Unrelated Page #6

Everyone's a f***ing barrel of laughs tonight.

- You're not going to pack, are you?

- No, no.

- Pool?

- Yeah, cool.

Let's do it!

"I'm just going to pack"? It's the last night. What is that?

I know, it's lame.

- It just isn't the spirit of the holiday, you know.

- It certainly isn't.

- Cheers, man.

- Cheers.

Here's to your Italian Bella we're going to find in Siena tomorrow night.

She is going to be hot!

- She's going to be like nothing you've ever seen before.

- Yeah.

It'll break the, er, the lifelong amnesty.

HE LAUGHS:

Sorry.

DOGS BARK IN DISTANCE

ANNA'S PHONE RINGS

Hi, V.

I'm fine, V.

Yeah, honestly, I'm fine.

I-I'm in a hotel.

In Monteroni, actually.

God! This is grim.

I like it.

- Is it something I've done?

- No, V.

It must be something I've done, you've always talked to me.

Why are you not telling me what's going on?

V...

It's been...it's been years since we've talked to each other properly, hasn't it?

Well, I don't think so. I spoke to you about Anthony only a few months ago.

Well, I suppose there have been things in my life that I haven't told you about.

OK. You probably can't tell me everything. We don't see each other as much as we used to

but if it's something big, wouldn't you tell me?

If something big had happened?

I think the bigger it is, the more difficult it is to tell you.

To tell anybody.

So it's not just me, you mean you don't...

you haven't told anybody else?

What is it?

Oh, come on.

ANNA SOBS:

Don't cry.

What's happened?

ANNA SOBS:

Oh, darling, what's happened?

Come on, come on.

Is it Alex? Is it Alex? What's happened?

- Have you left him?

- No.

Has he left you?

What's happened? Please, tell me.

Anna, Anna, Anna.

What can I do with you?

You are so special. You are such a dear person.

I hate being angry with you but you have really made me

so worried this whole holiday, you have been acting so strangely.

I knew something was wrong.

Come on, tell me what it is. Please, tell me.

And I can help you, I hope I can help you.

What's happened?

I thought I was going to have a baby!

Oh, God.

What do you mean? You're...

- Are you pregnant?

- No.

- You were pregnant?

- No.

I thought I was pregnant.

Right. And then what happened?

I...I went to see...

I went to see a doctor.

- I was sure I was pregnant.

- Yep.

I did a pregnancy test and it was negative but I've known so many people with negative results,

I still thought I was pregnant. I was convinced I was pregnant.

I went to see a doctor and...he... he told me I wasn't pregnant.

And he did some tests and...he told me...

He said that it was a symptom of menopause.

That I'm-I'm-I'm now menopausal

I'm not going to be able to have children any more.

I feel so stupid!

Don't feel stupid.

You were right to think you might be pregnant.

No! But I...

- You're young and it's obviously...

- But I'm not young, am I?

I mean, I had my opportunities and I didn't...and I didn't take them.

I didn't take them when I could.

No, but perhaps the timing wasn't right then, anyway.

You know, the timing's never right, is it?

I mean, you took your opportunities.

I did, I did, I know I did.

You know, and even though... even though perhaps it was

the wrong man the first time round, you still had your children,

you've still got your children.

And, you know, no matter what happens you will always have your children,

your children love you.

And I look and you and I look at them and you're so secure in their love.

It's not as simple as that, it looks like that from the outside.

- Well, V, it is.

- It's not ever as simple as that.

I don't mean to argue with you but it is. That's how it is.

I've seen you, you're surrounded by your family. You belong somewhere.

I will just be forever, now, on the periphery of things.

SHE WASHES HER FACE

You look fine.

It was a sh*t name, wait, I get to change mine. Lilo f***.

- We've had that one.

- Er, er, er, er...rhinoceros f***.

- OK.

- Smoking-kills-you f***, what the f***,

- what about a...

- Rhinoceros f***.

- Rhinoceros f***, what the f***,

- what about a smoking-kills-you f***?

- Smoking-kills-you f***,

what about an Arnie f***?

Arnie f***?!

LAUGHTER:

What the f***, what about a lightning f***?

Lightning f***, what the f***?

How about a...um...

SCREAMING:

Drink it, drink it, drink it. You can't get away with quarters.

- You're going to be hammered!

- Can you be a bit quieter, please?

HE SNIGGERS:

What the f***?

- HE LAUGHS

- Shut-up f***.

LAUGHTER:

What's the matter?

Oh!

SHE SOBS Oh, darling.

Alex...Alex. I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

Darling, I wish I...I wish I could make it better but I can't.

I wish I could.

My first holiday on my own was... when I turned 13, actually.

And from then on I just...

went around either with my brother or just to meet friends,

stay with friends' families.

- Separate?

- Yeah, always.

- And your parents went away at the same time?

- Well, yes.

Yeah, they come out here or just stay in Rome or go on holiday...

- ..with my younger brother.

- Well, we tried!

I like having everyone together.

Well, they're at school most of the time, we don't see enough of them.

- Mm-hm.

- Do we?

- So whereabouts is it in Rome that you live?

I live in an area called Parioli.

- Oh, right.

- Which is just about ten minutes' driving from the centre.

DOOR SQUEAKS:

- Vuoi un po' di caffe'?

- Um, si', um, te'.

- Ah, te'.

- Senza latte, si'.

- Bene.

- Ciao.

- Ciao, buon giorno.

THEY SPEAK ITALIAN

- Ciao.

- Ciao.

- Grazie mille.

- Grazie a voi.

- Ciao.

Have you packed your toothbrush, darling, upstairs?

- Hey.

- Buon giorno.

- Si parte?

- Si', l'anno prossimo arrivo solo, senza famiglia!

- Senza ragazzi!

- Hi.

- Hello, Charlie.

- You OK?

- Yeah.

Where is everyone? Come on. Arch, have you checked everything?

- Yeah, everywhere.

- Really? Really? Double-checked?

- Badge, have you checked everything?

- Yes.

Under the bed, over the wardrobe?

V, can you check... Yes, I've done that.

- I'm going to get the cutlery, OK?

- OK, darling.

- Can you just have a check round once more?

- Yes, of course I will.

V, you're working far too hard.

- NETTA SPEAKS ITALIAN

- Oh, Netta.

I know, I should whisk you off to... I don't know what, a health farm for a week.

- Please do!

- I tell you what, when I'm back in London, come down for a day

and we'll do one of those sort of wrap yourselves in towels

and spend the whole day somewhere hot and steamy.

- We'll just have a good chat.

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