Theodora Goes Wild Page #5

Now, you just let him

putter around tomorrow

and then he goes right on his way.

He'd better stop that infernal tooting.

If he doesn't, it'll drive me crazy.

Want some coffee, Auntie?

No, thank you.

You haven't eaten a thing.

Isn't your head any better, Aunt Mary?

Worse.

That lawn mower never made

so much noise before.

Well, I guess nobody ever pushed it

so fast before.

You have to admit

he's a very willing worker.

He ought to do something

after the breakfast he ate.

Two helpings of oatmeal, four eggs,

and a rasher of bacon, coffee.

And then he says,

"What? No waffles, Elsie?"

"Elsie" he calls me!

And I call him

too altogether downright familiar.

Any more of his sass...

Get along, little doggie, get along, get along

Get along, little doggie, get along

Get along, little doggie

Good morning, neighbors.

Good morning. Morning, ma'am.

Get along, little doggie, get along

Howdy, squire. Howdy. Howdy.

Morning, ma'am.

My, my, well, dog my cats,

that's a mighty pretty hat you got on.

Looks like an heirloom.

Get along, little doggie, get along

Turn around, little doggie

Turn around, turn around

This is the end. Half of Lynnfield's

marching by to see that lunatic.

No, Rebecca wasn't going to say a word.

-Well, I'll settle him.

-I'll go, Aunt Mary. I'll go.

I think maybe I can manage him.

Get along, get along, get along, little...

-Morning, miss.

-What do you think you're doing?

You can't stage a circus out here

in this front yard.

Well, I can't disappoint all these people

who've walked blocks

just to look me over, can l?

Well, you've given them

more now than they expected.

So unhitch that barking horse

and stop this nonsense.

I hope you've learned your lesson, Jake.

It's a disgrace to have a little fun

in Lynnfield and don't you forget it.

-Good morning, Mrs. Cobb.

-Good morning, Mrs. Cobb.

My, my, you've put on weight.

That's about enough from you,

Mr. Dewberry.

You and I are going in the back

and trim the rose bushes, understand?

Okay, lady. Giddyup, Jake.

Giddyup. Giddyup.

Keep your hands busy

and your eyes on your work.

And tell me,

how did you track me to Lynnfield?

-Homing instinct, like a pigeon.

-Tell me.

You left some papers on the floor

in your wild flight from my apartment.

-Pure accident.

-I see.

Well, now that you know everything

and you've had your little laugh,

why don't you get along?

It fascinates me.

Why don't you get away from this burg

and lead a natural life?

I'm happy right where I am.

No quaking rabbit was every happy.

And for a lovely woman with talent,

it's a sin.

Don't worry, lady, I'm going to break you

out of this jail and give you to the world.

You wouldn't be so low

as to tell my aunts and Lynnfield about me?

-No, you're going to do that yourself.

-Never.

That's the old Lynnfield spirit.

And tell me, what kind of berries are ripe

this time of year?

Blackberries. Why?

That's what you and I are

going to pick tomorrow.

Don't be silly. I can't go

skipping off to the woods with you.

It's the berries tomorrow.

What are you doing?

Who told you to take up that rose bush?

You're a gardener, are you?

Well, you're dismissed.

You've got your notice right now.

Now, Aunt Mary, you can't do that.

I told him to dig it up.

-Why?

-Well, I thought maybe...

Well, she was just saying

it ought to be transplanted.

And I was just saying as

how transplanting is very important.

You see, it's this way, Aunt Maria.

If you keep a rose bush

in one place too long,

it uses up all the nourishment

in that one little spot of ground.

And what happens? It stops growing.

Settles down to a dull existence.

And it's the same way with most people.

What they need occasionally is

new soil with new life in it.

-Hey, Jake!

-Sylvia!

Sylvia!

-Sylvia!

-Jake!

I thought you said you were a berry-picker?

And no cracks, you.

I'm just not used to bending over, that's all.

You're a wreck, Mr. Dewberry.

-You know what you need?

-No, what?

You need nourishment,

new soil, transplanting.

You're a nasty character.

Excuse me, I'm tired.

Well, what about some berries?

Well, they're right at your head. Dig in.

Drop them in my mouth.

Well, who's going to chew them for you?

Drop them way back

so they'll just slide down.

Sorry I have to trouble you to swallow.

That's all right.

-More.

-Want some more?

You ought to be ashamed of yourself

Iaughing like that,

right out loud and everything.

What would Lynnfield say?

Say, has anybody ever been

known to laugh in Lynnfield?

I think there is a case or two on record.

Well, then somebody

must have been tickling them.

You know, you're a strange, sad case, girlie.

Do you know that?

No. No, tell me, doctor.

Well, to begin with, you're really a nice gal.

Full of normal desires,

but I can tell you what's happening to them.

-What?

-They're being slowly strangled to death.

-Why, that's murder.

-No, suicide.

Everything Lynnfield doesn't

want you to feel you write about.

Love, laughter, all the things

you want to experience and can't.

Go on.

There's a happy world out yonder, girlie.

Break loose, be yourself.

Tell Lynnfield to go take a jump.

Can you imagine Aunt Mary taking a jump?

Well, it's the only way

you'll ever be a free happy soul.

Mind the old doctor. I know.

I had to go through the same thing.

Sure is tough to break away

from your family,

your background and be yourself.

They had it all fixed for me to settle down

in Papa's footsteps.

To be a banker and a statesman,

but I wanted to paint.

It was the battle of the century, but I won it.

I knew you would.

Yeah? Well, at least

I can call my soul my own. Do you?

No.

No, I don't. I really don't.

But I could with a little help

from you, doctor.

Just say the word, girlie.

What do you want me to do?

I want you to get out of Lynnfield

and stay out.

Then I'd be free and happy.

You see, Dr. Dewberry,

-my real life is right here.

-Yeah?

Caroline Adams was just an accident.

Pure accident. She won't write any more.

But, if anything should go wrong,

I'd be glad to call on you, doctor.

Your bedside manner is so charming.

I do appreciate it.

Listen, it's getting late

and I have to help with dinner.

Come on, grandpop, we've got to go.

Wipe off your face.

Come on, Jake.

-Goodbye.

-Now, wait a minute.

You may win as a berry-picker,

but wait until we go fishing

and then I'll show you a thing or two.

Wait till who goes fishing?

I thought I told you to leave.

Sure, sure, I'll leave. Now, let's see,

the best time to go fishing is

about 5:
00 in the morning.

What we catch, we'll eat for breakfast.

Listen, I'll have a hard enough time

explaining this berry-picking.

You'd have a harder time explaining

about Caroline Adams, wouldn't you?

Shall we make it 4:30?

Now, then, just relax.

You'll never catch trout

if you're too anxious.

They can tell an amateur a mile off.

Now then, casting is an art.

You want your bait to describe a wide arc

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