The Zen Diaries of Garry Shandling Page #3

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the finished product

as good as it was.

- Slate. Mark.

- Shandling:
Excellent.

But I'll do this

to the camera.

( chatter )

- You can tell it's a script?

- Man:
Yes.

Go. Ready.

- So what's your problem? Huh?

- ( mumbles )

- Brando puts scripts...

- Both:
Up his ass.

- Right.

- Hey!

- Hey!

- Man:
Yes, everything's

- ready to go.

- Man #2:
Okay, ready, guys?

Apatow:

It does feel like

it was the metaphor

for everything Garry

was struggling with.

His ego and vanity

and narcissism,

and it's like

he took everything

that he didn't

want to be in himself

and put it

in this character

and then mocked it

and said,

"Isn't this

a terrible way to live?"

( chuckles )

Well, that's true.

I mean, when I think

about him,

I think obviously about

here's a very talented man

and a very spiritual man,

and a man who's constantly

sort of questioning

why are we here,

why are we doing things,

and how do we treat each other

and all that.

And the most neurotic,

self-absorbed person.

I'm a f***in'

talk show host, okay?

Peter Tolan:

You know, obviously,

since we always

would say "Glarry"...

- I'm all f***ed up.

- Tolan:
..."Glarry"

was the character

because it's Garry.

The idea that

he's examining himself

through that character,

it's a brilliant form

of therapy.

I can't imagine that

the success of your show,

which is huge,

has changed you

that much.

Do you feel like

you're about the same

amount happy

as you were before

all this

"Larry Sanders" stuff?

I would say literally

I'm about the same amount

happy as I was always.

It's a struggle for me.

I have very

depressing times

and yet people think

because you're famous

that you would feel--

and I don't consider myself--

if some said,

"How does it feel

to be famous?"

I mean, you know,

I don't want

to break this to you,

but we're on cable.

- So it's not like...

- ( laughter )

- You know. It's not like...

- ( applause )

- ...Seriously.

- I...

It's, like,

people go, "Wow,

can you go out?"

I go, "Well, no,

but not because of that.

- Miller:
Right.

- So...

- I don't go...

- ( laughter )

You know, I am just

a f***in' comic.

Larry:

This is about me.

This is about my life.

I've never seen it

all laid out like this,

for God's sakes.

It's not interesting.

It's f***ing pathetic.

It's about nothing

but f***ing greed

and lust

and self-loathing

and anger,

and let me

tell you something!

That is not what I'm like!

( music playing )

Apatow:

One of the difficulties

with the show,

Garry had

different showrunners

almost every season.

People would get fired.

People would quit.

So you had to reinvent

the wheel every year.

Try to figure out

what the strengths were

of these writers

and partners,

and it exhausted him.

Maya Forbes:

Yeah, and I think

there was a sense

that once

you got to the top

and you're running

the show,

it was gonna be hard

to please Garry

and that

at a certain point

it was gonna turn.

I think Garry really

felt like he had to protect

the coherence of what

he was trying to do,

and so when

he got those kinds of jokes

that were just

totally off base,

they were,

like, offensive to him.

You know, it was like,

"You're gonna destroy

what I'm doing here."

He was like, "You don't get it.

You don't get it, you know?

You don't get it, so yeah,

you don't get me.

If you--

if you don't get it

then you don't get me,

and what are you doing here?"

( music playing )

Apatow:

I was working

on "The Ben Stiller Show,"

and Garry did a cameo.

- How you doing?

- Apatow:
And then when

the show ended--

when we were canceled,

Garry said,

"Oh, you should come over

and work at

"The Larry Sanders Show."

And he said,

"And you're gonna learn

a lot," which

I always thought

was great because

he didn't say,

"You're gonna be

very helpful."

( laughter )

So when did you come over?

Which season?

Apatow:

Season two,

and I would do

two days a week

'cause I didn't want

to be responsible

for final choices.

I just wanted

to pitch jokes...

- Right.

- ...so that I was

- always helpful.

- Right.

You were not part

of the problem.

Apatow:

Then out of the blue,

and I never asked him,

Garry just said,

"I want you to direct

the next show."

And, to me,

it was such a giant thing

because I was afraid

to do it,

and he might have

known that--

that on some level

I was scared.

I never would ask,

and he gave me

that opportunity.

- Yeah.

- But it felt pressurized.

- I remember--

- Tolan:
It had to.

The oral history

of "Sanders"

is littered

with the names of writers

who-- that

he would mention

to you later

in sort of an offhanded way,

as sort of, you know,

sometimes as the butt of a joke

or just a comic reference.

I mean, his disappointment

was pretty complete.

Paul Simms:
All right,

what's the date today?

It's July 14.

That means

I haven't brushed

my teeth in three months...

'cause I've been working

on this f***in' show.

Simms:

So we've been

working, uh,

for how many months now?

Well, this is table script--

Oh. So, I don't know.

But we're on show number eight.

- No.

- Simms:
Number nine.

Number nine.

Simms:

A lot of things have changed

since we last talked.

There are now people on staff

whose names I don't know.

On the writers' staff.

There's someone who's got

a producer credit

whose name I haven't

got right yet.

Simms:

What's he look like?

It's not the...

The Jew. There's a Jewish man

and an Italian man.

( both laugh )

And between the two of them,

they don't know

what the f***'s going on.

( Simms laughing )

Shandling:

It's a living hell. Look at me.

Look at me, I'm a mess.

John Markus:

For me, it was amazing

that he didn't

enjoy the show more.

And I think it's because

he suffered the quality.

- Man:
How's it going, Garry?

- I hate this f***in' show.

- How's it going tonight?

- I hate this f***in' show.

- Well, it's almost over.

- I hate this f***in' show.

- What's the problem?

- I hate the f***in' show.

I hate the f***in' show.

Dave Letterman's right.

His attitude's right.

But to have him just tell you

what a scene should be like...

and when he was done telling you

what it was like,

you had the scene.

You had the dialogue.

You had everything.

And there were moments when

he would say,

"Okay, let's just fix this."

And he'd fix an entire script

in half an hour.

And you would see, like,

Michael Jordan in the seventh

game of the championship.

He was just in flow.

- It's not funny.

- I beg your pardon?

What word do you have

trouble with?

You understand "not"?

That's comfortable for you?

- Yeah.

- And "funny?" You've heard

of that? This doesn't work.

I think socks had something

to do with that decision.

- See? Now I'm laughing.

- Well, laugh loud

so you can cover

for the rest of us.

Hey. Hey.

You like your job?

No.

Well, watch it.

He was quite strong with me.

He wasn't warm

and fuzzy with me.

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