Think Like a Man Too Page #11

Hello?

- Who is this and where is Gail?

- She's preoccupied right now. So...

- Preoccupied? What...

- Yeah, it means busy.

Wait a minute, hold on.

Say "preoccupied" again.

Preoccupied.

Is this Drake?

Dude, why you picking

up Gail's phone, man?

This is... This must be Cedric.

Actually, I'll tell you one thing.

You definitely sound the way you look.

That's not meant to be

taken as a compliment either.

At the end of the day, you're light-skinned,

so if I hit you it's gonna show.

- Listen, I'll get Gail to call you back, okay?

- You won't get Gail to do anything.

- That's actually up for debate.

- You know, Drake, honey...

- I'm gonna put the phone down now.

- Put this phone down, I'm gonna...

Hello?

I'm re-thinking the

bedroom chaise lounge.

I like the way you say

chaise. Chaise lounge.

I never really noticed

how nice of a word that is.

Gail!

If you give that light-skinned nigga

some ass... Gail, I know you hear me!

Break!

This was all his idea, not mine.

He just had to have

a Vegas wedding.

I wanted to stay in LA, you know.

I can't believe we're still here.

- Just try to relax.

- Come here. Sit down.

I can't!

Between us and the guys, I'm sure

somebody's already on their way.

Ladies, elbows stay on

the table, no cheating.

Winner! Next!

- Damn, Sonia, you said you had her.

- You get her then!

My fiance is spending

her wedding day in prison.

That's my fault. You

know, I'm just bad luck.

I'm like Mister from The

Color Purple. I'm cursed.

For real.

I mean, maybe I just

want it too bad, you know?

- Dreamed too big.

- You did.

- Tried to fly too high.

- Way too high.

I let you down, man.

But understand something. I was

just trying to be the best best man.

But, you know what, Isaac, you were

right. I am not the best best man.

- I am the worst best man.

- Yeah.

Let's take it a step further.

- I'm the worst best man ever.

- Yeah.

I kind of felt like that's where

y'all were supposed to jump in and say,

- "No, Ced. It's not that bad."

- It is that bad.

We're in jail. Look at

us, man. Look at my pants.

Mike, I told you don't pick them

pants, so, don't put that on me.

This is not how it was supposed

to be. I mean, tonight was crazy...

- It was awesome.

- It was epic.

I'm supposed to be getting

married in a few hours.

All I wanted to do

was hang with my boys.

I didn't want some wild

and crazy Vegas weekend.

Michael, you gotta realize

that the night is just way...

Think about the after-party, too.

Oh, my God, fellas.

The after-party.

- I can't call and cancel that now.

- Seriously?

- Seriously, what?

- That's where you go?

- It's one note with this dude.

- What do you mean I'm one note, Zeke?

- You haven't heard one thing Michael said.

- I just lost $40,000, Zeke!

- Fail.

- What does that mean?

- You fail.

- Okay, you fail.

- You are fired.

- I don't work for you.

I just hired you and

guess what? I fired you.

Cedric, just stop,

man. We've had enough.

It's not about you,

it's about Mike.

It's been about Michael and

Candace this whole weekend.

- No one flew in town for you. Enough.

- I was about to say the same thing...

Look, it's still your big day,

and I promise you we're gonna

do everything in our power

to get you out of here and

to your wedding on time.

You're gonna marry her.

Oh, my God.

Jesus Christ!

Lord have mercy.

Good morning.

Good morning.

Wait a minute.

Hey, Mom, it's me, Michael. Listen,

I'm in the Clark County jail.

Oh, my God, we have to go.

Wake up! Wake up!

We're still in prison!

Wake up, Sonia! Wake up!

Mya! Mya, wake up!

No, this can't be happening.

Wake up! Wake up! Guys!

Bennett, wake up.

Jerm, Jerm, Jerm! Guys!

Wake up! Excuse me, sir.

Tish, wake up!

Oh, God, let me out!

Please! Oh, my God,

please! Let me out!

I'm supposed to get

married in three hours!

I'm supposed to be

in hair and makeup.

Please!

- Dom, you said you'd get us out of here.

- Yeah. We'll get out.

Well, what time is it?

Let's go, ladies.

You just made bail.

We made bail!

Oh, my God, come on! Let's go!

Thanks.

We made bail!

- We're free!

- Please don't leave me, guys!

We're free!

Oh, my God!

- Thanks for holding the door open.

- Oh, my God.

- Where's Michael?

- He's right there.

Didn't I tell you to

keep an eye on him?

There's your boy right there.

- Mom, I'm right here.

- Oh, my God! Michael.

- They hurt you?

- No, I'm fine.

- Where are your clothes?

- Thank you!

Thank you.

This is probably your fault!

Oh, my God!

Can you believe this?

Tish?

- Baby, that's not how I raised you.

- They're my friends.

Oh, God, give me strength.

- Michael.

- Baby, I'm so sorry.

Hello! We have a wedding

to get to, people! Come on!

Guys, let's go!

Sorry!

- We're almost there!

- Hurry up!

Quiet!

Where have you been? I've

been calling you all morning.

- What's going on?

- You missed your time slot.

I told you, you had

to be here on time.

Let me handle this.

Look, miss, there has to be

something you can do to help us.

Is there another location you

can offer? Anything. Please.

This is our busiest month for

weddings and everything's booked solid.

I've already checked. I'll keep

trying, but it's gonna take a miracle.

There's gotta be

something that you can do.

I'm sorry.

Sorry, man.

Not now.

You wanna do Baby Boy?

Yeah, Jody!

- You gonna clean the house?

- I'm gonna clean the house, Jody.

- You gonna make me dinner?

- I'm gonna make you fajitas, Jody.

No, it's... No, it's tacos. You make

tacos. I mean, she makes me tacos.

Who cares?

I just wanna be accurate

if we're gonna role play.

But I don't like calling you

Jody. I'm sorry. It skeeves me out.

And your fanny-pack is

digging into my groin.

- His real name is Tyrese.

- I'm gonna call you Tyrese.

- Tyrese?

- Yes.

Take off your fanny-pack,

Tyrese! It's killing me!

If there was ever a time to

chill out, now would be it.

That's a great idea.

Guess you girls really did

get your freak on last night?

Well done.

They did.

Which totally explains how

everything went sideways last night.

So sideways.

You know, Jeremy, I've been

thinking about what you said

about me being a drill sergeant.

- Babe, I'm so sorry. I was being a jerk.

- You were absolutely right.

I don't wanna force anything,

especially not a baby.

I think we should just take

the pressure off ourselves.

Absolutely.

No, I love us without the pressure,

and if a baby comes out of that,

I'm ready.

- Really?

- Yeah.

In fact, I'm ready right now.

Babe, don't you think we

should get a little sleep?

Khal Drogo no need sleep.

Khal Drogo need woman.

I just hope you're still, you

know, of optimum ovulation, 'cause

I'm feeling pretty good.

No, babe. That's not how it works.

It's like the first day of my last period

and then you gotta count a couple weeks.

And your last period was five

weeks ago at Comic-Con, right?

Five weeks? No, that

can't be right, can it?

What?

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