The Zen Diaries of Garry Shandling Page #2

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- I'm slated.

- Slated all around.

Larry:

You guys should know

we have

three video cameras

and we have

four film cameras

and we have actually

- two slide projectors.

- ( laughter )

It's a very

complicated show.

I'm not kidding.

But Jesus,

did you see the way Hank

was all over Hefner?

Shandling:

Some people

mistakenly think

that's a dark show

about people trying

to get what they want.

How in God's name

can they not nominate

this man for an Emmy?

Shandling:

No, it is a show about

people trying to get love

and that sh*t

gets in the way.

It hurts, Hank.

- It really hurts.

- Shh shh shh.

Shandling:

We were there on that stage

in a really

kind of experimental lab

kind of way.

We didn't have

the name on the door

of the big studio

and all that.

And it was about

exploring feeling.

Hey, you wanted

to see me?

Artie:

Yes.

Brian has filed

a lawsuit against

"The Larry Sanders Show"

for sexual harassment.

You've got top billing.

Plus you stole

my gay dog joke.

- What is that about?

- Holy sh*t!

This is crazy!

Goddamn you!

Didn't I tell you

to shut the f*** up?

Didn't you see

what he was wearing?

This is entrapment!

You know, if this

gets out all anyone

is going to remember

about the show

is this lawsuit bullshit.

Oh, and 10 years

of laughter.

Marker.

Hey, I saw that tape

of Hank, man.

That guy's got quite

a hog on him, huh?

Guy's cock is huge.

You know, I feel

kind of inadequate,

you know?

I mean, what with

his huge cock

- and all there.

- You look really good, Hank.

Very centered.

Life must be good, huh?

I'm drunk.

Actually,

my life is sh*t.

Well, it can't be

that bad.

I mean,

I... I just heard

that you were coming out

with some kind of a tape--

an exercise tape.

- Congratulations.

- What is that, a joke?

What, are you

trying to be funny?

You know, you can't

just bang a jukebox

and go,

( elongating ) "Hey!"

And all your problems

disappear, Fonzie.

- It worked for me.

- Ah, go f*** yourself.

- ( audience cheering )

- Female reporter: Each week

viewers go

behind the scenes

of the fictional talk show

"The Larry Sanders Show."

A show where

art imitates life,

and life imitates art.

People who have worked

on talk shows

will go, "Wow, that's

exactly what it's like,"

and the average person

who's never been backstage

of a talk show

will go, "I wonder

if that's really what

it's like?"

We're doing an episode

where Larry's negotiating

his contract--

'cause his contract is up,

and what will he do

and where will he go,

so I think we're gonna play

with that a little bit.

Female reporter:

The character Darlene,

played by actress

Linda Doucett--

Shandling's

real-life steady--

poses for "Playboy"

on the show

and Doucett does it

in real life.

Sacha Baron Cohen:

So, in England

"Seinfeld" was on BBC One--

the mainstream channel.

- Hank?

- Jer.

Cohen:

"Sanders" was on BBC Two

and it was kind of

a smaller niche audience.

But my friends

completely adored that show,

and that was the perfect show.

Good morning, ladies.

Cohen:
I'm not sure Ricky

Gervais would agree with this,

but I think "The Office"

is definitely influenced by it.

- Can I talk to you a second?

- Yeah.

Cohen:

It is an office.

It just happens to be

the back office

of a TV show.

Where are your pants?

I flushed them

down the toilet

with the rest

of tonight's show.

Al Jean:

That was the dawn

of what they call

"The Golden Age of TV."

"Larry Sanders"

was the first one I remember

having that

sort of reputation.

Hey, look at Larry

the big, fat a**hole.

- Whoo!

- ( applause )

Judd Apatow:

I know that the head

of HBO said that

"Larry Sanders" showed them

what they should be.

He said that

that's what defined HBO.

"Oh, we should go after

this type of quality

and content."

Are you going to keep

hammering me about

this lesbian stuff?

I think this is going great.

I think this is very funny.

- I don't.

- I do.

Hey, look,

I'm just doing my job.

- It's funny.

- You're just doing your job.

You know,

I understand if this

was coming from Letterman.

I didn't sleep with him.

( stuttering )

Am I the only host

you've slept with?

Apatow:

What do you think

the show got right?

I could tell you

what it got wrong,

which always bugged me,

was how many writers

were there?

Yeah, they only

showed a few.

There were

in other rooms

you didn't see.

Other rooms, but you

really got the impression

that, OK,

he's on every night,

and there's two writers

that I see.

They never seem

to be working.

That used to piss me off,

'cause I would say

like, "No, no, you have

a gun in your mouth

from the time you

walk in the front door

until the time

the show is over."

But, of course,

what it got right

was the ego...

I am not watching

my show right now.

O'Brien:

...how neurotic it is,

his depiction

of the desperation

to get away from it,

but also the love of it.

You know,

this is the greatest gig

in the world.

I gotta get the f***

out of here.

- Artie?

- O'Brien:
That is all...

- You've got my tape.

- ...right on.

- What tape?

- The Dana Carvey tape.

The impression

he did of me

on "Saturday Night

Live," and I haven't

seen it.

Apatow:

I remember that Dana Carvey

did this

really mean impression

of Garry

on "Saturday Night Live."

...Madonna be nominated

for "Best Virgin."

Why is he whining

like that?

I mean, I don't whine

like that.

No, not like that.

Apatow:

And then he wrote

an episode about Larry

being offended

by the impression.

- Yeah.

- ( chuckles )

So I guess

you're gonna do it, huh?

- Well, yeah.

- Well, good.

Well, now that you've...

kind of seen it,

does it

bother you, honestly?

Same disguise I think

Michael Jackson wears

when he goes

to Disneyland, isn't it?

It's a bit

over the top, yes.

But that's how

I do these things.

I mean, you know,

my hope is that

it's so abstract,

so cartoony,

that it wouldn't be

offensive to you,

you know.

I mean, like,

well, George Bush

is just like,

( impersonating

George H.W. Bush ).

You know, I mean,

and if you've seen me

do Jay Leno,

it becomes

( impersonating

Jay Leno ).

And you are just

( impersonating Larry ).

So, that's my hope.

I mean,

so you're all right?

Is it all right?

( laughs )

It bothers you.

I mean, you watch

an old "Tonight Show,"

what is that really?

Maybe it's funny to see

Drew Barrymore

when she's 84 years old,

and here she is talking

to Jay Leno when she's six,

or whatever it might be.

Hello, Larry,

it's Drew Barrymore.

Leno:

But I think

"The Larry Sanders Show"

will outlast all of us,

and the stories

are really timeless.

It's about

vanity and pride

and all those great sort of

Shakespearean things, so.

I think

he paid a price

to be able to go

that deep to make

that show.

Yeah, because it did

seem painful to him, you know?

I mean,

he was willing to endure

all sorts of pain

to get

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