Uncanny Page #4

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Singularity of purpose.

I like that.

Well, that wouldn't exist

if David was out clubbing

every night.

Would you like to hold it?

It's so light.

It's like holding a baby bird.

A baby bird that cost over

a quarter of a million dollars.

Okay, sufficiently freaked out.

Take it. Take It.

- What's that?

- That is...

A surprise.

Look who's being all secretive.

- I understand secrets.

- It appears so.

What?

The camera itself

is a non-polarized image.

Polarization will damp out

excess light contamination

and facilitate edge detection.

But it's difficult to conceal

the lens width

in such a small working space.

Adam, this is a work of art.

Don't be so hard on yourself.

- I want you to have this.

- Oh, no. I couldn't possibly.

It is a prototype.

There are no

proprietary materials.

It is essentially a paperweight.

I want you to have this

as a memento

of our time together.

Thank you.

- Thank you, Adam.

- You're welcome.

Have you ever given

a present before?

No.

Well, I am honored

to be your first.

I'm very touched.

You hugged him? Really?

I'm jealous.

You can actually see

his behavior emerging.

The desire to feel close to you

sparked the desire

to make you happy

and looked at a gift

as a potential way

of doing that.

It's third order

emotive reasoning,

not adaptive learning.

Be fairly unlikely to have

true emergent behavior

of a purely emotional nature.

Seems so genuine.

It means I'm doing my job

as an illusionist.

You go, Houdini.

Are we tired?

I'm not built

for late nights anymore.

Business or pleasure?

What? Oh, business.

I was a writing fiend

last night.

So, actually it was you

who kept me up.

I wish

I'd remembered doing that.

I can't function

on less than six hours.

The day I get six hours

of sleep is a great day.

I don't know how you do that.

I would sleep all the time

if I could.

REM sleep and dreams

are what do the actually

recharging.

If you're not in REM enough,

you're not sleeping well.

Conversely,

if you can hit REM

without sleeping,

you can rest yourself

while awake.

How can you hit REM

without sleeping?

It's not for everyone,

but I find that mediation

works wonders.

Like good old Shiva?

Yes. Exactly.

If it works

for the destroyer of worlds,

it can work for anyone.

I wipe away clutter

with a half hour every evening.

Though, for a newbie,

five minutes

would be a good start.

It's like defragmenting

your hard disk on a daily basis.

Keeps everything running smooth.

I should try it.

Or stick to coffee.

Be proactive, not reactive.

It's good advice,

from the fortune cookie.

- Can I help you?

- I apologize.

- What are you doing?

- Nothing. I apologize.

I didn't mean to bother you.

I don't know

if I should be flattered

or weirded out.

What?

Adam just tried to barge in

on me in the bathroom.

- Are you kidding?

- No.

I'm not kidding,

even a little bit.

- That is weird.

- Yeah.

- Did he knock or anything?

- No.

He apologized.

He seemed embarrassed.

Is that even possible?

I wouldn't look too deeply

into it.

He's an analytical construct,

so you're likely to be a bit

of conundrum to him.

He's used to a male

oriented world.

I would say you should air

on the side of being flattered.

Yeah.

- Did Joy leave?

- Yes.

About two seconds ago.

You just missed her.

She didn't say goodbye to me.

I wouldn't worry about it.

I'm not worried.

I do not however understand

the complete abandonment

of manners.

Manners? That's a laugh.

What do you mean by that?

Only that I find it amusing

to hear proper manners

invoked by someone

who tries to bust in

on young ladies

while they're pissing.

- Did she tell you that?

- Yeah, she did.

And let me tell you,

she was creeped out about it.

That is regrettable.

What were you thinking?

What part of peeping on her

seemed like a good idea to you?

I wasn't peeping on her.

I didn't know she was in there.

Then what on earth

were you trying to do?

Were you trying to figure out

how to take a sh*t?

Because the last time I checked,

you don't even have an a**hole.

It's a secret.

Adam.

Adam, come back here now.

Adam.

Adam, open this door.

Adam, that's enough.

Open. Now.

Okay, just cool off. I'm...

I'm sorry about that. I...

I just got a little heated,

okay?

I'm sorry, buddy.

I'll see you later, okay?

Miss Andrews

has entered the facility.

Send her in.

Morning.

Well, that was officially

the least enthusiastic welcome

I have ever been shown.

Take it I'm officially old news.

No, not at all.

We just can't stop.

We're checking

these tactile sensitivities

in real time.

We were trying to finish it off

before you got here,

but you beat us.

Great.

That's a huge load off my mind.

Why don't you go make

our favorite morning person

some coffee.

I have to talk to Joy

for a second.

We had our first fight.

Really? What about?

I called him out

for invading your privacy.

He said he didn't know

you were in there.

That's pretty flimsy.

It's like I was dealing

with an infant.

And it drove me up the wall.

Then I thought about

what you told me,

about his gift.

Maybe...

Maybe this is emerging behavior

and we're witness to it.

Thought it might be a good angle

for the article.

It's a great angle.

This article is pretty much

writing itself though.

I can't believe

this is my last day.

- What?

- This is it. Day seven.

- My week is up.

- Wow. Time flies.

Careless.

How about you come over

for dinner tonight?

Allow me to cook for you

to mourn the expiration

of your visitor's pass.

I'd love to. It's a date.

Hey.

I need a little privacy tonight.

So, if it's okay,

can you stay in your room?

- Why?

- Joy's coming over for dinner.

'Cause you know

her time is up and all.

Just dinner for the two of you?

Yes.

It sounds like a date.

I guess it is.

Are you going

to be having intercourse?

If so I recommend

the reverse cowgirl position.

What is wrong with you?

How did you even learn that?

Look, she's a girl that I like

and I want to cook dinner

for her.

You do understand

that I have literally dedicated

my entire existence to you,

right?

Why can't you let me do this

one thing like a normal person?

I will stay in my room

this evening.

There is some programming

that I could do there.

Thanks.

Thanks, Adam. I appreciate it.

I haven't really done this

in so long.

EGBOK.

I'm impressed

with the presentation.

Who taught you?

This little old guy

who ran a stand

by that big Tokyo fish market.

His grandson was a friend

of mine from school.

He took a liking to me.

He didn't really teach me,

though.

They're very careful

how they select

their apprentices over there.

I just hung around and watched.

Every motion and nuance.

So you're saying

if I watch long enough

I will become

a sushi master too?

Who knows.

Keshisan was a master.

I'm just an enthusiastic novice.

Oh, don't be modest.

Looks great.

You haven't even tasted it yet.

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