Tideland

Synopsis: Pre-teen Jeliza-Rose's parents are hopeless drug addicts. When pa, rocker Noah, finds ma's OD'd, he fears to be charged with homicide and takes Jeliza along to his ma's place, in a desolate country region. With Noah passed out, the girl mentally transfers to a fantasy world she and her doll heads enter magically. Jeliza's adventures also star the crazy locals, notably Dell, and Dell's grown but intellectually disabled brother Dickens.
Genre: Drama, Fantasy, Horror
Director(s): Terry Gilliam
Production: ThinkFilm
  1 win & 11 nominations.
 
IMDB:
6.5
Metacritic:
26
Rotten Tomatoes:
30%
R
Year:
2005
120 min
Website
588 Views


The rabbit-hole went straight on

like a tunnel for some way...

and then dipped suddenly down.

So suddenly that Alice had not a moment

to think about stopping herself...

before she found herself falling down...

what seemed to be a very deep well.

Either the well was very deep,

or she fell very slowly...

for she had plenty of time as she

went down to look about her...

and to wonder

what was gonna happen next...

You bend so that you don't break

You give but then you can't take

Those wise eyes of yours

Those big skies of yours

My sweet honey rose

Strange dark flower rose

Jeliza-Rose

One, two, three, four...

No, that...

You must be Titania.

Hi, Titania.

It's me, Jeliza-Rose.

And this is Mustique.

I'm just as excited as anything.

Cos today,

we're all going on a great trip.

Sexual ambush in the new wild west

God is a camera, baby,

show us more breast

For every name in a star

on that dirty boulevard

Ten thousand others got shot

through the heart

The Isles of the Dutchman,

it's calling

His perfume and money

is the smell of sin

Miss September gave it up

to Robin Hood

The day Vincent Van Gogh

came to Hollywood

And here's my impression of it all

What's in Denmark?

When you ever been there, anyway?

It's just something stupid

you've got in your head. Jutland.

Jutland.

Jutland. It's called Jutland.

- It's where we're headed.

- The Viking land of marsh and fjords...

and weird light.

I see dark banks...

decorated by the most beautiful flies.

Where do you get

all of these crappy ideas, anyway?

Oh, I'm just thinking of a place

without a phone.

Nobody could hound me then.

They won't find me,

or you or Jeliza-Rose.

F*** that, Noah, I ain't going.

- So don't even bother trying. Stupid.

- Whatever you want.

Guess me and Jeliza-Rose

will make the trip. How's that?

You know what, Noah...

you and that little sh*t-critter

can leave whenever you want.

I don't care.

When you're done with daddy

come upstairs and do my legs, okay?

Okay, mama.

Thanks, sweetheart.

Did you know...

that King Harold...

he promised to marry

the Norse Queen, Gunhilda...

and enticed her to Jutland.

Then on her arrival she got drowned

in a bog instead.

Not very nice, is it?

No, not very nice.

No. Think she deserved it?

No.

I guess she didn't.

Thank you, sweetie.

Yeah...

time for...

for daddy to...

go on a little vacation.

I say poor me.

Danish folk greet the May sunrise.

Daddy...

is Jutland like the Prairies?

It's your daddy's fault

you're the way you are, not mine.

Because I loved you.

Lip-smacking little junkie baby.

Irritable and hyperactive, you was.

Just twitching and spasms

and convulsions.

Your daddy blew smoke in your face

to keep you quiet, you know that?

I think it would damage you,

but don't blame me...

I breast-fed you forever.

Jeliza-Rose, you know I love you,

don't you?

I'm sorry, baby.

I'm gonna do something real nice

for you real soon some day, I promise.

- Sure, mama.

- Baby...

and I want you...

What the f*** are you doing?

How many times have I told you to stay

away from my chocolate, you little b*tch?

Oh, honey.

I don't want you to leave me,

Jeliza-Rose.

I can't get by without you, Jeliza-Rose.

Down, down, down.

Would the fall never come to an end?

"I wonder how many miles I've fallen

by this time?"

Alice said aloud.

"I must be getting somewhere near

the centre of the earth."

Jeliza-Rose, wake up.

Wake up. Listen.

You should know this before I forget.

The bog waters...

they have weird powers.

They leave these bodies...

in bogs for thousands of years

and they don't decay. They just...

Well, they may get a little shrunk

and stuff. Honey, listen to me now.

Come here, try to understand this.

Lookee here.

There he is, look, see him...

that man was murdered

two thousand years ago.

You're looking at somebody

deader than dirt.

Who killed him?

Well, I don't know.

Let's just hope we're in that kind of

shape in two thousand years.

Look at him.

He's just...

he's just lying there...

waiting to come back to life.

Okay. That's what I wanted to tell you.

Goodnight, baby.

Straight to sleep now,

or else your mum...

and all the bog men in the world

will come chasing after you.

- Dad!

- What?

Daddy...

could you leave the light on tonight,

please?

Sure, baby. You got it.

It was the methadone that killed her.

Should have kept her on the junk.

I should have just cut her dose

and kept her on it.

Now she's dead and...

I don't have a car.

Please don't be sad.

Now we can eat all her choc bars.

Look... here they are.

No, no one's gonna take you from me,

sweetie.

That's not happening here. Huh?

Now, we're leaving.

Okay? We're gonna go off

to the prairies.

- Okay?

- We can go to Jutland.

Wouldn't that be wonderful.

All right, is there anything

you wanna say?

- Mum's dead all right.

- Maybe we should...

give Queen Gunhilda

a real send-off...

will all the things she loved, yeah.

There'd be horses on there and...

- Yeah.

- Some of these.

- Plates of gold. Come on, honey.

- These too.

Okay. Yeah, that's it.

What else did she love on there?

- Shoes.

- Oh yeah, she loved shoes, that's it.

That's it. Lay her to rest on a...

a Viking ship.

Yeah... set her on fire.

Adrift the great misty fjords at dawn.

No, no, sweetie, sweetie!

- Maybe it's a bad idea.

- Come on now.

You might burn up the whole building

and everyone else.

Yeah, you're right.

Let's go.

Don't stare, it's bad luck.

Come on.

Not it. No, no, come on.

Let's do this damn thing.

Gotta monitor the information

as it develops.

The bog men... they'll be looking for me

when they find mum.

Probably already found her.

I'm not gonna be safe until we get to

Grandma's house.

Think mum will keep falling

until she falls right through the earth?

Got to get rid of the squirrels in the attic

because they're chewing the wiring.

They make a terrible racket

in the morning.

One bit me once.

Me and my cousin,

we beat it dead with a bat.

But not before that sucker tried

climbing my pant leg...

all crazy mad, getting itself

tangled in my hair.

Sinking it's big yellow teeth

into my scalp...

tearing at everything.

Nothing. Nothing.

Well, Noah isn't even worth

a headline any more.

Yeah, I'm a nobody.

Shall I read some more?

Yeah, sweetie,

that would be nice. Read.

"Well!" Thought Alice to herself.

Your grandma, she liked the squirrels.

She said the place didn't feel

so lonesome that way.

Jeez.

Oh, mama,

where are you when I need you?

Wish I'd met grandma.

She was a wonderful woman,

your grandma, but...

Queen Gunhilda said

"F*** that. F*** that." she said.

Really!

I wanted to take you, all right.

- We're going there now, right?

- Sure we are.

- I told you. Hey...

- We are, aren't we?

Sweetie, this is just the first stage.

You and me...

we're on our travels, honey.

We're going across the ocean to Jutland.

You and me, okay?

Jeliza-Rose. Was that you making

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Tony Grisoni

Tony Grisoni (born 28 October 1952) is a British screenwriter. He lives in London. His first feature film, Queen of Hearts, directed by Jon Amiel, won the Grand Prix at the 1990 Festival du Film de Paris. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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