right, it's all right.

Just don't worry about a thing.

Bix, I'm sorry.

Oh, I said it was all right.

All right. I gave it the old college try.

But just think of me

when you're counting your money.

But I said I was sorry.

Oh, well.

Look, sweet, I thought

you might as well have these.

The dancing shoes you wore

the day I took you out of the chorus.

You didn't tell me you saved these.

Oh, well, how many stars

can a guy make in a lifetime?

But you can't blame a fella

for being sentimental.

I went without lunch

a whole month to buy them.

Then you didn't know

what to do with them.

Remember that first time step

I showed you?

- Air taps.

- Oh, don't tell me I looked like that.

That was on your good day.

Now, here was one you never could do:

Move over, old boy, watch this:

- Oh, now, look, sweetie.

- What?

Life isn't all taking. There comes a time

when you gotta do a little giving.

It isn't as though

we were absolute strangers.

You just can't let old friendships

go unheeded.

And, pal, I do need a favor.

All right, I'll do it.

There's my girl, my girl.

Knew all the time

you wouldn't let old Bix down.

Knew it all the time.

My studio's gonna blow a fuse.

It'll be more fun

than making a living anyway.

Why, you phony, no-good,

two-timing character.

- Oh, Bix, it's just like old times.

- Oh, no. Your aim is better.

I can't believe it.

Somewhere along the line,

I must have been a very good boy.

Now that I'm here,

couldn't we dance together?

Someone may walk between us,

you know.

- Buttons, they're guided missiles.

- I see what you mean.

Changing the guard, sir.

Every time I see you in that uniform,

I break up.

Cute, don't you think?

What cooks?

You didn't bring me up here

just for laughs.

Step into my office.

Now, look, sweet.

That cadet

you were just dancing with, Tom?

- That is Harry Eberhart's nephew.

- He is?

Now, I'm gonna bust that kid

out of this joint.

But when I do, he's not gonna sign

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes