The Wizards Return: Alex vs. Alex Page #3

The reunion isn't for month, huh?

Oh, who cares? Let's eat.

- Benvenuto!

- Max.

I'm sorry. I just love meeting people.

Hi, Max Russo.

We have been looking all over for you.

This is our son, Max. I'm sorry.

He saw a pretty girl through the Wizard

Speed Pass and came to find her.

You have a Wizard Speed Pass?

Oh-ho-ho-ho.

Only the most powerful

wizards can create those.

Ah, but your Family Wizard, Alex Russo.

Yes. Alex is very powerful, and very...

Irresponsible!

Just because you say it loud and weird

doesn't make it Italian, Jerry.

There's that girl. I have to meet her.

She might be the future Mrs. Max Russo.

Mrs. Russo! Mrs. Russo!

Your son likes Francesca?

What's so funny?

Francesca is his cousin!

Ewe.

Theresa, did Geraldo tell you that we were

wizards in training at the same time?

We had so much fun.

Geraldo, remember I used to tickle you?

Stop, stop! Get the bread stick.

Get the bread stick.

No. No, oh no.

So, what do you think about

taking accordion lessons with me?

Well, why wouldn't I?

You're my best friend.

It's like a dream come true.

Ok. I'm ready!

- What do you think?

- I think it's missing something.

- Come here.

- Oh.

- Oh, this is the best day of my life.

- Oh, I'm so happy you're happy.

Thank you, Alex. You're such a good friend.

- Now, take it off.

- What, why?

Because even though I love that you finally

appreciate something I like to do,

it's just not you and,

I don't need it to be.

Thank you.

Besides, I can pull off a clambake outfit.

On you, it just looks stupid.

What was that?

Oh! Something I think is going

to take up the rest of the day.

Harper, grab the fishing net.

We might need it to catch me.

Yup. I broke out.

Ok, where would a Bad Alex go?

Usually, only as far as the

couch, but that door is open.

Oh, gosh.

What are you doing?

You know, I really should have

made a shawl out of this net.

Carmela, this cheese is amazing.

Oh yeah, Papa Fabrizio makes it.

Eh.

We need find me before

I do something bad...

Hi, Mom and dad. Guess what? I've changed.

Yeah, into a third grade art project.

No, no, no. Not that, dad. Guess what?

All the part of me that has all

of those bad things is gone.

Yup. Gone. Nowhere to be seen.

Unless of course you've seen it.

Mom, dad, from now on I promise...

To be the unselfish grown-up

you expect me to be.

I don't believe her.

Me neither.

Seriously, why are you

wearing a clambake outfit?

Because my best friend asked me to.

Dad, sometimes you need to do

things to make others happy.

Now, I definitely don't believe her.

Look, I still don't like

the way we got here...

But they're feeding us. So you

might as well meet the family.

Everyone, I'd like you to meet our friend

Harper, and our Family Wizard, Alex!

Oh.

So cute.

Pooka-pooka-pooka!

Just like your father!

- Why is she tickling me?

- Pooka-pooka-pooka!

Excuse me, I'm looking for a girl that's

about this tall and this beautiful...

Hey it's you.

You know my name?

Or, wait, does it just take that

long to say my name in Italian?

I don't understand what

you're saying right now.

I'll try the language of love with you.

Ok, maybe you don't speak that language.

Oh, Max. I'll save you.

Not really.

Thanks, Alex. They kiss really weird here.

All right. I'm safe in a bracelet. Thanks.

Safe or trapped?

By that evil chuckle, I'm

going to go with "trapped".

And this is where we press the

finest grapes in all of Tuscany.

Oh, that looks like hard work.

Please. Stomping your feet isn't hard work.

Yeah, filling bread rolls

with cold cuts all day.

That's hard work.

Geraldo...

Why don't you try it?

- Oh, no. No, thanks.

- Ah...

- Pooka-pooka-pooka!

- Ha-ha-ha! Ok. Ok.

- You too, Theresa.

- Oh, no, no, no. I'm ok.

- Get in.

- No, no, no.

- Theresa, get in.

- No thank you.

Get in!

Si, senora.

It's nice to appreciate my Mom and

dad doing something together.

Old me would've just been thinking

of ways to make fun of them.

- Oh.

- Oh.

- Oh, it's so squishy.

- Oh.

Ugh. And the worst part

is, I kind of like it.

Thanks a lot, Jerry. You know

what this reminds me of?

The time the bathtub backed up and you

made us take showers in there anyway.

Don't blame me. You were the one who

said, "oh, handsome vineyard guy"...

"You're so strong, the way

you squash those grapes".

I never said that.

- Oh, yes, you did.

- Oh, please.

- You imagined it.

- Oh. Oh, really?

Your insecurities imagined it.

Aha!

Ooh.

Hey, you know, they should

really have machines for this.

- Don't you think?

- Oh!

You know what? Yes, I do.

I would never disrespect you like that!

- Oh, honey, wait.

- What?

You love me so much you got so jealous?

- Oh, honey...

- Good!

Aw. They found a way to make it worse

for themselves without my help.

Changing me was great.

My cousins! Where did they go?

Oh, no. Harper, do you think my bad side

could've done something

terrible to my parents?

Hmm, let's see. All of your bad

is concentrated into one you.

- Do you want to finish where that's going?

- I get it, I did it.

Where are we?

Dad. You're not going to like this.

Oh, it's just Alex. Thank you

for cleaning me up, Mija.

Now, get me out of here. It's stuffy.

What's your hurry? Handsome

vineyard guy waiting for you?

What are you talking about?

You're the one who had to prove what a big

macho man you were with your cold cuts.

Yeah-ha! They're delicious!

Hey, hey, hey, hey. I can't

concentrate on the evil

plan we have going here if you

two are flappin' your yappers.

Evil plan?

You remember when I said, "you're

not going to like this?"

This is what I was talking about.

Who's "we?"

Excellent, Alex.

Hello, Russo's.

Hey, it's that guy. Hey, did you ever

remember that message from Justin?

Just as I thought.

Alex! You don't have to do this.

So, what's next?

How would my partner like a little

road trip to the Tower of Pisa?

Dominic is evil?

Is it weird he's even more attractive now?

- Harper. He took my family.

- Oh yeah, right. I won't date him.

Even as a young wizard I knew

that some day my dreams...

Though disturbing, would come true.

And so, from this high vantage point, we

will launch the final steps to my plan

to rid the world of mortals and then...

You know, it's really kind

of killer on the calves.

That's a nice story, can we

get to what this thing does?

Right. This device...

Replicates spells.

Once energized with

sufficient wizard power,

it will cast a spell

repeatedly across Earth.

I call it the "Dominic One Thousand".

Is that too self-centered?

You're asking the wrong girl.

I designed the Dominic One

Thousand to imprison every mortal,

thereby paving the way for a new

Wizard World that I will rule.

- Uh, that last part again?

- That we will rule.

All that is needed is a spell cast by our

generation's most powerful wizard...

Alex Russo.

All right. Well, then let me at it.

No offense, you're just a knock-off.

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