Trespass Against Us Page #2

You got no idea, Chad.

No idea the troubles I've had

putting all this together.

And here you are, my eldest,

acting like the prize div.

You know what my dad

once said to me?

Yeah, I do.

What the f*** is

the matter with you, then?

I'm just trying

to look after my family, col.

What you say?

I'm your family.

You're forgetting

who you are, boy.

I swear to god, I will f***ing smash

your puny little f***ing skull

and then I will pluck

every little pubic hair

out of your bollocks

if I think you're getting

anywhere close

to being a f***ing Gorgie.

- Come here.

Give your dad a kiss.

All right, then, Tyson?

All right? Morning.

Glad you're here, me boy.

Just saying,

we got a job for you, we have.

Spell "free Bryan."

Fuh, fuh, eh...

Right, come on, you do it.

Right, there you go,

right there.

Spell it.

There we go.

That's it.

Now we're a proper crew.

You in with me and Ty,

then, Chad?

That's it.

There you are.

A little bit more.

That's it, you've got it.

Free Bryan?

Yeah.

Just the tip of the brush.

That's it.

Write "f*** gawas", Tyson.

Could've at least chored

a decent car.

First car I ever chored

was a 6r4.

No, you never.

Have that!

Let's go again.

Let's go to St. Paul's

and find Johnson.

No, man, let's keep on

at lovage.

The motherf***er needs baiting.

We've been at him all day long.

I'm gonna gel.

You lot carry on.

- Right, I'm driving.

- I'm driving.

No, I'm f***ing driving.

I'm driving. I'm driving.

- Let me drive.

- I'm driving.

How am I gonna get home?

In that.

Ah, great.

The hottest car

in Gloucestershire.

Every Gawa in town

looking for us!

F***in' hell.

- Come on, mush.

All right there, Chad?

You know where he is.

Let's see him, then.

Six minutes.

A clear winner.

Should improve, too.

A beauty.

You serious about this, then?

Needs a bit of clearing up,

but with a bit of work...

Never mind about that, Noah.

It's all right, innit?

Got potentials.

Thing is, Chad,

you and your Kelly and the kids

are welcome up here...

but we can't be having your old

man and his whole lot pitching up.

We're a settled community,

no troubles,

and I wanna keep it that way.

It's all I want too.

Somewhere near school

for Kelly and the kids.

Good.

There is one other thing, Chad.

I'm not doing this

behind your Colby's back.

I can't be on the wrong side

of your dad.

Listen, I wanna take it.

It's yours

unless I hear otherwise.

Means what I said, though.

Give me a few days

to sort my sh*t out, okay?

Cushty?

Thanks, Noah.

All right, Chad?

Nice little stunt

you pulled earlier.

Do you think I give a sh*t

about some driving misdemeanor?

That was very original, Chad.

Well done.

Was it daddy's idea?

Did daddy tell you to do it,

did he?

Don't know what you're on about.

How's Kelly?

Getting old, ain't he,

your b*tch?

All right, trousers.

Richard cutler,

you're under arrest

on suspicion

of driving a stolen car.

You do not have to say anything,

but it may harm your defense

if you do not mention,

when questioned, anything

you later rely on in court.

Anything you do say

may be given in evidence.

Could've f***ing murdered you.

What were you doing

up there anyway?

- Up where?

- You know where.

I know his poxy site.

Just having a mooch.

A mooch? Stroll on.

Gotta buy Tyson a b*tch, ain't I?

It's his birthday next week.

Hadn't even got up there. Lovage

just come out of nowhere.

Prick.

Stood no chances.

Right.

Got a job for you tonight,

all right?

F*** that.

Some fatements in this one.

Can't be doing with all that,

not tonight, mush.

Oh, well, that's tough.

It's all set for tonight.

What's the matter with you?

- What?

- You heard.

It's Sunday.

Why has it gotta be tonight?

'Cause I f***ing said so!

Can we turn

this f***in' music off?

Mama.

Mama!

And we actually

removed a bay window

and we found it under there

and I've had it ever since,

but my husband just keeps

saying it's a bit of old tat.

But I just thought, well,

I'll bring it along.

Bit of old tat.

Have you worn

this bit of old tat?

What does that say, Ty?

Ha ha, you can't read!

- Read it to him, Tyson.

- You little div.

Oi, that hurts.

Um, no, I just liked it,

and I just-

I just kept it.

Are you coming, then, or what?

- I'm coming.

- You're not going anywhere.

A Collier de chien, a dog's

collar ornament, in diamonds...

Eight grand.

Eight grand for that?

F*** off.

Eight or nine thousand pounds.

Pff.

Oh, my god.

Come on, then, Chad.

Let's gel.

Listen, Kenny, I don't know

anything what Colby's on about.

I never worked a Sunday

in my life.

Calls himself Christian.

You wants to do it,

you go and do it.

Me, I'm not into that sh*t

no more.

Just want a quiet life, me.

No troubles.

What the f*** you on about?

You can't sit 'round here

all night.

Come on, Chad.

Sort it out, mush.

What's the matter with you?

Nothing.

- Just says it.

- Might as well go.

I know you wanna go anyway.

Just f***ing go.

I'm staying here

with my family tonight.

It's our anniversary.

That's bollocks. I know

it's not your anniversary.

- It is now.

- Ty, your dad's flapping.

- What's happened to him, mush?

- F*** off, Kenny.

I know what you're doing.

Just f*** off.

Sampson says you're on strike.

You a f***ing miner now or what?

Kenny's jobbing this one, col.

He just said so.

- What the f*** are you on about?

- I never.

- Kenny's on it, col.

- Is he f***.

Tyson's got more chance

of bossing it.

What do you say, then, Ty?

Wanna go on a job?

Yeah? Bit of driving?

Yeah.

Can I have a fag

for our mum, please?

Go on, piss off.

Where's fat c*nt Norman?

- Norman!

- Leave him alone, mush.

- Where's windows?

- Choring us a motor.

- You been drinking, mush?

- I might have had a few ciders.

You're off your head,

you are, Samp.

Shut up flapping, lest.

On and on.

- He's got slippers on, Chad.

- He's got slippers on, Chad.

Ty, you little f***ing devil.

Stop being a Dinlo, Sampson.

All right,

who's gonna get the petrol?

Not me.

Right, lest, get me 40 fags

as well.

Why is it me

who's gotta get his face on TV?

'Cause you's

the most good-looking.

For f***'s sake, Chad.

Just 'cause Norman ain't here.

- Bye, lest.

- F*** off.

I swear on the mother's c*nt,

them pills Lester's on,

they're no good

for no one, mush.

Made him worser if anything.

I took one once.

Dreamt I sucked off a dog...

spunk an' all.

- What were it?

- Were anti depressives.

No, what were the dog?

Oh, it were a Labrador.

- It was a nice blonde retriever.

- You sick son of a c*nt.

You're a sick f***ing bastard,

you know that, Sampson?

All right?

- I've got keys, Chad.

- Gel, gel!

Gel, gel.

Lalled choring the petrol.

Quick, Chad, gel.

What the f*** you done that for?

I gave you the scrilla.

I told you,

I'm not getting my face on TV.

You f***ing div.

You don't think got cameras

at the pumps?

- What?

- Mongs of petrol in here now.

If we get in a chase

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