Up The Down Staircase Page #3

very interesting question,

last term, for example,

we studied myths and their meanings

to comprehend in a superb fashion

the origins of many of the idiosyncrasies

of our present language.

Throughout the decades, constant

references to mythological occurrences

have spawned such sparkling gems

as ''By Jove'' and ''Jumping Jupiter.''

-Jumping Jupiter.

-Settle down. Thank you, Harry.

You're doing a very good job, Miss Barrett.

Keep it up.

Class, please.

Jose Rodriguez.

Where is Jose?

Do you have anything

you want to say to the class, Jose?

-Miss Barrett! Miss Barrett!

-Yes.

l think Alice Blake

has the one true answer.

Well, will you tell the class, Alice?

Because just about all books

are based on love, that's why.

All right, class, please. Class.

ls that the only reason that we read?

For instance, what about this? Algebra.

There is no love in that.

Well, Alice?

You're wearing contact lenses?

Suppose we turn

to one of our country's most famous poets

and see how she expresses herself

about books.

Emily

Dickinson,

-Right here.

-All right. That's it. Please!

ln eight short lines she sums up

all the beauty

and adventure that can be found

in reading books,

''...to take us lands away

''This traverse may the poorest take

Without oppress of toil''

Now, do you begin to see

the trend of her thoughts?

Yeah. Yeah.

All right.

Let's examine the poem line by line.

lt begins,

''There is no frigate...''

Class. Class! Please.

Next time try,

''There is no steamship like a book.''

l guess everybody's heard

about that by now, haven't they?

Sorry, just trying to,

in quotes, ''Cheer up Miss Barrett.''

Thank you.

You know, if you take

your first failure so badly,

just think what your hundredth

is going to do to you.

l came here to teach, or l thought l did.

l thought that was what l spent

the last six years preparing for.

Back home,

l used to like to stay after school.

That teacher up there

was giving me something.

Sharing something

she had learned, felt. Teaching.

And what's the first thing l find

when l come to a school of my own?

There is no time for teaching.

There's only time for memos,

directives, circulars,

letters, notices, forms, records, blanks.

And keys. Look what they've given me.

Room key, lavatory key, locker key.

Book room.

Well, at least there are such things,

but this.

This one is for my desk drawer,

and there is no desk drawer.

You know, l bet you did

you master's essay on Chaucer.

How did you guess?

You and the Clerk of Oxenford,

''Gladly would he learn and gladly teach.''

When l finally get the chance,

my first few precious minutes

to talk to them about something

l want them to understand,

and l find l am some kind of an enemy.

The butt of some enormous joke.

The ammunition that they have.

ln my first English class, many years ago,

l quoted from Channing,

''lt is chiefly through books that we enjoy

intercourse with superior minds.''

What kind of thing do you write?

Well, l've just finished the first chapter

of a novel

about a nuclear physicist marooned

on a peninsula, Kamchatka.

That's a far cry from Calvin Coolidge.

l know, a far, far cry.

There's no keys in Kamchatka.

No lockers. No book rooms

and probably no lavatories.

Well, but you and l are here.

Yeah, and there'll come a time

when you'll need a drink

for more cheering up.

Or dinner, sometime?

All right. l would like that.

Good.

Hello, Paul. Hello, Sylvia.

Miss Barrett, step in here, please.

You wait. l'll see you next.

Was this boy in your English class today?

l don't know.

l would have to check my attendance...

Don't bother. He wasn't.

During that period

he was found loitering near 408

where a wallet has been reported missing.

You should have sent in

a cutting slip at once.

Well, there wasn't time.

Mrs. Wolf sent for the library blacklist

and the nurse sent

for the dental blacklist...

Has he given you any trouble

of any other kind?

l don't know what you mean by trouble.

-Trouble. Foul language. Violence.

-No, sir.

Don't be scared of him, Miss Barrett.

l'm just trying to stick to the truth.

There has been no violence

and no foul language.

l hope you haven't got any ideas

about communicating with him,

or understanding him,

or getting through to him.

Did he steal the wallet?

You can go.

Then he didn't steal the wallet.

lt has also come to my attention

that you neglected to fill out form B-221 .

Accident report

of a fall incurred by a student

in your home room yesterday,

and you neglected to turn in a report

on the physical condition of your room

and a summary of your pupil load.

My pupil load is 44 and two-fifths.

Three-fifths students per class.

l believe the directive

says it should be 33, and let me...

Let me see, l just couldn't seem to find

any accidents forms B-221 .

l have a broken window

in the back of my classroom,

and l need two more chairs. Three.

And the custodian simply answers,

''There is no one down here.''

Well, my pupil load, Miss Barrett,

is 3000 students,

An upset neighborhood,

an angry police department

and the entire board of education.

-Let it be a challenge to you, huh?

-Thank you.

Hey, Teach. Hey.

Come on, lady.

-l like you.

-Yeah.

Don't walk this block alone, Teach.

Will the person or persons

who took my desk blotter please return it?

There will be no questions asked.

l just want my desk blotter back.

Now, for our first oral book report

of the term,

we will begin with Danny, Danny Harrigan.

l'm not prepared, Miss Barrett.

Why aren't you prepared, Danny?

What's your excuse?

l had to get married.

See, l got this girl in trouble,

and we're both Catholics.

-The things is, l didn't even like her.

-Well, l...

l accept your excuse, Danny.

So you see, l didn't have very much time

to read any of those books.

Well, will you please return to your seat?

Who did prepare a book report?

Lou Martin to your rescue.

Linda, Linda, Linda.

Do you have a late pass?

Oh, yeah.

What's the bruise over your eye?

Just received it this morning.

That's why l'm late.

Well, will you go directly to the nurse

and have her treat it?

Lou, you can begin your report

while l make out the pass.

-My book is...

-The book you read.

Yeah. The title is called Macbeth,

by Shakespeare.

-The title is.

-Macbeth.

lsn't Macbeth required reading

for last English term?

-l ain't never read it before.

-l've never read it.

Me neither.

ln this book, the author depicts...

Depicts.

-Depicts how this guy, he wants to...

-Who?

Him.

-He.

-Yeah.

All right, Lou,

what is the theme of Macbeth?

Well, the author narrates this murder.

Now, Lou, we don't need you

to show us how. All right, Lou.

Lou. All right, class.

The theme of Macbeth is that too much

ambition can become ruthless ambition

and end up in disaster.

That's what words are for.

To be used.

What does ruthless mean?

Joe?

Eddie.

Steps all over.

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