Ti stimo fratello

---

I remember the day

I defended my thesis.

It was late June.

Genoa was sweltering

But the board was captivated

by what I was saying.

Genoa lost again.

As always.

My whole family was there.

My dad, Michele Vernia,

marshal with the Tax Police,

born down south near Bari.

He'd been waiting for this day.

Aunt Vittoria, his sister,

who raised me like a mother.

And this...

This...

is Uncle Duilio.

A true Genoan,

a real bundle of energy

They won't make him read meters?

Does an engineer read meters?!

My thesis had

fascinated everyone.

They were

all struck by it.

What's up?

Congratulations!

It's been a long time

since we heard

such a finely argued defense.

I hereby award you a masters

in electronic engineering,

accompanied by the academic kiss.

- Please, don't bother.

- No...

I insist. You deserve it.

Regards to the Marshal.

I'd heard those words before.

That watch...

I'd seen it before too.

Put these fakes in the van

and have them destroyed.

Corporal, you can go.

I'll see to this.

We can handle it, sir.

Corporal, I gave you an order!

I said I'll see to it.

Is that clear?

The body of Christ.

Father, I never went to catechism.

That's ok, you'll do it later.

Regards to the Marshal.

Regards to the Marshal.

Vernia...

You're in a real fix.

Me?

With your degenerative

chronic asthma...

I don't have asthma!

You do. You're unit for service.

Regards to the Marshal.

Enough with the watches, Dad!

It's corruption!

Calm down, young man.

It would be if they were real

but since they're fake...

it's a polite gesture.

Auntie?

Call it added value.

Enough of your tax shoptalk, ok!

Where's your brother Jonny?

The only one missing.

Yo, bros, where's the can?

- Upstairs!

- Thanks, bro.

My brother is kind of special.

He's always been crazy about music.

We could never figure out why.

'Nth age, it's gotten worse.

- What're you drinking?

- Soda pop.

Can I have soda pop?

He was such a fan of John Travolta,

we all started calling him Jonny.

YOU'RE AWESOME, BRO!

Milan! The New York of Italy.

Where a graduate

makes his dreams come true.

Milan never sleeps.

Milan has jobs for everyone!

Thanks, but we're not hiring.

Thanks, but we're not hiring.

Ok. Goodbye.

Thanks, but you're not hiring.

Goodbye.

But, in Milan, a highly qualified

electronic engineer

always ends up with a top-notch job.

I'm the printer guy.

Follow me, I'll show you.

How do we sell this alarm clock?

Take my breath away

We have some really original ideas.

The printer guy..

That's the third one so far.

One that works would be nice.

- Yes, sir.

- Where were we?

We have some pretty original ideas,

pretty effective ones...

Here's the first

His is the first

"Wake up, guys!"

Sh*t happens...

Let's hear the other genius.

"It's time for the future!"

You think I'm dumb?

I knew it.

He knew it!

- What's so funny?

- It's nothing serious.

The papers blocked.

You don't need a technician.

Ok, genius,

since you're such hot stuff,

give us your idea.

- Me?

- Yes, you.

When he set the alarm clock,

my dad always said,

"Being first is a matter of seconds. "

Being first is a matter of seconds...

- That's beautiful!

- Really beautiful.

You guys won't even understand

in 20 years.

He's good, huh?

Really good!

Sometime later

- Hello?

- Giovanni?

Who is it?

Who do you think'? Your father!

Dad, what's up? it's 6:30 AM.

Were you sleeping?

No, I wasn't.

You're getting sloppy in Milan, son,

sleeping so late!

Listen to your dad.

I'm trying

to get your lay about brother hired.

I asked a friend,

Marshal Vincenzo Di Prima,

to get him into the Tax Police.

You remember Di Prima?

Sure, we played with his son as kids.

What's that music?

What?

You play music

while talking to your dad'?!

Anyhow, as I was saying,

Marshal Di Prima pulled strings

and got him through the written exam.

Now he has the oral.

Do I care?

You should.

Your brother's oral

is in Milan.

No, Dad.

Can't we sleep around here?

You can't do this!

I can. You only need to put him up

for a week.

But when?

Who knows? Your brothers unpredictable.

Like the IRS.

Aren't you getting the entry phone?

Enough!

- Who is it?

- Tax Police!

Come up, jerk!

He just got there!

Be nice to him

I'm wasting my breath!

Ok, Dad, I have to go.

Remember, I only want good news.

What's this racket?

There, that's settled.

Who is it?

Federica... My brother.

Hey, sister!

Number one, bro!

Who's this?

My girlfriend, Federica.

Awesome...

- Thanks.

- No, the ish pool.

- You like ish?

- Yeah, it's wild when they roar!

There my babies.

Hungry? I'll get you breakfast.

Be good now

Francesca's nuts.

Federica.

Same difference.

I'll get your food.

Ok, I need breakfast, bro.

Why didn't you warn me?

He turned up unannounced,

if you didn't notice.

You're really alike.

We're twins. Know what twins are?

Two identical people.

Yeah, but he's nice.

Got any soda pop?

'Mid pizza!

Mr. Berman, you have a great product.

As sales director,

after talking to our chairman...

Her dad.

...we've decided to give

the full campaign

to our very own

Giovanni Vernia.

Her boyfriend.

Ok, I've made fantastic pizza.

You make fantastic slogan.

Now try Crazy Pizza.

I already ate.

- Try Crazy Pizza!

- I'm ok.

Eat Crazy Pizza!

I know it's good. After lunch maybe.

- You eat.

- Eat it, Giovanni.

I'm eating.

Yes, it must be really good because...

Salami and candy a heavenly match.

We'll soon find a slogan.

They'll go crazy in Naples!

They'll be fighting over it!

Come on...

"Teliot"

Lorylipsum,

the new show from DJ TV

that uses the Net's top videos

and makes them into stories

by Matteo Curti.

Lorylipsum, every day at 8 PM

on DJ TV

Hi, bros.

What you lookin' at?

You guys still hungry? Ok, I get it.

Uncle Joni will get your chow

Not Auntie Francesca's stuff.

This is way better.

Let's see what records they have.

Dyer Straights, Boot Springstring,

Zucchero,

Roby Willyams,

Frank Sinapas...

Maybe this one...

Guanito Mirabal, sabor de Cuba...

Latin American... Disgustin'!

Get it off me!

It's Albertino. Meet me tonight

at Milan's legendary Gilez club

for a wild party!

If you're into house music, be there!

Right on, bro, thanks for the invite.

Little bros, whassup with you?

You don't dig the cereal?

Breathe, little bros, breathe.

They're not breathin'!

C'mon...

Mega-bummer!

Sparkling or still?

Slightly sparkling,

in a closed bottle unlike usual.

I was wondering...

This seafood salad, what's in it?

Seafood. Octopus, calamari, tuna...

Fresh tuna or...

Fresh from the sea.

Caught in Maratea this morning.

South of Naples?

And it's here already?

It flew straight from the driftnet.

Sorry, but Europe has banned

the use of driftnets.

Europe isn't Maratea.

They do what they want down there.

F*** them.

- Good one, Peppi.

- Thanks, Toni.

Ok, one seafood salad

that does what it wants!

Right on!

Four seafood salads, four coffees,

one slightly sparkling water...

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes