Unexpected Page #5

---

- and that is number one.

- No, I know. It... it's just...

you seem like a real person,

and I think I would be great at this job.

It's just I cannot start August 1st.

- When are you due?

- July 24th.

- And is this your first?

- Yeah.

I will be honest.

- It gets really crazy here in August.

- Right.

We are getting ready to launch our new

curriculum at the start of the school year.

This is an incredible place to work,

but I don't know that I could have

done it when my son was first born.

If we were talking

about a December start date,

I would say no problem,

but with a week-old baby...

- I'm speaking for me personally.

- No, no. I... I get it.

And I really appreciate you saying that.

It just really sucks to hear.

I hate that clown.

- Yeah, he's bad.

- I mean, get him out of here.

Hey.

What's going on over there?

You have a bad day?

I'm just really mad

about being pregnant today.

Why?

I applied for a job I can't have.

Wait, what job?

I interviewed for a job

at the Field Museum, and I nailed it.

And you didn't tell me about it.

Well, I'm... I'm telling you

about it right now.

What are you doing applying for jobs?

You said you were gonna stay home.

- That wasn't decided.

- That's what we agreed on.

Okay, fine, John, you know what?

You're right, I'm just gonna stay home

and take care of the baby,

so you don't even have

to worry about it anymore.

I'm just gonna be a wife

and a mother, and that's it.

- Samantha, you have got to stop this.

- That'll be my life.

That is what you want.

I mean, you want me to stay home.

It's not what I want.

It's what made sense, okay?

You going back to work right after having

a baby is completely unrealistic.

Is it unrealistic?

Tell me how it's unrealistic

that someone with a baby can work.

In fact, tell the nation of working

mothers how they're all wrong.

I'm not saying they're wrong.

I'm saying...

Listen, we have to talk

about stuff like this, okay?

You can't make decisions like this

by yourself anymore.

These are decisions

about our whole family,

and I don't know why

you're so hell-bent on working.

This could be a nice break for you.

You think that staying home

with an infant is a break? Really?

Well, then why don't you just

quit your job and do it?

I mean, I can't do everything

for this baby.

No one's asking you

to do everything, all right?

I can't breast-feed a newborn.

Working is something I can do.

And apparently it's not anything

I can do anymore,

so just put another point

on the board for men.

Yes, great, more points. I'll be sure

and let all the other worker men know.

You know what? Maybe...

maybe we f***ed up, John.

Maybe we shouldn't have done this.

- What, gotten married?

- Yeah, gotten married.

You know what, Samantha, whether or not

you think we're soul mates right now

doesn't change the fact that we still

have a child on the way, okay?

So you might want to just get over it.

- Hey, Ms. Abbott.

- Hey.

- I brought snacks.

- Yummy.

- So you ready to see your new school?

- Yes, ma'am.

Okay, so we have the tour

scheduled for 11:00.

- Okay.

- I think it's gonna be really fun,

and then we have an appointment

at the admissions office

to go over financial aid

and family housing,

and then when we're done I really

want to take you to Quatro's for pizza

'cause it is so good.

Okay.

- What are you doing?

- Pouring my juice in here.

And you're gonna do what with it?

I'm gonna drink it.

Oh, my God, no. Jasmine, no.

Don't do that. Don't do that.

- Oh, my... stop. No, stop it.

- Yes.

- Oh, my gosh, that's disgusting. Stop it.

- It's so good.

It smells so bad in here. I'm gonna pull over.

No, you need to get rid of that.

- I'm getting... I'm gonna throw up.

- What you want me to do with it?

I'm pulling over, and I want you

to get it out of the car, okay?

- No, no, throw it out of the car.

- Where do you want me to put it?

- Litter! Litter!

- Throw it on the ground?

Just throw it. Just throw it in the ditch.

I don't even care. Just get rid of it.

Just go, go. Go, go, go, drive.

We're gonna get arrested.

Oh, my gosh, it still smells in here.

- It was so good though.

- It smells so bad.

It's beautiful, right?

Yeah.

Let's go.

So how's your visit been?

Did you take a tour with us today?

- Yeah.

- Great.

Yeah, we actually had

a few questions about housing.

Great. Did you get to see

one of our residence halls?

We did, yes, but Jasmine is pregnant,

and she's gonna be bringing

her baby with her next fall.

We wondered if it would be possible

to tour the family housing?

Well, those are only available

to students in our graduate program.

No, I spoke to the housing department

on the phone. They didn't mention that.

They must have misunderstood.

Undergraduates do not have

access to family housing.

If a student is attending with a child,

they generally find housing off campus.

But she can't get financial aid

for off-campus housing.

Correct.

Okay, well, that's crazy.

How is she gonna afford that?

- You can't make exceptions for this?

- We don't make exceptions.

Even if we did, the family housing

has a long waiting list.

Even graduate students

have a difficult time getting in.

I'm sorry.

This university is not the most accommodating

to students in your situation.

Thank you for your time.

This is ridiculous.

Can you believe this? Now we're gonna

have to come back and look at apartments,

and all the good ones are probably

gonna be gone already.

Are you out of your mind?

I can't go here.

What, you're just gonna

give up on college now

because some dumb admissions lady

can't get her sh*t straight?

You're the one who can't get

her sh*t straight.

You're the one who messed up

about the housing, not her.

Hey, look, okay. We'll figure it out.

They have a work studies program.

You can get a job and pay

for your apartment that way.

How am I going to go to school

and work and take care of my baby?

Okay, okay, look,

how about this, all right?

You... you... you stay here

during the week.

You... you get financial aid.

You stay in the dorms,

and your grandmother takes the baby,

and you can go home on the weekends.

I mean, there is a train that goes straight

to Chicago. Go home and be with the baby...

You want me to leave my baby

three hours away for the next four years?

You... you wouldn't be leaving it.

It would be with your grand...

No. No way.

Well, why not? It's an option.

I'm just trying to think of options here.

Can you stop talking to me?

Are you crazy?

I'm not about to leave

my newborn all week long

while I live in a dorm with a roommate

and try to pretend to be

some normal college freshman.

Jasmine, this is a really

great opportunity for you, okay?

And it is gonna be better

for your baby in the long run

if you take advantage of this now.

Would you leave your baby?

I don't belong here, okay?

Even if I did get into the family

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes