Think Like A Man Page #14

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- Look at that face!

Nice to see you all.

What are you doing here?

Isn't today your mom's church thing?

Yeah, it is.

So, what? Did it get canceled?

It did not. What's up with

all these damn questions, woman?

I just thought you needed to be there.

Why would I be there when I should be here,

with the number one woman in my life?

So, since you're thinking so much,

why don't you think about

putting a burger on that plate

with some pickles and some mustard?

I'm sorry,

did you just say "number one"?

Oh, so you're not believing?

Hold on one second.

Ladies and gentlemen? Excuse me?

Hi, I need everybody's attention, please?

Hey, everybody... Yeah.

Thank you.

My name is Michael Hanover,

and I want you all to know

I am madly, and I am insanely in love

with Candace Hall.

And I just want everybody

in the world to know

that she's the number one woman in my life.

Thanks, everybody.

Now back to the reunion!

Is that okay with you?

What do you want on your damn burger?

I don't give a damn, girl.

I came for you. Come here.

And so, the book ended happily for all of us.

Well, almost all of us.

Hey, girl. Haven't seen you in a while.

I know. I'm sorry, I've been swamped.

So what are you up to later today?

Actually, I have a date with James, finally.

Between his CEO and my COO,

it seems we never see each other.

What else is new?

Anyway. You got any plans for later?

Actually, the three of us are going

to Dominic's grand opening.

He found a backer for his restaurant?

No. He got a personal loan for a food truck.

It's called...

Avenue D.

It's in Pueblo Plaza.

He wants to start small, build his way up.

Good for him, you know?

Anyway, have fun tonight.

Oh, we will.

Thank you.

So, James, how was your day?

It was good. Actually, it was... It was great.

Did I mention to you that The Wall Street

Journal is doing a feature on me?

- Yes, the...

- "Wonderkid." Yeah, I know.

"The Wonderkid."

I know I'm not exactly a kid,

but I am the youngest CEO

of a Fortune 500 company.

Yes, we talked...

Now I'm focusing my sights on the Far East.

I was talking to Warren the other day.

You know Warren Buffett?

Dub-Beezy, that's my man.

He was telling me about diversification.

So, I bought a G6. Okay, all right.

The company bought a G6.

New York to Los Angeles

costs about $60,000.

They put that down every time I go.

Also talked to my man, Kobe, the other day.

He was trying to get me

to buy an NBA franchise.

I'm fine, James.

Thanks for asking.

I'm sorry, I don't understand.

I know.

I know, but I finally do.

All right, all right, all right.

All right, a little something.

Just a little sample for the ladies.

Fellas, I'll get you back later.

Come on, Dom!

Give that to the wife.

To your lady, okay, good, there you go.

All right, one more?

There you go, there you go, J.

I'll be right back. Thanks for coming.

- I'll be right back.

- This is amazing.

Next!

I'll take the Chef's Special.

Is that with chicken or...

- Hey, back of the line.

- Look, this is personal, not business.

Move your arm!

Congratulations.

Looks like a huge success.

I wasn't expecting you.

I couldn't miss your grand opening.

Live bass ceviche?

Sal, those two lasagnas are to-go.

You got it.

So, where's your CEO?

I ended that.

Dominic!

He may have all the money in the world,

and all the power,

- but he doesn't have half your potential.

- Stop!

Stop.

I don't need you to do that for me anymore.

I'm doing me, now.

All right?

Thanks for coming,

but I got a business to run.

I'm sure you can respect that, right?

- But I was...

- Next!

What's good here, man?

Do you have a low-fat Pork Special?

- Sure.

- Let's roll with it.

Dominic?

Excuse me. What are you doing?

I want you back, Dominic.

- Guys, just give me a minute, please. I know.

- We gotta finish this up.

I'm sorry.

- What are you doing?

- I want you back.

Yeah, listen, I'm not an acquisition.

You can't just decide...

- I'm asking.

- Oh, yeah? And I'm asking for some service.

You'll get your pork sausage, Porky! Beat it!

Lauren, listen, we're just too different, okay?

Yes, we are different.

But I think that's a good thing.

What you need is status. You need titles.

- I don't care about...

- No, I don't.

What I need is a man who makes me feel

like I'm special.

I don't care about his title,

and I don't care how much money you make,

I don't care what kind of car you drive.

I just need you.

Please? I'm sorry.

I think ultimately we want different things.

No.

I disagree.

I think we want the exact same thing.

What's that?

Well, first,

I would like to have my Chef's Special,

hold the pork.

Go, Dom! All right, come on, man,

that's enough kissing.

Grab her ass or something.

That's my girl!

Show me something, God!

Give me something to think about tonight.

You know I haven't had much sex.

Me and Gail ain't really doing it

like we used to.

Really, Cedric?

- Come on, now.

- Get your little ass over here, now!

Hey, Gail, I was talking...

Pull your pants up, Cedric!

I'll get the guy in the purple.

- Hi, I'm Bennett.

- Use our ball?

I'll see you on the court! Save it...

Save it for the game, though!

Listen, little man. Where's your twin?

You're gonna need somebody

on your shoulders.

That's funny. That's real funny.

Let's see if it's funny

when my balls are on your back!

- Ball's in play. Let's go.

- Oh, sh*t.

Pass the ball, man!

You gonna play some defense?

Wait, wait, wait!

Pass!

Just shoot the ball.

You better get that out of here, little man.

You all right?

Hey, no making fun.

Good shot.

- Good shot?

- It was!

- Bennett, be a man and push him!

- It was a good shot.

Pick on someone your own size, man.

Oh, my knee!

Man, you better calm down.

He put his balls on my head.

Where's my help on defense?

Get out of here!

Bennett! Jeremy!

I'm trying to get my ball back!

Can I have the ball, please?

Just let them keep it. Let them keep it.

- Thanks, you guys!

- Go get that.

Hey, we play here every Thursday.

That wasn't that bad.

Think about it.

Well, I think it was a good time.

It's all about the exercise, guys.

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